Search found 91 matches

by Iwanthelp
Mon May 29, 2017 6:08 am
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Literally unable to move on
Replies: 6
Views: 3049

Re: Literally unable to move on

Part of recovery from a break-up involves taking time off from that person and getting used to not having them around. You're still in contact with him and receiving mixed messages from him (Saying he 'loves you dearly' after a breakup is...I'm sorry but that's incredibly reckless on his part, even ...
by Iwanthelp
Tue May 23, 2017 6:24 am
Forum: Abuse & Assault
Topic: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)
Replies: 49
Views: 18801

Re: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)

Coming up with a way or phrase would be helpful yeah. Sorry, just feeling overwhelmed by bullshit. (I don't think the Manchester news helped, I'm not near that area but between it being too close for comfort and taking place at a concert its' just...depressing)
by Iwanthelp
Tue May 23, 2017 5:59 am
Forum: Abuse & Assault
Topic: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)
Replies: 49
Views: 18801

Re: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)

Walking around outside helps, I suppose loitering in shops could be an option. I don't have an update on the list and truth be told, I imagine I'm so coddled half to death and lazy and incompetent from being coddled half to death by the same people that complain that I never do anything (Not on the ...
by Iwanthelp
Tue May 23, 2017 4:56 am
Forum: Sex, Culture and Politics
Topic: self-proclaimed 'trannies'?
Replies: 2
Views: 3530

Re: self-proclaimed 'trannies'?

'Tranny/Trannies' is a slur by the way. Are you trying to talk about crossdressers or trans people? I'm not sure what you mean by self-proclaimed, the individual is the best judge of that. I mean detransition is a thing but I can't think of any time or place where you could call someone 'self procla...
by Iwanthelp
Tue May 23, 2017 4:42 am
Forum: Sexual Identity
Topic: bi, straight orcurious
Replies: 6
Views: 4261

Re: bi, straight orcurious

Some folk have different body type/aesthetic preferences for different genders. Can be valid as bisexual even if you only like feminine dudes as well as girls.
by Iwanthelp
Tue May 23, 2017 2:58 am
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: is it wrong
Replies: 7
Views: 3153

Re: is it wrong

I...guess one of those is porn that hopefully just alludes to 18-19 year old characters? Where are you seeing the latter term? I've never seen that.
by Iwanthelp
Tue May 23, 2017 1:45 am
Forum: Abuse & Assault
Topic: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)
Replies: 49
Views: 18801

Re: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)

Just cataloguing bad things as they happen I guess. Last night sucked because the short version is the 'dad' raised his hand in a gesture threatening to hit. The long version is he kept bitching at me not to feed the dog with the food I had open, I was going to put it back, he thought I was just try...
by Iwanthelp
Mon May 22, 2017 4:20 pm
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Beyond pissed, the girl I asked out stood me up.
Replies: 10
Views: 3180

Re: Beyond pissed, the girl I asked out stood me up.

I hope you're able to work out alternate arrangements to meet 3:
by Iwanthelp
Mon May 22, 2017 2:29 am
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: is it wrong
Replies: 7
Views: 3153

Re: is it wrong

It depends what you mean I guess? "teehee i'm 18" = worth a conversation about 'why do people like the bare minimum age of adulthood as a porn trope?' but they're still adults at that point. Adult actors pretending to be teens as in teenagers as in 'not 18' = well...yeah, the actors themse...
by Iwanthelp
Mon May 22, 2017 2:15 am
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Beyond pissed, the girl I asked out stood me up.
Replies: 10
Views: 3180

Re: Beyond pissed, the girl I asked out stood me up.

Seconding the 'have a second plan' thing, personally I wouldn't give folk more than half an hour. And yeah, if you're not willing to be friends with her at this point its' alright, sometimes you discover you're not feeling an arrangement and panic about how to say so but keeping someone idle for an ...
by Iwanthelp
Thu Apr 20, 2017 6:08 pm
Forum: Et Cetera
Topic: ddl/lg
Replies: 3
Views: 3112

Re: ddl/lg

Its' definitely got its' problematic elements. I dunno, I'm somewhere in the middle where I wish detractors wouldn't call an activity with consenting adults 'pedophilia apology' since there's no actual minors involved (I mean, I should hope not) at the same time it feels kind of...I don't know if th...
by Iwanthelp
Thu Apr 20, 2017 5:45 pm
Forum: Abuse & Assault
Topic: Advice on dealing with a friend who sexually assaulted another friend
Replies: 3
Views: 5056

Re: Advice on dealing with a friend who sexually assaulted another friend

Honestly, you cannot realistically be friends with someone that sexually assaulted one of your friends. At best if you do so the message you send out is that it wasn't a real enough assault to count (You are kind of mitigating it by going into how poor C totally didn't know they were raping/whatever...
by Iwanthelp
Sat Apr 08, 2017 2:09 pm
Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
Topic: Is not masturbating harmful?
Replies: 2
Views: 1200

Re: Is not masturbating harmful?

