Hi Iced_Coffee, and welcome to Scarleteen! I'm glad you found us.
Ultimately, I don't believe anyone has to hit some minimum level of dysphoria or discomfort with their assigned-at-birth gender before they're "allowed" to say they're trans or pursue some sort of transition. There's no amount of misery you have to feel as a guy before you can decide that being a girl is what you want; if you think you'd like that better
, or it feels more right
to you, that's enough of a reason to pursue this, in my mind.
It's true that coming out to people, reminding them of a new name or pronouns, and navigating other parts of your life as a trans person can be stressful. It absolutely can be hard and distressing and cause a lot of personal upheaval in one's life. What I will say, though, is that it's very very rare for me to come across someone who regrets making that decision, despite those hardships, and that the trans people I know would say the benefits of living as your most authentic self outweigh the downsides. It's okay to feel scared, or to feel like this is something you want to think about longer before taking certain steps (or any at all), but if and when you do
feel more certain, I hope that fear won't keep you from it entirely. We're certainly here to help talk through any worries you have as they come up.
Have you seen our Trans Summer School
series of articles? That might be helpful to look through, if you haven't yet. The Am I Trans Enough?
page may be of particular help as you're thinking about this.
I do also want to link to turn-me-into-a-girl.com
, which I think has one of the simplest and most lovely exercises I've ever seen for helping someone think about their own gender identity.