Hi sky, How is everything? I think the last time you were around you were leaning into therapy to talk more about relationships and such? On your question here: At first, it can be scary if our partner has more sex or dating experiences than us, but soon enough it usually becomes clear that it doesn...

Hey there! The idea that comes to mind is connected to journalling and exploring "what if" scenarios by writing them down. The aim being to make a range of things feel imaginable... instead of the possiblities feeling narrow. This may or may not appeal to you, but here's what I'm thinking:...

Hi Regina, He might be hurt but it sounds like it would be honest of you to say that you don't want to get married. It is much easier to accept things when they are stated with care and honesty and reduces the hurt in the long term. I would also be careful not to blame his biology for your decision....

I did not know that about valentines day! Thanks, pretty interesting! ... I am pretty critical of traditions like that anyway. What I meant when I said dating can be better when you *don't* know is related to that. When people go in with a super precise image of who they want to date, exactly how th...

I see! Not feeling good enough for love is a horrible horrible feeling. I have no doubt you are plenty good enough for the right people who you could be dating! I also don't think there is anything to be ashamed of in having adjusted to taboos or fears that were around you at a certain time... We of...

It does, you can continue to take it at 10am.

No problem!

Hi Julia, I'm happy to say you can continue to take it at your most convenient time and expect it to be as effective as ever. The instructions on the packet usually say that if you take it within 12 hours of your usual time it has no impact on the effectiveness. Taking it at the same time everyday h...

Hi Dan! It sometimes just happens when people are experiencing pleasure or stimulation that they involuntarily pee themselves to some extent... what you're describing sounds a bit more like ejaculation fluid (clear, coming out in 'sprays') which while it might contain some urine, isn't thought to be...

Hiya! It sounds to me like through the past few years you've done really well at staying true to what you wanted (and didn't want) and what you were feeling at the time. I'm not hearing that you're somebody who has wanted to date or have a partner while liking the thought of it occasionally but are ...

Glad you feel like some of it is starting to become clearer, it makes lots of sense to me. I just want to be in a situation where I allow myself to be happy with a romantic partner rather than anxiously waiting for things to go wrong. That is a really difficult balance to strike. Especially when try...

Hiya, I wasn't really referring to Dani, but more the negative relationships feelings you were expressing, but also sorta dismissing. I don't think that feeling of mourning you mentioned in your first post is all that irrational; it can be really upsetting to feel like you might be losing something ...

I get the desire to maybe hold out for a future date when numerous factors might be better in the future. But it sounds like lots of your thoughts sound like you already feel like it's the beginning of the end. Personally I have learnt that when I get that feeling it is better to do the difficult th...

Hi booknerd! In terms of removal being painful... I think that sorta depends on personal preference, some people hate the idea of a skin incision more than the idea of an iud being removed, and some the other way round but it is worth remembering that it is something that might only happen once in a...

Thanks for replying to this Kurtis, that feels like some really good advice. I'm trying to think about if there's anything I can add. My main thought is to see if there are any general comforts that could lessen the impact of dysphoria, like any reducing outside stressers or improving the environmen...

Ahah, I should have guessed that, thanks.

That sounds like it could be helpful, if your comfortable with it, and might make it easier to start the conversation with him afterwards or spot any red flags.

I'm glad he's been good with boundaries otherwise! Have you talked about it more since it happened? For me it's still a little unclear what he meant by saying that "it would be too hard for him to hold back"... that sounds a bit like he's saying he can't control his own actions, which he t...

Hi again! It sounds like the type of approval you'd predict from him could be part of the problem! It's a strange type of homophobia when guys make women's relationships with eachother all about them . I don't think it'd be a bad idea to let him know this is something that concerns you. I don't thin...

Hi! I think it's possible that we never really can fully 'know' our bodies. Some advice on the topic is probably a little misleading or unrealistic. Many types of touch on different parts of our body aren't going to feel the same every time, and you're right, I am going to say the brain can't be sep...

Hi aaa! Welcome to the boards! This sounds like it's been tough. I know I'm pretty sensitive to these things too, and even if I know someone is simply expressing anger in very minor (non-smashy) ways, it still scares me, and is deeply unpleasant. They might be letting off steam in a socially accepta...

Hi Bikinksterboy! This is such a tough spot to be in, I think many many people have strained relationships with their parents when trying to establish independence. It can be very difficult for parents to allow or accept that their children have become adults, for a host of reasons... powerlessness ...

bikinksterboy wrote:umm, I started the thread linked, not Cassie. What is the "original thread" that's being referred to, then?

Cassie responsded to your thread with a new question about her own experiences so Sam split it off to be Cassie's own thread.

Hi Indi! Yep, it's very common, especially if you don't have a heavy flow for 'brown discharge' to show up. Actually that's just what blood looks like after a while; the iron in the period oxidises and results in the brownish colour. Lots of people also have a varied or inconsistent periods and it i...

Hi Crystal_River! That sounds like a great conversation to have had with your boyfriend. In personally don't think there's anything wrong with having some parts of your sexual more private than others, it makes sense to me that might be a slighly more difficult thing to talk about. It might take a b...

Hi Sky H! If you do a websearch of sexual health clinics they might and are likely to have a phone number or email address you can use to ask about privacy and getting hold of condoms. Local LGBT groups you can connect with online might also be a really good call! In terms of finding a good hiding p...

Hi Sky! I think it's worth exploring things even if they do 'sound' odd or unfamiliar... lots of us have the kinds of sex that might be considered 'odd' but that doesn't mean they are odd. People's actual sex activities are way more varied than we are led to think... and some things that are treated...