Hey lz -- thank you for trusting us enough to share this experience with us. It sounds like it's been weighing on you a lot. I'm hoping we can lead you to understanding what happened better. Something I want to emphasize though is that it - though I understand why you're looking for other people's t...

Hey Soph -- Though I'm not sure exactly what Same had in mind in terms of connecting with your body, I can for sure start that brainstorm. There are a lot of ways to do this, and it's truly unique to every person because no one really has and understands their body the same way as another person doe...

Hey Ryan -- a little bit clarification first: your anus is just the hole. The rectum is the inside, which is where your finger, a penis, a toy, etc. would go. Feces is stored in your colon, not your rectum. The rectum may still contain residual feces from past bowel movements, and those traces may s...

Hey LightUpTheStage -- I agree, there are some inconsistencies in U.S. law. I think something that also complicates things is the fact that some states have different laws than others, an example of this being age of consent differing in different states. I don't really have an explanation for why o...

You're making sense here! Being heavily scrutinized like that sounds really taxing. When they ask you those questions, how do you usually respond? How does the conversation go after that? I know I don't know your parents the way you do, but it sounds like some of this invasiveness - even for how ann...

Hey dependantdragon -- there's a lot we can talk about here! I probably won't be be able to hit every single thing in this first response, but I'll start by just jumping in with my initial reactions. Something I've noticed in the last several years is how much pressure there is socially and cultural...

Hey McGoof -- though I don't know exactly what Elise had in mind, I can help start a brainstorm. Can we start with what's worked for you in the past? How have you distracted yourself?

I totally understand where you're coming from with all this, I've had very similar experiences. Pretty recently too actually. One of the biggest takeaways I've gotten from how hard it was is that there is no perfect, linear trajectory...with anything, really. Even if there seems to be dominate narra...

That helped, thank you! I just wanted to make sure I understood the situation you're in correctly. You've talked a lot about mental health concerns with us, and I'm glad you'll have an opportunity to have some time to concentrate on yourself. You mentioned that you'd feel like it was a step backward...

Hey Raffles -- for what it's worth, I think you are really good at describing your feelings. Even if you had to do it on a form, I think you could do it well. Those are all very valid concerns. I'm sorry if we touched on this topic in this or another thread, but can you remind me the details of the ...

Hey again -- I totally get just not knowing what could work, and sometimes we don't even know exactly what to suggest for folks. I do think this will take some experimentation, especially if there's different preferences within your plural system and you want to try to incorporate that. If you're no...

Hey Whispermae -- I'm seeing two separate but related issues here, and I'm going to try to address them one at a time. In the incident recently with the ECG, it sounds like you were experiencing the state people often describe has "being triggered." I'm not sure how this term is used in In...

Hey McGoof -- I feel comfortable sharing with you that this is something I've also been exploring for myself in recent years. I'm not part of a plural system, but I think some of that has helped me might help you. My first suggestion, which you sort of touched on, is to really make your room feel li...

Hey Mattt -- this is a really common topic on our boards actually, and many users wonder if they're doing something wrong. It sounds like you understand that all bodies are different; with that being the case, it's hard for us to be able to tell you exactly what to do that will help what's going on....

Hey Crow -- appreciate you bumping this back up! We do our best to respond to everything as quickly as we can, but sometimes it isn't as quickly as we like it to be. This can be especially sticky to navigate when we see a good conversation going with a particular user and volunteer and don't want to...

Hey SillyMcGoof -- I notice that money is often a big factor when it comes to gender affirmation, especially for younger users. I'm always wondering if there's something that isn't material or something one needs to buy that could be gender affirming. Maybe, if anatomy language is something that com...

Hey Raffles -- up top I want to point out is that there is a lot of negative self-talk in your post. While I trust your perspective and agree that HR could be handling things differently/better, I wondering if this is the right way to position some of this. By assuming that they're viewing helping y...

Hey there -- we have quite a few threads going with you at the moment, and they're all very similar. Making multiple threads will make it harder for us to keep track of everything you're saying, which could make it harder for us to talk with you. Can I ask you to limit making new threads about this ...

Hey Ryan -- that sounds like a good idea. Is there anything else we can help with right now?

Hey staplesj_ -- I totally understand that frustration, but I want to assure that there is no timeline. There's no right or good or correct time for these things, so no one is late or early. They just come to it when they do. I'm wondering if something you can do in the meantime is work on the conne...

Hey SillyMcGoof -- what feels scary about HRT? You mentioned some stuff that's coming up, but can you elaborate on those feelings? Answering these will help us give you advice, but also sometimes just letting it all flow out can help you come to a decision. This might be especially helpful if there'...

Gotcha, that helps me understand a little but more. When you think of these past experiences, what did they have in common? What was different, and have any of those times felt more fulfilling?

Hi Crow -- I'm going to back up a few steps here. I'm wondering, what inspired wanting to sort this out? I'm not trying to talk you out of it, but I think you articulated your feelings about sex really clearly. You like the idea of sex in theory, but in practice it hasn't been enjoyable and you don'...

Hey SillyMcGoof -- welcome to the boards! There's a lot we can break down here and talk through. I was looking at your other thread and I think there's a lot of overlap. Gender-affirming touch, or lack thereof, could definitely be something that impacts body dysphoria. I'm wondering if having some c...

Hey 42 -- You raise a really good question about healthy relationships. Other may feel differently, but I'm not sure if there is a general rule around stuff like this. I think it has a lot to do with capacity to care and reciprocate, which I tend to picture in my head as a pitcher full of water and ...