If the condom comes off, it's going to be noticeable, especially when the person pulls out. The same is true for if it breaks.

We will not answer ANY questions about pregnancy fear or anxiety in our direct services from users who are not pregnant or who are not or have not otherwise been directly involved with an actual pregnancy. Please do not post this kind of question. If you are seeing this text, and your thread is loc...

That's good! Fingers crossed things continue to go well.

My understanding is that if it reached the pointing of doing damage, it would still be in your system.

When she said that to you, did the two of you then discuss how you could shift that dynamic a little so that you have an easier time preventing your feelings from overriding the facts?

When they give you that advice, do you and they talk about what you can do in moments where you're struggling to do those things?

Hi Carmensandiego,

I would say getting tested now is a sound call, period, since it's been awhile since you were last tested and it's useful to know your status. And yes, even if it was contracted awhile ago, if chlamydia is still in your system it will be found on the test.

Hi Janelle, As long as the condom did not break or come off, you can assume it did its' job. If it's stressing you out to use only condoms and withdrawal, it might be time to consider adding in another method (and we can provide resources on how to do that if you like). If you're worried about your ...

Hi Milkshake.angel,

It can be, but it can also be from a number of other things. That's really the case with a lot of pregnancy symptoms, and you can read more about that here: Chicken Soup for the Pregnancy Symptom Freakout's Soul

Can I ask if this is a hypothetical question?

That sounds like a good starting place. Is after-school not an option because of your family, or for a different reason?

Is there a way you can use whatever behavioral stuff they've put in place to at least get to the point where you could ask this person out and go with them somewhere? Or are the guidelines set at your place pretty arbitrary?

You could also try going out right after school. Is that an option?

What tends to determine whether or not you can get out? Is it based on their moods or do they tie it to certain behaviors of yours?

Are they preventing you from dating anyone? Or are they more in the vein of not letting you go out at all right now?

Then I'd wait until you've got more availability. With not being sure you could go out, is that a schedule issue or does it have more to do with your home situation?

There are a ton of possible reasons why the U.S has the culture around sexuality that it does, but two that come to mind for me are how we've decided to view young people and how enmeshed religious values are. If you look at places like the Netherlands, which have a very different approach to sexual...

It may help to know that when a condom has a hole or a tear, that hole will be noticeable. So if the condom had a hole in it, you would have seen it.

Gotcha. Then a good first step would be to say something like, "hey, you seem really cool, and I'd like to get to know you more. How about meeting me for coffee/ice cream/whatever this weekend?" Since it sounds like you're interested in her romantically, you'd also want to be clear that th...

Hi Kittypink,

Is this someone you know pretty well, or are at least somewhat acquainted with? Or does approaching her mean approaching someone more in the stranger category?

Hi Abicelo, There isn't a way for us to say for certain if you were sexually assaulted as a child, especially since there's not an incident of assault or abuse that you're remembering. All we have is a list of other factors that could be the result of abuse but could also be the result of other phys...

Yes, if two people want to engage in mutually enjoyable sexual relationship and are being careful about things like STIs and birth control, then that's something they get to do.

I can't speak for everyone who put those laws in place, but a big part of it is preventing people from producing and circulating child pornography (at least as far as sexting laws focusing on young people). That's a good thing to prevent, but those laws do pose the risk of catching young people tryi...

With the "undoing sexual shame" article, focusing on step two and step three right now sounds like it's the best fit for you. That means doing some soul-searching to figure out where some of those feelings of guilt originated, like with your family or your religion. It also means stepping ...

Hi Kindascared, There's a ton of stuff going on her for you, so it's no wonder that you're feeling down and emotional. You're dealing with a lot of big things all at once, and it doesn't sound like you're getting much support in dealing with them. With dating and relationships, plenty of people have...

You're welcome, and glad to hear you're feeling better

Gynecological exams are never really pleasant, but you're right that the pain you experienced is not the norm. It's possible there is something going on that makes the exam more painful than average. Too, at this point you've now had two bad experiences, which is (understandably) going to make you a...