Nah, you might feel sexually frustrated if masturbation is something you want to do but that's...about it? Its' not gonna physiologically affect you. Where did you get your info from? Sometimes teenage friends can be misinformed and pass that misinformation on a lot.
by Iwanthelp
Sat Apr 08, 2017 9:40 am
Forum: Abuse & Assault
Topic: Feeling Too Much At Once
Replies: 96
Views: 16090

Re: Feeling Too Much At Once

I don't know what's happened in the interim but I hope you're okay. I hope you're afforded more peace and what you need rather than the DHS' initial failing - I hope the report involved passing the details of that on because some of what they said was seriously, seriously failing you. You didn't des...
by Iwanthelp
Sat Apr 08, 2017 8:21 am
Forum: Abuse & Assault
Topic: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)
Replies: 49
Views: 18801

Re: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)

I'll keep the emergency room thing in mind - edited the post a bit because my brain is all over the place. Just terrified talking will backfire on me. Would it? Can suggest hotlines if you want, I should keep a backlog of numbers on hand in the event of shit flaring up too hard yeah. In a sense its'...
by Iwanthelp
Sat Apr 08, 2017 7:56 am
Forum: Abuse & Assault
Topic: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)
Replies: 49
Views: 18801

Re: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)

Can't remember. I did link this thread to a socialworker at one point. Am realizing with the brother-cocsa thing and others that this family is such a stupid lie. A horrible, stupid mistake of a lie where the mother is too ineffectual to effectively parent and would never, ever choose to protect me ...
by Iwanthelp
Fri Apr 07, 2017 10:32 am
Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
Topic: Introducing and demystifying sex for my 16 y.o.
Replies: 6
Views: 1260

Re: Introducing and demystifying sex for my 16 y.o.

What Redskies said aside, I just can't see a sexworker being comfortable with this? Sure, age of consent dips below 18 and even 16 in a lot of places but he's a kid. I can't see them wanting to take you up on this at all. Even if you do all of the research and don't press the issue its' just...sugge...
by Iwanthelp
Fri Mar 31, 2017 9:55 am
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Sex was NOT pain-free!
Replies: 7
Views: 1441

Re: Sex was NOT pain-free!

Might be worth looking into vaginusmus http://www.ohjoysextoy.com/vaginismus/ (nsfw link, the comics' had its' problems over the years but this entry is solid as far as I know). There's some articles on the whole size myth as well. http://www.scarleteen.com/article/advice/lets_let_this_be_the_last_w...
by Iwanthelp
Sun Mar 19, 2017 5:19 am
Forum: Abuse & Assault
Topic: Feeling Too Much At Once
Replies: 96
Views: 16090

Re: Feeling Too Much At Once

It's not too late - if it helps there's a link here about a woman accused of making false accusations except the truth came out in the end. It's really long to build up to that point of the story though https://www.propublica.org/article/false-rape-accusations-an-unbelievable-story If/when you do re...
by Iwanthelp
Tue Mar 14, 2017 1:15 pm
Forum: Abuse & Assault
Topic: Feeling Too Much At Once
Replies: 96
Views: 16090

Re: Feeling Too Much At Once

It 'feels like consent' because he's had years to groom you, since before you were a teenager. Brainwashing you into thinking you 'want it' is part of the pattern of rape and abuse, stockholm syndrome can quite easily be a factor since you're stuck in the same environment as him. Things like telling...
by Iwanthelp
Sat Mar 04, 2017 5:50 pm
Forum: Abuse & Assault
Topic: Feeling Too Much At Once
Replies: 96
Views: 16090

Re: Feeling Too Much At Once

I've sometimes found asking a relevant adult if they have an email and emailing them a thread link (or a brief version of what's going on) helpful for when I've not been able to speak in person. Putting it out there in case that comes up as an option.
by Iwanthelp
Thu Mar 02, 2017 5:34 pm
Forum: Abuse & Assault
Topic: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)
Replies: 49
Views: 18801

Re: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)

Doing better than when I first had the live chat (talked at mo about the contents, am alright with mods seeing logs if they aren't shared outside of the mod circle), paranoia still regenerates and tries to scrape up new things and there's some mood/drive drop going on. Easily agitated at people in r...
by Iwanthelp
Tue Feb 28, 2017 2:36 pm
Forum: Abuse & Assault
Topic: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)
Replies: 49
Views: 18801

Re: Can't process (Abuse/suicidal thoughts/self harm and arguments)

So this is something entirely unrelated to the rest of the thread contents but I'm wondering if it's possible to PM a site mod for advice/asking kind of conversations that may run lengthy. There's something I want to talk about privately that's gnawing at me but I'm not sure what venues are availabl...
by Iwanthelp
Mon Feb 27, 2017 6:29 pm
Forum: Abuse & Assault
Topic: Feeling Too Much At Once
Replies: 96
Views: 16090

Re: Feeling Too Much At Once

If it helps with feeling conflicted about him and reporting you could think of the discipline/behaviour angle - constantly doing horrible things with no consequence is not good for a person, because in the long run they'll become a worse person if that makes sense.
by Iwanthelp
Mon Feb 27, 2017 11:46 am
Forum: Abuse & Assault
Topic: Does this count as abuse?
Replies: 14
Views: 5555

Re: Does this count as abuse?

I'm gonna say it does count as abuse - if it was consensual nudism that would be one thing but she's forcing you to undress. That...completely defeats the point of nudism, forcing nudity just promotes shame surrounding nudity and isn't a lifestyle choice at all, it's extremely poor boundaries on her...

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