Search found 91 matches

by Iwanthelp
Mon Feb 27, 2017 6:18 am
Forum: Abuse & Assault
Topic: Feeling Too Much At Once
Replies: 96
Views: 16184

Re: Feeling Too Much At Once

I remember in the previous thread you mentioned him pulling away/ignoring you at points. That can very easily screw with a persons' head and an abuser knows it, like the intended affect is "wow, even this person who interacts with me to hurt me/is a relative in the same house won't talk to me h...
by Iwanthelp
Mon Feb 13, 2017 12:43 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: I'm straight but I'm also not
Replies: 6
Views: 1516

Re: I'm straight but I'm also not

I feel like you've got enough indicators of not-straightness that you could go for a bi or gay label personally - a lot of female/female attraction gets written off as "ah yes just gals being pals maximum hetero nothing to see here" so it can be hard to recognize our attractions as we're g...
by Iwanthelp
Sun Feb 05, 2017 7:38 am
Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
Topic: Frigging massive post of held-back awkwardness
Replies: 4
Views: 1140

Re: Frigging massive post of held-back awkwardness

The 'low libidos in lesbians' thing might be talking about 'lesbian bed death', which has been disproved a lot. http://www.goodtherapy.org/blog/truth-about-lesbian-bed-death-its-complicated-1210134 http://closetedlesbianopinions.tumblr.com/ might be handy to read through if you're debating whether y...
by Iwanthelp
Mon Jan 30, 2017 10:40 am
Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
Topic: He pretends to break up with me?
Replies: 2
Views: 897

Re: He pretends to break up with me?

I'm gonna chime in and add that lundy bancroft's Why does he Do That book got put online as a pdf and it's pretty good, one of the things it highlights is its' not mental illness or insecurity causing abuse but being abusive itself. Its' not his insecurity doing this and he's not 'just joking' he's ...
by Iwanthelp
Fri Jan 27, 2017 3:48 pm
Forum: Abuse & Assault
Topic: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)
Replies: 49
Views: 18840

Re: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)

maybe incest still counts when it's sporadic one-offs by a stupid kid
by Iwanthelp
Fri Jan 27, 2017 3:47 pm
Forum: Abuse & Assault
Topic: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)
Replies: 49
Views: 18840

Re: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)

Figured I'd drop an off-topic bump rather than make a separate thread. One of the things in processing how she's been a possessive, controlling, pretty much abusive and belittling 'friend' has been remembering old stuff. Friends mentioning offhand that she just sort of acted like a 'harried mother' ...
by Iwanthelp
Thu Jan 05, 2017 10:07 pm
Forum: Relationships
Topic: I have a real boyfriend and an imaginary girlfriend
Replies: 3
Views: 1563

Re: I have a real boyfriend and an imaginary girlfriend

Its' not cheating (Like you said, they don't exist - it just qualifies as having a fantasy at this point), I recall doing something similar as a teenager and I think the driving force behind it is having a safe outlet to explore orientation or just...sexual/romantic whatever in general (I could type...
by Iwanthelp
Tue Nov 29, 2016 11:50 pm
Forum: Bodies
Topic: vaginal lightening
Replies: 6
Views: 2257

Re: vaginal lightening

Not really, sugar on the cooch = grounds for a yeast infection (Basically itchy-hell that makes your labia feel like there's scars on it which turns to "burny-hell" if you try and scratch it, 0/10 not recommended). One of the staff can cover the lightening thing better, almost 7 in the mor...
by Iwanthelp
Tue Nov 29, 2016 1:38 pm
Forum: Abuse & Assault
Topic: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)
Replies: 49
Views: 18840

Re: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)

Not really an update, a question I guess? Basically... If she tries to come at me or otherwise contact me/control me again/physically barr access what should I do? I don't know if she comes back to Scotland for Christmas, her familys' house is within walking distance of my house. She's physically st...
by Iwanthelp
Thu Oct 27, 2016 6:40 am
Forum: Abuse & Assault
Topic: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)
Replies: 49
Views: 18840

Re: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)

I don't think it's a thing that's came up in the group I'm going to, no. No manipulators that I notice/it's part time and casual so it'd be hard for them to entrench themselves in the way I'm thinking. Butyeah I should definitely bite the bullet and remove her as an admission that she's got to go. W...
by Iwanthelp
Thu Oct 27, 2016 6:08 am
Forum: Abuse & Assault
Topic: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)
Replies: 49
Views: 18840

Re: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)

Not much of an update - sometimes I'll just go quiet 'cause I feel I've got nothing more to say. Wall of text of thoughts ahead. The good: Recently gotten into an autism-related group which has been pretty good, I'm not getting close to anyone necessarily but I feel I can interact with the folk ther...
by Iwanthelp
Fri Oct 07, 2016 7:34 pm
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Questioning Relationship
Replies: 20
Views: 3871

Re: Questioning Relationship

That's still pretty suspicious to be honest, it wouldn't be hard to lie about an inability to use a webcam (that and it sounds like you managed to leave initially but he roped you back in?). What was the 'sexual behaviour' you asked him to quit?
by Iwanthelp
Thu Sep 29, 2016 7:11 pm
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Questioning Relationship
Replies: 20
Views: 3871

