Search found 6861 matches

by Sam W
Tue Jan 18, 2022 10:10 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Just need some reassurance
Replies: 150
Views: 3679

Re: Just need some reassurance

Do you have a sense of why those scenes made you uncomfortable? If you're thinking about being sexual, have you gone back to the post Heather made up-thread about the considerations you need to make about your physical and emotional health when being sexual? Do you feel ready to take those things in...
by Sam W
Mon Jan 17, 2022 1:12 pm
Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
Topic: Unwanted crush
Replies: 64
Views: 1428

Re: Unwanted crush

I'm glad I'm helping you feel that way! I know it can be tough to talk about the rougher parts of ourselves! I'm actually curious about that pattern you've noticed where you feel worse when you find someone to complain to about things. Do you feel that way because you feel like you're somehow doing ...
by Sam W
Mon Jan 17, 2022 1:06 pm
Forum: Et Cetera
Topic: Queer affirming therapist
Replies: 3
Views: 103

Re: Queer affirming therapist

That does sound like a promising lead! That's a good question about trauma informed care! So, yes, in theory all therapy should come from a trauma informed approach. But for a long time, a lot of therapeutic practices on both an individual and institutional level didn't really structure themselves t...
by Sam W
Mon Jan 17, 2022 8:55 am
Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
Topic: Unwanted crush
Replies: 64
Views: 1428

Re: Unwanted crush

Hi Theansweris42, It's totally okay to process or vent all those feelings here; sometimes it can be really helpful to just get everything out, even if it's jumbled. And honestly, you've been really responsive to our advice here, so even if we're not finding solutions right away, or you're still stru...
by Sam W
Mon Jan 17, 2022 8:31 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Am I doing this right?
Replies: 1
Views: 63

Re: Am I doing this right?

Hi Tessa707 To start out with, if what you're doing during masturbation feels good, then I'd say it's right in the sense it's the right thing for you! Something we often encourage users to do is to focus less on the "goal" of orgasm and more on just what feels good, since that tends to tak...
by Sam W
Mon Jan 17, 2022 8:19 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Feeling Uncomfortable Post-Orgasm
Replies: 7
Views: 230

Re: Feeling Uncomfortable Post-Orgasm

You're so very welcome!
by Sam W
Mon Jan 17, 2022 8:12 am
Forum: Et Cetera
Topic: Queer affirming therapist
Replies: 3
Views: 103

Re: Queer affirming therapist

Hi Raffles, Oof, yeah, I've noticed that some therapists will use "LGBT friendly" to mean "I won't tell you you're going to hell" and not much else. But, there are definitely some great Queer affirming therapists out there for you to find! One tip I have for looking for affirming...
by Sam W
Mon Jan 17, 2022 7:57 am
Forum: Sexual Health
Topic: On-time pill?
Replies: 3
Views: 142

Re: On-time pill?

Hi Space Egg,

With the combination pill, you have a twelve hour window before a pill is even considered late. So taking it at 2 when you'd usually take it at 9 isn't going to damage the effectiveness.
by Sam W
Sat Jan 15, 2022 11:35 am
Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
Topic: Light withdrawal bleed
Replies: 1
Views: 69

Re: Light withdrawal bleed

Hi Juliaho90, There isn't really a way to make a withdrawal bleed heavier. Like your period flow, your withdrawal bleed can be influenced by lots of things going on in your body. Too, it's not that strange that you're experiencing lighter withdrawal bleeds, because that's a possible side effect of b...
by Sam W
Sat Jan 15, 2022 11:32 am
Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
Topic: Guilty or not
Replies: 21
Views: 424

Re: Guilty or not

I totally get that feeling of being anxious for so much of your life that you kind of figure it's just a thing you'll always be able to handle. But I also know that a mindset like that means that anxiety can get to the point where it's messing with your ability to enjoy and go about your life withou...
by Sam W
Sat Jan 15, 2022 11:16 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Feeling Uncomfortable Post-Orgasm
Replies: 7
Views: 230

Re: Feeling Uncomfortable Post-Orgasm

It sounds like you've done quite a bit of introspection around this, which is great! I think it's really sound to recognize that a lot of the pressure you put on yourself and the things that make sex anxiety provoking are those feelings that you need to do it all "right." You may have seen...
by Sam W
Sat Jan 15, 2022 10:03 am
Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
Topic: Guilty or not
Replies: 21
Views: 424

Re: Guilty or not

I'm so sorry to hear that your family was dismissive about what happened, and I can absolutely see why that would make to hesitant to talk them, or anyone else, about what happened. We're happy to talk with you here, but I also think it would be worthwhile to seek out some resources specifically for...
by Sam W
Sat Jan 15, 2022 9:57 am
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: No Pleasure; Hear Me Out
Replies: 7
Views: 228

