STD prevention while conceiving?

Questions and discussion about contraception, safer sex, STIs, sexual healthcare and other sexual health issues.
CatMommy
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STD prevention while conceiving?

Unread postby CatMommy » Fri Aug 07, 2020 3:13 pm

Hello I’ve used scarleteen before but created a new account since I couldn’t get into my old one. So I’m back!
Anyway, for starters I’m in a relationship with my girlfriend. We’re in an open relationship so I’m single on the males section. When this whole pandemic is over we want to start a family. But we don’t wanna pay a fortune and we don’t want a father in our kids life. Just me and her raising it. So I’m wondering if there’s a way to reduce the risk of stds while trying to conceive? I know birth control pills don’t prevent stds but prevent pregnancy and condoms prevent both pregnancy and stds. But what about prevention/reducing risks of stds but trying to conceive?
(Btw the methods were thinking of doing is either me having a one night stand or having a donor and use turkey base thing)

Mo
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Re: STD prevention while conceiving?

Unread postby Mo » Fri Aug 07, 2020 3:50 pm

What I'd recommend you do, when you decide you're going to start trying to conceive, is checking in with your doctor; they'll have some thoughts about avenues to pursue and any health issues you'd need to keep in mind when trying to conceive. Sperm donations are thoroughly screened so there should be little to no risk of STD/STI transmission through that avenue, but with potential partners, you can ask people when their last comprehensive STI test was done and ask about safer sex practices and the number of partners they've had since then, but if you're talking about meeting people casually that doesn't give you an opportunity to develop a lot of trust with them to know if you're willing to accept their answers as accurate or not.
In addition, I don't know what your plan would be in terms of seeking to get pregnant through a one night stand with someone, but if someone creates a pregnancy with you, whether or not you want them to be an active parent, they would have certain parental rights and would deserve to know beforehand that you're seeking to become pregnant. I really couldn't recommend trying to do this without doing a lot of research about family law in your area beforehand and being very upfront with any potential partners, even if you intend for them to be one-time or casual partners.
This is part of why I think talking to your doctor first will be helpful; they'll probably have some resources and information they can point you to.

CatMommy
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Re: STD prevention while conceiving?

Unread postby CatMommy » Sat Aug 08, 2020 2:53 pm

Thank you for your recommendations.

Now what about if I’m going the turkey base route? Do you know of a way to mitigate the risks under that scenario? That’s what my girlfriend wants to do when it’s her turn to conceive our second child.

(About what you said how I should let my partner know, well, the reason why I wouldn’t is because I don’t want them in the kids life so as long as they don’t know me or my intent it’ll all be anonymous)

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Re: STD prevention while conceiving?

Unread postby Alexa » Sun Aug 09, 2020 9:00 am

Hi CatMommy,

It's hard to say whether different STIs would survive via the "turkey-baster" route, and it is also dependent on whether the ejaculate remains at body temperature between ejaculation and insemination, so I would still recommend the precautions that Mo referenced.

Further, I have to emphasize what they said about parental rights & being upfront -- whether you want this person to be a part of the child's life or not, they have the fundamental right to know if you have conceived a child together. Just as with sex, consent here is absolutely essential. That being said, if you choose to be inseminated by an individual, even through a casual encounter, you will need to be open with them about your intent to conceive and ask them about their willingness to participate.
Alexa K.
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