Re: Questioning Relationship

Google has a reverse image search feature, running images through that can show if a given picture crops up anywhere else - some people just grab pictures that aren't theirs to build a fake profile like that. Seconding that the video chat thing is a massive red flag, it's harder to fake a different ...
by Iwanthelp
Tue Sep 20, 2016 6:18 am
Forum: Abuse & Assault
Topic: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)
Replies: 49
Views: 18840

Re: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)

Some kind of social worker lady came in yesterday asking about groups I might be interested in. There's some autistic one for games so might get to see that in a week-ish, may hold my interest longer and fulfill the same 'ask people how they managed' niche? On another note, feeling kinda...weird, li...
by Iwanthelp
Sun Sep 18, 2016 12:46 pm
Forum: Abuse & Assault
Topic: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)
Replies: 49
Views: 18840

Re: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)

The other adults around me tend to handle paperwork so I'm not even sure half the time. Have/had a social worker, went to...some kind of autism meet-up thing but lost interest and stopped going, that was just for socializing. I'm on benefits but never exactly seen a bank account. I'm not sure the so...
by Iwanthelp
Sat Sep 17, 2016 2:23 pm
Forum: Abuse & Assault
Topic: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)
Replies: 49
Views: 18840

Re: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)

Oh yeah that's definitely a good idea. I'm probably gonna plan nerdy online stuff 'cause I've been slacking on the ingame group front and it's something I can be enthusiastic about, provides some purpose in that I'm bolstering something+having fun at the same time. Have looked at the article in bits...
by Iwanthelp
Sat Sep 17, 2016 6:03 am
Forum: Abuse & Assault
Topic: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)
Replies: 49
Views: 18840

Re: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)

Yeah, I don't think going with her is safe either so I've cancelled. Went as well as you'd expect. [11:27:07] me: I'm not going to England so just cancel/refund my ticket, it's too soon a time period for the argument to blow over and I don't trust you to be in a caretaker capacity without being cont...
by Iwanthelp
Fri Sep 16, 2016 4:19 pm
Forum: Abuse & Assault
Topic: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)
Replies: 49
Views: 18840

Re: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)

I think the ticket was booked alongside hers, eg we'd be in the same seat. There was a lot of prep before-hand so it's kinda a with-her-or-nothing deal, plus I was meant to be staying at hers. It's more organizing than I care to deal with short-notice and without the 'going with friend' aspect that ...
by Iwanthelp
Fri Sep 16, 2016 3:56 pm
Forum: Abuse & Assault
Topic: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)
Replies: 49
Views: 18840

Re: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)

With the trip...not really since my autism would be highly incompatible with that, the ticket was booked to go alongside hers in the first place 'cause my selfcare/navigating the adult world skills aren't at the point where I can take a train without another person there with me. I wouldn't feel rea...
by Iwanthelp
Fri Sep 16, 2016 2:33 pm
Forum: Abuse & Assault
Topic: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)
Replies: 49
Views: 18840

Re: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)

That's fair, my typing style is a bit all over the place and my articulation when I get upset flies out the window. Basically: I hit my head against a wall infront of her twice and she wants me to apologize for that. Someone selfharming in front of you = upsetting understandably but I'm hard-pressed...
by Iwanthelp
Fri Sep 16, 2016 12:41 pm
Forum: Abuse & Assault
Topic: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)
Replies: 49
Views: 18840

Re: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)

Reading the article in bits and pieces. Probably? I mean with the first I'll distract to the point I'll actually neglect bodily care/forget about it. The self harm probably files into acknowledgement but is always a bad idea. I don't feel confident she'd take explanations well, like I tried "I ...
by Iwanthelp
Fri Sep 16, 2016 4:30 am
Forum: Abuse & Assault
Topic: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)
Replies: 49
Views: 18840

Re: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)

Strategies might be good. I told the mum not to enable shit like her taking my computer away (The computer was in her car so I had to plug it back in and everything myself, the friend goes back to primary school friend but since I was disabled she took on a bit of a leading role but that's still per...
by Iwanthelp
Thu Sep 15, 2016 6:28 am
Forum: Abuse & Assault
Topic: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)
Replies: 49
Views: 18840

Re: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)

That makes sense. Thanks, feeling a bit less screwy today - I get pretty ugly when I'm pessimistic/angry so was worried I misbehaved in some of the lines I posted. Idk if that makes sense. Watched an anime for a break and the ending involved casting aside distraction/pretending coping mechanisms and...
by Iwanthelp
Wed Sep 14, 2016 12:24 pm
Forum: Abuse & Assault
Topic: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)
Replies: 49
Views: 18840

Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)

This is gonna be disjointed 'cause I hit my head off a wall twice and I suspect my brain actively wipes 'thing that happened in detail' regarding fallouts with this friend so I don't know how concise I can be. This is for clarity/answers to two questions: I've had a post here before (regarding a hom...
by Iwanthelp
Thu Sep 08, 2016 2:32 pm
Forum: Supporting Each Other
Topic: Called CPS and I'm now deeply worried
Replies: 14
Views: 4494

Re: Called CPS and I'm now deeply worried

Abusive people tend to go in cycles of bad behaviour to a honeymoon period where things seem good. Not saying that to crush your hope, just that if you still talk about what's going on to adults that's still valid.

Can't find what you're looking for? Try searching our old board archive or our main site.

Go to advanced search