better ways

Questions and discussion about your sexual lives, choices, activities, ideas and experiences.
crazyboy123
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better ways

Unread post by crazyboy123 »

Masturbating just doesn't feel the same anymore. i feel like i need different ways to do it or switch up my experience. But i dunno what to do??
Sam W
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Re: better ways

Unread post by Sam W »

Hi crazyboy123,

There are a few different ways to incorporate new things into masturbation. One is to switch up the way you masturbate, and you can read about some different ways people do here: Going Solo: The Basics of Masturbation. You could also try incorporating sex toys:
D.I.Y. Sex Toys: Self-Love Edition. You can also explore new fantasies, since sometimes it's our brains that need the change of pace more than our bodies: How to Approach Sexual Fantasy and Desire on Your Own Terms
crazyboy123
not a newbie
Posts: 13
Joined: Sat May 07, 2022 7:53 am
Age: 18
Pronouns: he/him
Location: England

Re: better ways

Unread post by crazyboy123 »

yeah i guess. it's just a struggle as i gotta keep it quiet and secret so i don't get caught. i just want to have better sessions
Sam W
scarleteen staff/volunteer
Posts: 9784
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
Age: 32
Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
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Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: queer
Location: Desert

Re: better ways

Unread post by Sam W »

If privacy is a concern, this article actually has a bunch you're living at home or in another shared space: https://www.scarleteen.com/article/sexu ... rbating_at. And when you say you want the sessions to be better, what would that look or feel like to you?
crazyboy123
not a newbie
Posts: 13
Joined: Sat May 07, 2022 7:53 am
Age: 18
Pronouns: he/him
Location: England

Re: better ways

Unread post by crazyboy123 »

i'm not sure. Just a lot better, and when it finishes i genuinely feel satisfied i guess. I want other ways to masturbate other than using hands and stuff. thanks for the link btw :)
Sam W
scarleteen staff/volunteer
Posts: 9784
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
Age: 32
Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: queer
Location: Desert

Re: better ways

Unread post by Sam W »

You're welcome! If you're looking to branch out beyond using your hands, then I think sex toys may be the way to go, because they can introduce some new and interesting sensations into the mix.
crazyboy123
not a newbie
Posts: 13
Joined: Sat May 07, 2022 7:53 am
Age: 18
Pronouns: he/him
Location: England

Re: better ways

Unread post by crazyboy123 »

yeah that's what i've been looking forward too. but with strict parents and stuff i struggle to buy anything or even make anything. it's frustrating
Sam W
scarleteen staff/volunteer
Posts: 9784
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
Age: 32
Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
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Sexual identity: queer
Location: Desert

Re: better ways

Unread post by Sam W »

That does sound frustrating! Looking at the D.I.Y sex toy article, are there things like masturbation sleeves or vibrators that you could D.I.Y from things that are already at home?
crazyboy123
not a newbie
Posts: 13
Joined: Sat May 07, 2022 7:53 am
Age: 18
Pronouns: he/him
Location: England

Re: better ways

Unread post by crazyboy123 »

i don't have sleeves per say. i have things like rubber gloves and toilet rolls which is good. but lube wise i have nothing. also it would be tough to clean gloves up especially if they need to be used. sorry about this :/
Sam W
scarleteen staff/volunteer
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Re: better ways

Unread post by Sam W »

It's okay, we're happy to help you brainstorm! There are actually a lot of things you can use as lube that you might be able to find in your house. If you look in this article, particularly the "oil based" section, you might find some that will work: Lube 101: A Slick Little primer
crazyboy123
not a newbie
Posts: 13
Joined: Sat May 07, 2022 7:53 am
Age: 18
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Location: England

Re: better ways

Unread post by crazyboy123 »

ahh okay that helps a lot. So would vaseline (the one for your lips) be a viable option?
A seperate note: how does lube help with masturbation?
Sam W
scarleteen staff/volunteer
Posts: 9784
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
Age: 32
Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
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Re: better ways

Unread post by Sam W »

Yep, if you're using it just for masturbation, Vaseline can work as a lubricant. And they way lube helps is by increasing pleasure and comfort; friction on a penis without lube can end up getting very uncomfortable very quickly.
crazyboy123
not a newbie
Posts: 13
Joined: Sat May 07, 2022 7:53 am
Age: 18
Pronouns: he/him
Location: England

Re: better ways

Unread post by crazyboy123 »

Oh okay, well i will try vaseline and attempt to make something that helps with masturbating. Also one more thing: I feel like sometimes i just go and get it over with and that's it. Do you have any tips to build the arousal up for a period of time so that once i do it, its better?
Sam W
scarleteen staff/volunteer
Posts: 9784
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
Age: 32
Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
Primary language: english
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Location: Desert

Re: better ways

Unread post by Sam W »

There are a few different ways to extend the amount of time you masturbate. One is to focus more time on the "build-up," where you're doing things like fantasizing or consuming sexual media. Another is to pause when you notice yourself getting close to orgasm, let your arousal go down a little, and then start up again.
crazyboy123
not a newbie
Posts: 13
Joined: Sat May 07, 2022 7:53 am
Age: 18
Pronouns: he/him
Location: England

Re: better ways

Unread post by crazyboy123 »

Oh okay that makes a lot of sense. I just want to thank you for your help. Hopefully it makes my life a lot better!
Sam W
scarleteen staff/volunteer
Posts: 9784
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
Age: 32
Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: queer
Location: Desert

Re: better ways

Unread post by Sam W »

You're welcome!
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