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how to get my dad to stop opening my mail?

Posted: Mon Jun 29, 2020 6:38 pm
by bikinksterboy
I'm a legal adult, but I still live with my parents. On occasion, I've ordered "adult" items online and had them shipped to my home. This usually isn't an issue as most of my online orders tend to be more tame, but one time recently, I ordered a sex toy and my dad apparently opened the package before handing me the contents of it. For the record, he had 0 reaction one way or the other to the items themselves, but it's still embarrassing and an invasion of my privacy. Hopefully a simple conversation will be enough to fix this. I think I may have already talked to him about it? I'm honestly not sure. It was only the one time that he opened NSFW mail, but he hasn't stopped opening my packages regardless, so it's bound to happen again. Overall my dad is respectful of my boundaries and privacy, and his memory is being impacted as he gets older (my parents are both senior citizens by now, but not elderly yet), so it's entirely possible that he just doesn't think to check in with me beforehand. I really doubt this will be that complicated of a problem to solve, but I figured I'd post here just in case to get other people's thoughts.

Re: how to get my dad to stop opening my mail?

Posted: Tue Jun 30, 2020 6:47 am
by Sam W
Hi bikinksterboy,

This does sound like something a conversation would hopefully solve. Do you happen to have any idea why he's doing this?

Re: how to get my dad to stop opening my mail?

Posted: Tue Jun 30, 2020 6:53 am
by bikinksterboy
I think it may be just force of habit. He opens all the mail that comes through and maybe he's just not making a distinction. I really don't think there's any malice involved.

Re: how to get my dad to stop opening my mail?

Posted: Tue Jun 30, 2020 7:20 am
by Sam W
Okay, in that case maybe just asking, "hey, from now on, can you leave any packages/mail for me on my bed" is a simple starting place.

Re: how to get my dad to stop opening my mail?

Posted: Tue Jun 30, 2020 1:28 pm
by noaccount
Could you mail yourself a large-print copy of Federal Laws 18 U.S. Code 1702 "Obstruction Of Correspondence" and 18 U.S. Code 1708 "Theft or Receipt of Mail Matter Generally" under which it's a federal crime to open another person's mail, or laminate such a large-print copy and tape them up by where mail is left?

Re: how to get my dad to stop opening my mail?

Posted: Sun Jul 12, 2020 5:11 am
by bikinksterboy
I brought it up to my dad and he seemed receptive. Here's hoping it all works out!

Re: how to get my dad to stop opening my mail?

Posted: Sun Jul 12, 2020 7:39 am
by Alexa
Great! Keep us posted if anything else comes up. <3

Re: how to get my dad to stop opening my mail?

Posted: Sun Jul 26, 2020 1:41 pm
by bikinksterboy
seems like it worked!

Re: how to get my dad to stop opening my mail?

Posted: Mon Jul 27, 2020 7:37 am
by Sam W
Hooray!