Search found 68 matches

by Sofi
Mon Jun 14, 2021 8:58 am
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Disappointed in my bf
Replies: 7
Views: 143

Re: Disappointed in my bf

I also want to ask, do you have other ways you can de-stress or feel more at ease when you're upset? I don't want you to rely on him as your only way to feel better, because it's always best to have ways of self care (not that we should go through things alone, it's of course good to also have peopl...
by Sofi
Mon Jun 14, 2021 8:00 am
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Disappointed in my bf
Replies: 7
Views: 143

Re: Disappointed in my bf

Hi Hel, This is a tricky one, because we need to have a balance between making sure our needs are met by our partner but also leaving space for their needs. You're right that your boyfriend has to put in effort, you are in a relationship and care about each other, so if you express your needs he nee...
by Sofi
Mon May 10, 2021 11:26 am
Forum: Relationships
Topic: My best friend, my crush, and me
Replies: 7
Views: 1949

Re: My best friend, my crush, and me

First of all, thank you for opening up and trusting us with this. It's definitely a hard situation you're in and I want to acknowledge your feelings of confusion and frustration. I do have to say, I don't consider your feelings "dirty" or "petty". It is perfectly normal to feel j...
by Sofi
Mon May 10, 2021 9:52 am
Forum: Sexual Health
Topic: The side of my shaft hurts.
Replies: 2
Views: 1320

Re: The side of my shaft hurts.

It's likely you just need to take a break from masturbating, and be gentle if/when you do. You should be okay if you just take care of yourself for a couple of days. If the pain persists in a day or two, it might be good to check with a doctor.
by Sofi
Mon May 10, 2021 9:23 am
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Brutally Honest
Replies: 13
Views: 5051

Re: Brutally Honest

Hi girlplayer34, I'm sorry to hear you're still struggling with this. I know it's been hard being the single friend, and also still being a virgin. Fear of ending up alone is valid, but please try to be a bit less pessimistic about it! You are going to find someone for you, it just might take more p...
by Sofi
Mon May 10, 2021 8:38 am
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Old feelings coming up about a former crush
Replies: 1
Views: 1374

Re: Old feelings coming up about a former crush

Hi waves15, welcome to the boards! It definitely seems like you still have feelings for this girl after all this time. On one hand, people can change a lot in four years, and just because we don't like someone today doesn't mean we never will. At the same time, though, you wouldn't want to make her ...
by Sofi
Mon Apr 26, 2021 10:50 am
Forum: Bodies
Topic: Cleaning
Replies: 5
Views: 2471

Re: Cleaning

Honestly, it seems you are doing everything right as far as how you're cleaning the area. Gentle scrubbing with a towel and soap for a minute or two would remove any dirt built up. It is common for the skin in your inner thighs to be darker, so perhaps it is just a darker tone. I wouldn't worry too ...
by Sofi
Thu Apr 15, 2021 10:48 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: How effective is sperm/semen outside the body?
Replies: 12
Views: 1621

Re: How effective is sperm/semen outside the body?

I'm so glad to hear it. You're very welcome! <3
by Sofi
Wed Apr 14, 2021 8:29 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: How effective is sperm/semen outside the body?
Replies: 12
Views: 1621

Re: How effective is sperm/semen outside the body?

There's really no way it can! Quoted from the article: "The way people become pregnant is through direct vulval or vaginal contact with semen that is being ejaculated right there and then". Also, sperm can only stay motile for half an hour "out in the open" (outside testicles or ...
by Sofi
Tue Apr 13, 2021 9:04 am
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Another Ex and a lot of mixed emotions
Replies: 26
Views: 1906

Re: Another Ex and a lot of mixed emotions

There are a few articles or advice columns that have helpful info; none are specifically only about romantic loneliness, but they touch on that subject. This one was written by Mo: Are relationships really as complicated as people make them out to be? This one is about being a lesbian and lonely, bu...
by Sofi
Fri Apr 09, 2021 11:55 am
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Another Ex and a lot of mixed emotions
Replies: 26
Views: 1906

Re: Another Ex and a lot of mixed emotions

This definitely makes sense. It's normal for people to want to be single yet feel lonely, and miss things such as physical intimacy, both romantic and sexual. You know it's good not to suppress them, but it's also not good to act on them. Coping mechanisms (healthy ones) are important to keep under ...
by Sofi
Fri Apr 09, 2021 10:31 am
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Another Ex and a lot of mixed emotions
Replies: 26
Views: 1906

Re: Another Ex and a lot of mixed emotions

Hi BuddyBoi21! I'm sorry to hear about the breakup, I know it had been something floating in the back of your mind for a bit but it was hard to make that final decision. My opinion is always that if a relationship doesn't feel all the way 'right', and you're having lots of doubts about it, it's not ...
by Sofi
Tue Apr 06, 2021 12:29 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Confused about sexuality and masturbation
Replies: 4
Views: 706

