Search found 7170 matches

by Heather
Tue Jul 13, 2021 2:02 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: I don't know what to do
Replies: 49
Views: 944

Re: I don't know what to do

Jenny, I think your sister-in-law and the brother she is married to sound like the right people to be talking with and asking for help. I'd be very honest with them, and not feel at all reticent to ask for what you need. If possible, I wonder if one thing they might be willing to do is arrange to co...
by Heather
Tue Jul 13, 2021 7:56 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: I don't know what to do
Replies: 49
Views: 944

Re: I don't know what to do

Jenny - I also have a couple emails out to SD disability services asking for some specific resources for you. I’ll keep you in the loop if I hear back, and if I don’t, I’ll do some more looking/calling myself. I’m also happy to give you some places to call with questions to ask if you’d like to do t...
by Heather
Sun Jul 11, 2021 1:29 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: I don't know what to do
Replies: 49
Views: 944

Re: I don't know what to do

By the way, I'm heading off for the day, but I want to leave you with this starter list of links for disability services in Minnesota: m I think that it would be worth your time to call a few of these and see what might be available to help intervene and help work with you and your family to get you...
by Heather
Sun Jul 11, 2021 1:17 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: I don't know what to do
Replies: 49
Views: 944

Re: I don't know what to do

The only free online "therapy" I found was strangers that listen to you while you talk. That's not exactly therapy. I'm not quite sure what you mean by this, or what's disqualifying for you here. Every therapist is a stranger until we meet them and start working with them, for one. But by...
by Heather
Sun Jul 11, 2021 11:58 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: I don't know what to do
Replies: 49
Views: 944

Re: I don't know what to do

I think that it would serve you to recognize that there are probably going to be a lot of situations in life in which in order to get some of what you want, you are going to have to accept something that isn't quite or exactly what you're looking for. It has been sounding to me like it might often b...
by Heather
Sun Jul 11, 2021 9:59 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: I don't know what to do
Replies: 49
Views: 944

Re: I don't know what to do

Hey, jenny -- do you have a therapist or counselor for yourself? I ask because it sounds like someone you could really stand is not just someone to talk to, but someone who would be just for you, who would be your ally/advocate, who could both help you with these steps towards autonomy, but also pot...
by Heather
Thu Jul 08, 2021 5:01 pm
Forum: Sex, Culture and Politics
Topic: Educating young kids on LGBT+ identites
Replies: 6
Views: 285

Re: Educating young kids on LGBT+ identites

The thing is, it isn’t okay to say it’s better to be dead than gay. Not at all. Personally, I would not say it’s okay to anyone to believe that. I also wouldn’t say to a child it’s okay to believe it’s wrong to be gay just like I wouldn’t say to a child it’s okay to believe it’s wrong to be disabled...
by Heather
Thu Jul 08, 2021 1:57 pm
Forum: Sex, Culture and Politics
Topic: Educating young kids on LGBT+ identites
Replies: 6
Views: 285

Re: Educating young kids on LGBT+ identites

Hey there, Raffles. I'm so sorry that this happened to you today! I totally understand feeling shocked and freezing up or just not being sure what to do in a moment like this. It's a lot to try and figure out in the moment! Legally, it's unlikely you can't be pretty plainspoken in moments like this ...
by Heather
Thu Jul 08, 2021 12:43 pm
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Interested in bdsm at a young age
Replies: 7
Views: 1228

Re: Interested in bdsm at a young age

Yep!
by Heather
Thu Jul 08, 2021 12:36 pm
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Interested in bdsm at a young age
Replies: 7
Views: 1228

Re: Interested in bdsm at a young age

Welcome! :). There's no kind of *private* user-to-user messaging available in any of the services on our site. However, users can talk with each other publicly but anonymously here on the boards as much as y'all would like, that's much of what they're here for!
by Heather
Thu Jul 08, 2021 12:27 pm
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Interested in bdsm at a young age
Replies: 7
Views: 1228

Re: Interested in bdsm at a young age

(Just FYI, private user-to-user chat here isn't enabled for everyone's privacy and safety.)
by Heather
Thu Jul 08, 2021 12:24 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: I don't know what to do
Replies: 49
Views: 944

Re: I don't know what to do

That sounds like a pretty tough seizure disorder, and like it's been very hard to live with. 30 seizures a month is so many, my goodness. (and ugh, I remember things like all the brain scans and all the things they try -- it's so much.) I'm glad that you've been able to reduce them so drastically re...
by Heather
Thu Jul 08, 2021 8:03 am
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: im 13 and i wanna masturbate
Replies: 4
Views: 642