Re: No Pleasure; Hear Me Out

Hi Cassidy, That disconnect you're describing does make sense, and to me it's another thing that indicates some of this may be about depression and/or medication. That does sound really frustrating to have some arousal there but feel like your body is just not cooperating. Does it feel worth it to y...
by Sam W
Sat Jan 15, 2022 9:17 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Feeling Uncomfortable Post-Orgasm
Replies: 7
Views: 230

Re: Feeling Uncomfortable Post-Orgasm

Hi Bessie, It does sound like that night might have been a turning point for or an origin of those feelings. Do you feel like you have a sense of what made it so anxiety provoking? I ask because that could give you information on how to build spaces that feel right for you during sex or masturbation...
by Sam W
Sat Jan 15, 2022 9:03 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Think I have hot guy amnesia
Replies: 19
Views: 761

Re: Think I have hot guy amnesia

The tough thing about grief, including grief around things like lost relationships, is that it doesn't happen on a predictable timeline. And it tends to be gradual, like you'll look back suddenly and realize that you're feeling considerably better than when this all first came back to you. In fact, ...
by Sam W
Sat Jan 15, 2022 8:48 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Extreme shallow vagina. Is there something wrong with me?
Replies: 9
Views: 324

Re: Extreme shallow vagina. Is there something wrong with me?

It is! I think a sound next step would be to check in with a sexual healthcare provider for an exam and talk with them about some of the issues this is causing. Do you know where to start for accessing that kind of care?
by Sam W
Sat Jan 15, 2022 8:44 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Just need some reassurance
Replies: 150
Views: 3679

Re: Just need some reassurance

Hi Sky,

We can certainly chat about sexuality stuff! And I'm sorry to hear that money is making therapy trickier to access. Have you spoken to your therapist at all about that situation and asked if she has something like a sliding scale when it comes to fees?
by Sam W
Fri Jan 14, 2022 9:21 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Think I have hot guy amnesia
Replies: 19
Views: 761

Re: Think I have hot guy amnesia

I think you're actually already in the process of figuring out what you want, which is awesome! Something I'd actually recommend is to check out this article: Supermodel: Creating & Nurturing Your Own Best Relationship Models . When you go through that, what things jump out at you, either as thi...
by Sam W
Fri Jan 14, 2022 9:13 am
Forum: Et Cetera
Topic: Why did I have a nightmare about sexual misconduct??
Replies: 3
Views: 93

Re: Why did I have a nightmare about sexual misconduct??

You're welcome, and I'm glad it helped!
by Sam W
Fri Jan 14, 2022 9:11 am
Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
Topic: Guilty or not
Replies: 21
Views: 424

Re: Guilty or not

No, I would not call what you saw in the store sexual abuse. It can absolutely be distressing to learn that you're capable of harm (everyone is), especially when you're an abuse survivor yourself. But just because we're capable of hurting someone, intentionally or accidentally, it doesn't mean we're...
by Sam W
Fri Jan 14, 2022 8:59 am
Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
Topic: Unwanted crush
Replies: 64
Views: 1428

Re: Unwanted crush

Hi Theansweris42, Heather may have additional suggestions, but as someone who often falls into the "oh no ignore thoughts and refuse to admit they exist" when presented with time to recharge, I thought I could toss some in as well. I'm a big fan of crossword puzzles (other puzzles work too...
by Sam W
Fri Jan 14, 2022 8:35 am
Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
Topic: Guilty or not
Replies: 21
Views: 424

Re: Guilty or not

I'm glad my advice was helpful! Do you generally struggle with letting go of guilty feelings, or with the feeling that you must have done something wrong, even if the other people you're worried about tell you they're fine? When we're talking about sexual abuse or assault, an important component is ...
by Sam W
Fri Jan 14, 2022 8:28 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Masturbating reminds me I’m not like other girls
Replies: 6
Views: 209

Re: Masturbating reminds me I’m not like other girls

When it comes to referring to your own body parts, obviously you get to be the boss of what terminology feels the most comfortable. If you're curious, this article by a seriously awesome trans woman lists some commonly used terms that you might find helpful: https://www.scarleteen.com/article/bodies...
by Sam W
Fri Jan 14, 2022 8:22 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Extreme shallow vagina. Is there something wrong with me?
Replies: 9
Views: 324

Re: Extreme shallow vagina. Is there something wrong with me?

Hi Irissy,

Thanks for those details! When you touch your cervix, what you would describe it(the cervix) as feeling like?
by Sam W
Fri Jan 14, 2022 8:18 am
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: No Pleasure; Hear Me Out
Replies: 7
Views: 228

Re: No Pleasure; Hear Me Out

Hi CassidyG, This sounds so frustrating, doubly so given that you've been doing a lot to try and work out why it's happening. I do think it's worth bringing up these issues with a psychiatrist; Prozac and other SSRIs are more likely to cause sexual side effects than some other categories of antidepr...

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