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Would you say it's closer to a hard bump or does it feel softer or fleshier than that?

Hi tshlacog, This sounds like such a rough situation, both for your partner and for you. They're clearly in a bad dysphoria spike, and it can be so heartbreaking to watch someone you care about be in the midst of that and feel like there's nothing you can do to help. I wonder, do you think it would ...

Hi Mixxes, Honestly, that reel sounds like it's trying to collapse a lot of things into one, and it's sort of missing the part where there can be a lot of diversity within healthy relationships (also, a lack of a spark is generally about chemistry or attraction, not attachment styles). I actually wo...

Hi dollparties, I'm so glad to hear you're doing better and have found someone who cares about and respects you! And there's no need to apologize for how you sounded in earlier posts; one of the rough things about unhealthy or downright abusive relationship dynamics is that people come up with all s...

Hi Cocopops,

Is what you're feeling on the sides of the vaginal canal, or is it at the back, top, or bottom?

Yeah, I think that distance might be the best call, especially if she's doing physical things that are only adding to that feeling of confusion or hurt. As far as staying friends with her goes, that's entirely up to you. For some people, saying things like "I can't get past your gender identity...

You're very welcome, I hope they help! And I'm glad to hear you already have some tools you use when you're feeling anxious; those can also be things to talk with your therapist about so the two of you can incorporate them into your strategies for managing your anxiety.

Hi Mixxes, Oof, I absolutely see why that left you feeling confused and crummy. It seems like she made a lot of big statements about her attraction patterns and desire not to have any kind of romantic or physical relationship and then threw in those comments about it not being definitive right after...

Hi Rubie, You know, something I've noticed is that plenty of people do have instances of sex that stick with them the way you're describing. What tends to vary is whether or not it was what they consider their first time (for a lot of people, their first time can be pretty underwhelming, so it's gre...

Hi Digdawg, Ooof, yeah, the process of trying to adjust dosages can lead to some seriously stressful moments while you figure out where the threshold is. I'm glad one upshot of the whole thing has been you taking steps to find some extra mental health support! As far as broaching the pregnancy anxie...

Hi Anonymous275,

If you were feeling a lot of sexual desire during that time, that could have led to actual arousal, which has all kinds of physical feelings that can go along with it. So it's likely that's what was causing those sensations you were noticing.

No worries! Since it's only happened today, I wouldn't say it's cause for concern. If you notice it's not stopping, or it matches with the warning signs in this article, then it might be time to check in with a healthcare provider: Honorably Discharged: A Guide to Vaginal Secretions

Ah, okay, thank you for that, I misunderstood! It's possible this is a side effect of plan B, but it's also totally normal to have instances where your discharge is a little odd without anything bigger being wrong. Did it only happen once? And has it been accompanied by any discomfort or pain of any...

Hi juliapf,

One of the common side effects of emergency contraception like Plan B is that it can cause some irregularity in your cycle. If you're on the pill, that can include when your withdrawal bleed comes. So that's likely why you haven't got a withdrawal bleed so far.

Got it. Do you think it's worth reaching out to your ex and talking about how you're feeling and what's changed and seeing how he's feeling in turn?

All those feelings you're describing are really common things people deal with after their first time having vaginal sex! If it helps to know, unless you tell them or they somehow saw you do it, people can't really tell you're sexually active, even if it feels like you're walking around with a flash...

You know, something we know about the first, or first few, times people have vaginal sex is that it can be kind of underwhelming. I really like how this piece dives into those feelings: Is THAT All There Is? . I also think recognizing that having a colored or more noticeable condom helps you feel mo...

Got it, it sounds like you have a pretty clear idea of what you do, and don't, want when it comes to treating this! You're right that there will always be some exceptions to general patterns of human sexual behavior. What we know is that most kids masturbate as part of the general self-exploration t...

Got it. I'm glad to hear that you have such a robust support system! It sounds like you're working with a specific diagnosis, and that you and your healthcare providers are discussing solutions (although I do have to say that it looks like surgical interventions aren't typically one of the go-tos, b...

Hi Miss June, Yep, if you're doing something that causes your breasts to move a lot, whether that's running or having sex, it can cause some discomfort even if you're on the smaller end of cup size. So, in the future it might be worth trying positions where you get less jostled. Do you want to talk ...

Hi NoraStar, So, the basic answer is: no. Sexual assault cannot change or influence the shape of someone's genitals, unless the person who committed the assault did something like cut them. But the shape of your genitals is determined by things like genes (and the shape and length of labia are often...

Hi Cocopops, Since it sounds like the bleeding is getting lighter/stopping, then I don't think it's necessary to check in with a healthcare provider in this case. And if you need any tools or information for how to have those conversations with your boyfriend, that's certainly something we can help ...

Hi skzly, Have you noticed yourself dealing with compulsive behaviors in any other places in your life, or is masturbation really the only place where you start without really wanting to or are unable to stop when you want to (I use "compulsion" rather than addiction when talking about iss...

Hi Miss June, From the sound of it, you didn't do anything wrong! When you're new to partnered sex, it can be hard to predict how much lube you'll need ahead of time, and if you didn't have any on hand to use that probably played a big part in it being uncomfortable to try and have intercourse. Find...

Hi needanswers, I'm glad this thread has been helpful for you! I do want to say that if you're noticing issues holding pee during other times (like the skipping incident) what you're dealing with may have to do more with your body's overall ability to retain urine rather than masturbation specifical...