Re: Confused about sexuality and masturbation

Hi there, welcome to the boards! The good thing about labels regarding sexuality is that only WE can determine which ones to use. It sounds like you could certainly identify as queer or bi/pansexual, but if you feel like that doesn't apply, it's entirely up to you what to use instead. I personally f...
by Sofi
Mon Apr 05, 2021 3:33 pm
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Supporting loved ones while maintaining emotional boundaries
Replies: 2
Views: 823

Re: Supporting loved ones while maintaining emotional boundaries

Something I started implementing a few years ago, and have practiced more during the pandemic, is letting my loved ones know that if I don't have the emotional capacity to support them at a specific time, I will simply say so, with the promise to come back to them when I do. So when they come to me ...
by Sofi
Wed Mar 31, 2021 9:06 am
Forum: Et Cetera
Topic: Grew Out of it, but Trying to Process
Replies: 9
Views: 2799

Re: Grew Out of it, but Trying to Process

I'm so sorry you dealt with all of that, especially at such a young age when being picked on matters a lot. You shouldn't feel gullible for not knowing your best friend was lying to you, that could happen to anyone and it isn't your fault! Also as a side note, arachnophobia is serious and people of ...
by Sofi
Sat Mar 27, 2021 8:42 am
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Aromantic but not by choice?
Replies: 5
Views: 944

Re: Aromantic but not by choice?

Hi there, I want to begin with a gentle reminder that labels for our sexuality exist to make things easier for us and provide space and community. They should feel like they fit, and provide comfort. If you don't feel that connection to a label (aromantic in this case), you don't have to use it and ...
by Sofi
Sat Mar 27, 2021 8:02 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: How can I break up with someone I care about?
Replies: 3
Views: 832

Re: How can I break up with someone I care about?

You're welcome! :D
by Sofi
Thu Mar 25, 2021 4:18 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: How can I break up with someone I care about?
Replies: 3
Views: 832

Re: How can I break up with someone I care about?

Hi there, welcome to the boards. I understand break-ups can be hard, especially with someone who is also a close friend. Remember you have to put your own well-being first, so as much as you're trying to avoid hurting her (which is good and a sign you do care!), you also need to take care of your ow...
by Sofi
Thu Mar 04, 2021 5:04 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: How to deal with feeling sexually exploited
Replies: 3
Views: 883

Re: How to deal with feeling sexually exploited

Hi Hedvig, I am so sorry to hear you went through that experience and are now feeling this way. I'm also super glad to hear your new partner is caring and respects your boundaries. You are definitely not damaged or dirty. It is, however, normal for people who have been through sexual assault or coer...
by Sofi
Wed Mar 03, 2021 10:57 am
Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
Topic: Am I too obsessed with my celebrity crush?
Replies: 17
Views: 2584

Re: Am I too obsessed with my celebrity crush?

Hi belled, Honestly, I don't think this is "weird" or out of line. First of all, you are clearly aware of this being a crush and not an actual relationship, and also you're respectful of boundaries. Sure, you spend a lot of time thinking about her, but you respect her when you do talk to h...
by Sofi
Wed Mar 03, 2021 9:18 am
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Parent of gay 9 year old asking for advice
Replies: 11
Views: 1207

Re: Parent of gay 9 year old asking for advice

Putting in my 2 cents: movies/TV shows. She might be a bit young for some of them right now, that's up to you of course, but as she enters her pre-teens and teens it's important she has access to a wide variety of Queer cinema. When I was younger, my parents wouldn't let me watch media that had same...
by Sofi
Wed Mar 03, 2021 9:01 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Period after 15 days
Replies: 6
Views: 689

Re: Period after 15 days

Honestly, I will suggest talking to your mom about getting a new healthcare provider, particularly a new gynecologist. It isn't recommended to have your own family member be your doctor, for several reasons, and in this case it worries me that her machine isn't working so you're experiencing a delay...
by Sofi
Thu Feb 11, 2021 7:54 am
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Polyamorous
Replies: 2
Views: 1023

Re: Polyamorous

You're right, it's not fair to judge poly relationships or poly people. It's definitely 'normal' to want that, and isn't wrong at all. The importance here is that this must be communicated clearly to any and all partners. If you're not crystal clear about your wants and needs, it could easily lead t...
by Sofi
Wed Feb 10, 2021 10:04 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Birth Control Fear
Replies: 9
Views: 2522

Re: Birth Control Fear

That makes sense, and it's valid for you to want to be extra careful. It's good you're using double contraceptive methods, but it also means you should ease the anxiety over your mishap in September. You are doing great and are protected, so try to worry less about what happened back then!
by Sofi
Wed Feb 10, 2021 9:52 am
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Gay Energy
Replies: 3
Views: 936

Re: Gay Energy

I'm sorry you've been feeling targeted from several sides, for both your sexual orientation and your political views. I want you to try to ignore people who say things like "you emulate gay energy" because that is not worth giving your attention and time to. You don't have to lie to people...

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