Not ridiculous at all! It's an important skill to learn, pushing through that nervousness and discomfort and starting those tough conversations anyway, but the nervousness itself is understandable.

The question of where/how to find a partner can be tough to answer; so much of the process of finding partners (whether someone is looking for one-time casual sex, ongoing casual sexual relationships, or long-term romantic relationships) is going to come down to the luck of running into someone with...

I'm definitely glad to hear you were able to start that conversation! I also struggle with this sort of thing, sometimes, so I know it can feel super intimidating.

It sounds like this most recent ex wasn't being as manipulative as the earlier ex was, but that some of the ways they communicated wound up being stressful or hurtful to you. Someone doesn't always have to be acting in bad faith to be incompatible; I think that can be a very painful thing to learn a...

Hi there Elias, welcome to Scarleteen. :) While it's normal to feel an occasional itch around the vulva, the same way any part of the body might have a brief itchy feeling at random from time to time, a persistent itching, especially if it's paired with sensitive or sore areas or an unusual smell, i...

I'm so glad to hear you're feeling better! Taking that time to enjoy your own company for a bit sounds like a wonderful plan. I hope your exams go well!

One thing that can be helpful, when talking to women or anyone else you feel tense around, is to come at the conversation from some sort of shared experience or interest. If you're meeting someone through a class, event, shared hobby, etc. that can be a topic to talk about in order to get a conversa...

I've really appreciated hearing from a lot of friends lately the general sentiment of "I get that communication right now is hard for a lot of us, please don't assume I don't like you if you don't hear from me and I won't assume that about you either; when we can reconnect again I will be so ha...

That does sound frustrating! It's certainly something you could bring up to a gynecologist just to be sure there isn't anything else going on, but since it doesn't sound like you have any other signs of a problem, you may just be experiencing some heavier-than-average (but otherwise normal) discharg...

I've found that I'm doing a lot less when it comes to gender expression, in a way that's been kind of a bummer for me; because I'm masked when leaving the house, and because I only get out for errands or walks and not really to go anywhere for fun or to socialize, I haven't worn makeup very much in ...

I do think the best way to find out what your boyfriend likes is to take things slow and get feedback from him. If I remember correctly, this will be his first time receiving oral sex as well, am I right? He may not know exactly what he prefers yet, so it's likely that the first time will involve so...

While "normal" isn't an easy term to define, when it comes to sexual preferences, being interested in reading about BDSM certainly isn't uncommon, and having that interest doesn't necessarily means you will need it in order to be turned on or interested in sex with a partner. A lot of peop...

I can understand why you'd be looking forward to your mom being out of the house for a while, but it sounds like her stress at being back in school might manifest itself in ways that will make things tense in a different way than having her at home all the times does. For now it might be best to foc...

It is online now! We are generally signed in and ready to go right at 2 but occasionally it'll take a minute or two.

It would be so nice if it was possible to forget or remove the impacts of trauma; it's so unfair that you have to carry this pain. Even if you aren't always feeling a lot of distress about the sexual coercion in your previous relationship, it sounds like the distress you do feel impacts your life qu...

I'm sorry to hear this is causing you so much anxiety! If it helps, while I can understand your worry and frustration here, I don't think what you've described is necessarily a sign you're dealing with vaginismus or some other serious problem. You could certainly check in with a doctor or gynecologi...

It can definitely feel overwhelming to experiment with a new sexual activity you haven't tried before; even if you're excited for it, some level of nerves or worry isn't unusual. I think it'll be good to keep an eye on that feeling; if you're feeling so overwhelmed by the idea that you're actively u...

What's going to make you the most aroused is really only something you can figure out through experimentation and experience, the same way you'd figure out what feels best during any kind of sex. Are there things you already like to do together that turn you on a lot? Anything you're really excited ...

I'm sorry to hear that you've been having so much anxiety about your health, lately. We really can't know what it is that you're seeing, and I think doing searches for information isn't likely to be super helpful for you, either; in general googling symptoms tends to just feed into medical anxiety i...

I'm glad you were able to start that conversation with him! Being able to have those kinds of open and honest talks about sex is so important.

Masturbation, even when it's very frequent, isn't something that will have an impact on your sensitivity in a physical sense, but if you find that you're masturbating the same way every time, changing up how you're masturbating or what sorts of sexual thoughts or fantasies you're engaging with might...

Having sex with another girl definitely isn't something to be ashamed of, but it sounds like you didn't actually want to have sex but weren't given the space or opportunity to say no or slow things down, and if that's the case, it wasn't okay for someone else to put you in that position.

If nothing feels great or comfortable right now, it's okay to let people know, if they ask about your orientation, that you're still figuring things out; I would hope that anyone hearing that would respect it and not push you for more until you're ready. I wonder if it would be helpful at all to do ...

I definitely hope the medication adjustment is a positive one! It can be frustrating to deal with med changes like that, but hopefully the end result will help you feel better. And I think it might be worth experimenting with taking a break from porn or anything else that makes it harder to find tha...

Have you been able to talk with them at all about this pattern of conflict and the friendship ending? When you reconcile and go back to being friends, what does that look like; are you discussing what happened before or just falling back into earlier patterns of socializing without talking about you...