Re: im 13 and i wanna masturbate

Or you may mean your cervix, if you're talking about way back in your vagina. If so, that is the end of your uterus, and while all of our insides, including the vagina, are effectively "guts" you're right, that is also your guts! But it's normal, totally tethered -- like, it's not going an...
by Heather
Thu Jul 08, 2021 8:00 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: I don't know what to do
Replies: 49
Views: 944

Re: I don't know what to do

Just a P.S. to Urna's reply, I started having seizures when I was around 11, and have had a couple types of epilepsy throughout my life since. Most of the time, I've been able to take medication that has controlled my epilepsy so that it's allowed me to do things like drive (I don't now, but I used ...
by Heather
Wed Jul 07, 2021 2:45 pm
Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
Topic: Friendship and Boundaries
Replies: 15
Views: 382

Re: Friendship and Boundaries

I'm heading out for the day, but the next time I'm around (tomorrow) I'd be happy to talk to you about the assault if you'd like (I'm also a survivor, and this is something I can do), help you find someone else to talk with if you prefer, or both. Hang in there, and I support whatever choice feels r...
by Heather
Wed Jul 07, 2021 2:43 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: I don't know what to do
Replies: 49
Views: 944

Re: I don't know what to do

Jenny: Before you added this, I had initially responded differently. I left that response at the end of this one for you. I'm very sorry that you're feeling so bad about your pacing with your romantic and sexual experience. I absolutely understand how that can be painful: I've heard from a lot of pe...
by Heather
Wed Jul 07, 2021 2:15 pm
Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
Topic: Friendship and Boundaries
Replies: 15
Views: 382

Re: Friendship and Boundaries

This sounds like a LOT to be carrying around and trying to sort through. It also sounds like you feel really burdened by it, and I'm so sorry about that. I totally understand how assault can really spin your head around relationships, all of them, any of them, and I also get how some of the dynamics...
by Heather
Wed Jul 07, 2021 1:56 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: I don't know what to do
Replies: 49
Views: 944

Re: I don't know what to do

Stepping to the side of this issue, and what you see as a barrier, with your sister for the moment, it may also be that your current friends aren't the right dating pool for you right now, including because you clearly don't feel like they are, and because that's a circle that includes your sister, ...
by Heather
Wed Jul 07, 2021 8:02 am
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Fingering how-to?
Replies: 2
Views: 417

Re: Fingering how-to?

Hey there, Hel. The thing is, there's no one "how to" for any of this that's universal, especially once you've got things like specific health conditions like this involved. And in your case, it literally sounds like your condition may make it so that, so far, this particular activity is g...
by Heather
Wed Jul 07, 2021 7:52 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: I don't know what to do
Replies: 49
Views: 944

Re: I don't know what to do

Hey there, Jenny. I'm sorry that you're feeling so lonely and so isolated. I think one tricky part in this is that I'm hearing a lot about what you want and need for yourself, but the thing is that once there's another person in this mix, they're going to come to this with wants and needs, too. So, ...
by Heather
Wed Jul 07, 2021 7:45 am
Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
Topic: Friendship and Boundaries
Replies: 15
Views: 382

Re: Friendship and Boundaries

Hey there. Glad to hear the talk went well. By all means, he can be doing nothing wrong, but you can still be feeling uncomfortable: both of those things can be true! In terms of how someone can consider someone very important in a given period of time, there really is no one period of time for that...
by Heather
Mon Jul 05, 2021 7:57 am
Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
Topic: Friendship and Boundaries
Replies: 15
Views: 382

Re: Friendship and Boundaries

I'm happy to have been able to help. You know where to find us if you need more help with this or anything else, or want to talk. :). I hope that your talk goes well!
by Heather
Sun Jul 04, 2021 12:07 pm
Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
Topic: Friendship and Boundaries
Replies: 15
Views: 382

Re: Friendship and Boundaries

Since you have made clear you’re not interested and only want to be friends, I feel like you asking for details about his non-platonic feelings sends a very mixed message about that, you know? It also feels a little like an emotional violation to me: asking him to talk to you about that when you’re ...
by Heather
Sun Jul 04, 2021 11:13 am
Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
Topic: Friendship and Boundaries
Replies: 15
Views: 382

Re: Friendship and Boundaries

I can understand all of this. I don't actually think that there's anything wrong with having boundaries around fears -- in other words, I think boundaries around concerns AND fears are both equally valid. How might you feel about starting with one boundary, which is that you aren't comfortable being...
by Heather
Sun Jul 04, 2021 9:22 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: No Sexual Desire or Pleasure, Ever
Replies: 86
Views: 19395

Re: No Sexual Desire or Pleasure, Ever

Sandpiper! I am just now reading this, and I am so thrilled and delighted for you! I know there are still some anxieties and some confusions and ups and downs, but there is so much good stuff in here, and on the whole, this all sounds so good, and so much like things are set on a better direction fo...

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