Search found 17 matches

by milkybarlife
Tue Nov 09, 2021 9:21 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: I think my partner is emotionally abusive
Replies: 11
Views: 583

Re: I think my partner is emotionally abusive

You're so very welcome, and I'm glad talking here has been helpful for you. If you want to update about this situation or ask more questions about it down the road, you're welcome to keep posting in this thread. Hi there, It has been over a month since this post, and about 50 days since I moved out...
by milkybarlife
Sat Oct 02, 2021 2:49 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: I think my partner is emotionally abusive
Replies: 11
Views: 583

Re: I think my partner is emotionally abusive

Thank you very much. This discussion has been helpful to me. I was wondering, if there are significant updates on this situation in the coming months, such as if I find myself in a confusing situation and need a second opinion, am I able to write it here on this post or should I make a completely ne...
by milkybarlife
Tue Sep 28, 2021 3:37 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: I think my partner is emotionally abusive
Replies: 11
Views: 583

Re: I think my partner is emotionally abusive

Yes, you pose good points. I’ll have to mull a lot of that over while I’m taking this time for myself. In my mind, I had the idea of having a deadline trying out that kind of arrangement which would, yes, effectively be almost no contact but still together. I wouldn’t tell him about it, but just so ...
by milkybarlife
Mon Sep 27, 2021 6:24 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: I think my partner is emotionally abusive
Replies: 11
Views: 583

Re: I think my partner is emotionally abusive

If there is a chance he can address and resolve his issues, I don't want to break up the relationship. I don't mind being distant, living without him etc. If I can help it, obviously I don't want to leave him. As I said in my first post, I love this person, and in my mind he's more than just those a...
by milkybarlife
Mon Sep 27, 2021 12:58 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: I think my partner is emotionally abusive
Replies: 11
Views: 583

Re: I think my partner is emotionally abusive

Thank you for such a thoughtful response. It is comforting to hear that I've done something right, since it all feels like chaos around me right now and I have no idea what I'm doing. To your question about whether there is hope that he'll change: previously what I had based my hope on was the fact ...
by milkybarlife
Sun Sep 26, 2021 12:55 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: I think my partner is emotionally abusive
Replies: 11
Views: 583

I think my partner is emotionally abusive

My partner and I (in our late twenties) have been together for 5 years and living together for most of that. Things in general have been great - our morals, values, life vision, humour, ways of thinking all align. We have chemistry, a good bond, both reliable people etc. We still laugh together. The...
by milkybarlife
Sat Aug 28, 2021 6:49 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Holding a grudge
Replies: 1
Views: 252

Holding a grudge

Hello, I have been with my boyfriend for over 4 years, we are in a serious relationship and live together, both late 20s. We get on very well, but early on in the relationship he did something that really upset me. If it wasn't for the fact that I hadn't drawn a clear line in the beginning of the re...
by milkybarlife
Tue Sep 11, 2018 11:17 pm
Forum: Et Cetera
Topic: I don't know what to do about this...
Replies: 1
Views: 2565

I don't know what to do about this...

Hi, I'm really sorry if this is so off-topic from the website but I have no idea where to ask, and I do frequent this forum often (even as a lurker). My partner and I moved into a new flat a few months ago, and we live in a big city so the place we were in before was absolutely terrible and surround...
by milkybarlife
Fri Dec 29, 2017 2:32 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Self-worth that isn't dependent on a man
Replies: 6
Views: 1489

Re: Self-worth that isn't dependent on a man

Hi Milkybarlife, I hope you don't mind me jumping in with a few thoughts here. I understand the hesitancy to attach a sense of purpose to you work or your career, especially when you fear that the attachment is to the idea being valuable rather than the work itself (which is a little bit what it so...
by milkybarlife
Wed Dec 20, 2017 7:23 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Self-worth that isn't dependent on a man
Replies: 6
Views: 1489

Re: Self-worth that isn't dependent on a man

Before anything else, I want you to put this new Kesha tune on repeat: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lXyA4MXKIKo Maybe for as long as we're having a conversation here, maybe for hours, or days, or even weeks. Trust me on this one. I think it may well be your perfect musical anthem/mantra right no...
by milkybarlife
Tue Dec 19, 2017 7:57 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Self-worth that isn't dependent on a man
Replies: 6
Views: 1489

Self-worth that isn't dependent on a man

Although this has happened with many of my exes before, it didn't matter then because at the time they truly were wrong for me. But now this same thing is beginning to happen with my current boyfriend and, as there is nothing fundamentally wrong with us, I am starting to realise a pattern - and my o...
by milkybarlife
Thu Aug 17, 2017 6:03 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Sexual Trust in a relatively New Relationship
Replies: 10
Views: 2886

Re: Sexual Trust in a relatively New Relationship

Glad Sam was able to help you think through some of this. If you want any help around initiating a conversation about compatible sexual values with your boyfriend, just say so. :) Thanks so much, Karyn! : :) That might be helpful actually, as I don't want to start a conversation in which he feels s...
by milkybarlife
Sat Aug 12, 2017 11:29 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Sexual Trust in a relatively New Relationship
Replies: 10
Views: 2886

Re: Sexual Trust in a relatively New Relationship

So, to make sure I've got this right, it sounds like a big part of what is bothering you about this particular type of porn is that it feels very intimate and "real," which makes it feel like he's forgoing something real (you) for something else "real" instead of another type of...
by milkybarlife
Fri Aug 11, 2017 5:24 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Sexual Trust in a relatively New Relationship
Replies: 10
Views: 2886

Re: Sexual Trust in a relatively New Relationship

Thanks for filling me in, that helped a lot. Before I say anything else, I want to note that if him continuing to watch porn is a dealbreaker for you, then it just is. Everyone gets to have their own limits and boundaries and wants and needs in relationships. Too, if you decide - today or next week...
by milkybarlife
Fri Aug 11, 2017 3:34 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Sexual Trust in a relatively New Relationship
Replies: 10
Views: 2886

Re: Sexual Trust in a relatively New Relationship

...Having written all that and with you asking specifically what I don't like about it - I realise that I actually would be okay with him watching other porn, if it involved like two people and not focused only on the girl. I don't find that as threatening, because I don't find that personal, and if...
by milkybarlife
Fri Aug 11, 2017 3:00 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Sexual Trust in a relatively New Relationship
Replies: 10
Views: 2886

Re: Sexual Trust in a relatively New Relationship

Welcome to the boards, milkybarlife. So, I have a couple of questions to start, just to help me get a better idea of what you might be needing here. You mentioned that if he was fantasising or watching porn about partnered sex in some way, you'd find that easier to understand: I'm wondering if he w...
by milkybarlife
Fri Aug 11, 2017 1:07 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Sexual Trust in a relatively New Relationship
Replies: 10
Views: 2886

Sexual Trust in a relatively New Relationship

I'm in a relatively new relationship - we have been together for 7 months now, but our relationship started after only 10 days of knowing each other, so the length of our relationship is also pretty much the same as how long we have known each other in general. We knew very early on how well we get ...

Can't find what you're looking for? Try searching our main site.