Search found 6618 matches

by Sam W
Fri Sep 17, 2021 6:55 am
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Is this normal, or even right?
Replies: 9
Views: 249

Re: Is this normal, or even right?

Honestly, if you think trying to masturbate would create that level of anxiety about controlling it for you, then holding off on it is a sound choice. Too, choosing not to masturbate because the negatives outweigh the positives for you isn't really repression, no more than not wanting to engage in a...
by Sam W
Thu Sep 16, 2021 10:02 am
Forum: Abuse & Assault
Topic: Flashbacks during examinations
Replies: 11
Views: 199

Re: Flashbacks during examinations

Okay! These ones can act as starting points, and may also be ones that you and your midwife can use or reference together: https://rise.articulate.com/share/8Oo2-UGd5Jc5AyjV6rs5iyc4cf5tF88S#/, https://www.pennysimkin.com/shop/when-survivors-give-birth/ (this book came up in multiple recommendations)...
by Sam W
Tue Sep 14, 2021 8:06 am
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Masturbation
Replies: 3
Views: 72

Re: Masturbation

Hi Brennan8833,

To make sure I'm understanding right, is it that when you try masturbating it doesn't feel pleasurable? And when you've tried masturbating in the past, do you tend to approach it the same way every time?
by Sam W
Mon Sep 13, 2021 9:49 am
Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
Topic: So there's a guy...
Replies: 30
Views: 608

Re: So there's a guy...

The very late (or very early, depending on how you look at it) certainly makes sense given what you've shared about his schedule. In addition to reconnecting with him, have you been taking other steps to connect or reconnect with other friends you fell out of touch with (or people you're hoping will...
by Sam W
Mon Sep 13, 2021 7:44 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Masturbating as a pre-op trans woman
Replies: 26
Views: 418

Re: Masturbating as a pre-op trans woman

Most healthcare providers have heard people report all sorts of causes for their injuries, so if this doesn't go away it wouldn't be strange to be truthful with your healthcare provider.
by Sam W
Mon Sep 13, 2021 7:08 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Is my vagina too tight?
Replies: 3
Views: 138

Re: Is my vagina too tight?

Hi cyanolove,

I'm glad talking here was helpful! And it sounds like you and your boyfriend have really been communicating around all this, which is great to hear.
by Sam W
Mon Sep 13, 2021 7:04 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Masturbating as a pre-op trans woman
Replies: 26
Views: 418

Re: Masturbating as a pre-op trans woman

Hi Rubix, So, the perineum is home to the pudendal nerve, which means it can generate a lot of sensation when stimulated. However, that also means that it can become too sensitive when stimulated; similar to how someone may find touching the clitoris goes from pleasurable to painful because of how s...
by Sam W
Sat Sep 11, 2021 7:54 am
Forum: Abuse & Assault
Topic: Flashbacks during examinations
Replies: 11
Views: 199

Re: Flashbacks during examinations

It sounds like you're already doing an awesome job of setting boundaries around medical care when you need to (something that can be really hard to do, since most of us are taught just to do whatever the healthcare provider says), and like you're working with your midwife to try and lessen the flash...
by Sam W
Fri Sep 10, 2021 6:57 am
Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
Topic: So there's a guy...
Replies: 30
Views: 608

Re: So there's a guy...

Those are all awesome things to be proud of! I also feel like comparing you to your sister is extra-strange given the age difference; you two of growing up in wildly different social circumstances, on top of, you know, being unique people with different needs and wants. I agree that response suggest...
by Sam W
Tue Sep 07, 2021 7:18 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Can I get pregnant from this?
Replies: 1
Views: 115

Re: Can I get pregnant from this?

We will not answer ANY questions about pregnancy fear or anxiety in our direct services from users who are not pregnant or who are not or have not otherwise been directly involved with an actual pregnancy. Please do not post this kind of question. If you are seeing this text, and your thread is loc...
by Sam W
Tue Sep 07, 2021 7:12 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: question
Replies: 1
Views: 95

Re: question

We will not answer ANY questions about pregnancy fear or anxiety in our direct services from users who are not pregnant or who are not or have not otherwise been directly involved with an actual pregnancy. Please do not post this kind of question. If you are seeing this text, and your thread is loc...
by Sam W
Tue Sep 07, 2021 7:11 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Underlying fears
Replies: 0
Views: 129

Underlying fears

Hi aaru257,

Before you do anything else,I want you to read this article: You're Not Pregnant. Why Do You think You Are?.

Looking at that article, do any of the reasons offered feel like they apply to you?
by Sam W
Mon Sep 06, 2021 12:07 pm
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Is this normal, or even right?
Replies: 9
Views: 249

Re: Is this normal, or even right?

Thank you for all those details, and no need to apologize; we want users to be able to respond at whatever pace works for them. If you're thinking about easing back into masturbation, I wonder if it would help to treat it as you would any other enjoyable activity and set limits around it. For instan...
by Sam W
Mon Sep 06, 2021 11:19 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Is it internalised homophobia?
Replies: 3
Views: 64

Re: Is it internalised homophobia?

This is all really helpful background, thank you! Can you give me a sense of what kind of messages you grew up with around queerness, or what kinds of ones you tend to encounter now? For instance, are there lots of other LGBTQ folks in your social circles? I wonder if it would help to ask yourself s...
by Sam W
Mon Sep 06, 2021 11:08 am
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: I need some boyfriend advice
Replies: 5
Views: 84

Re: I need some boyfriend advice

Hi Knightness, I'm glad the article was helpful! I think sticking with the double method is a sound choice (and, honestly, the one we recommend to people for both safety and peace of mind). With condoms, it really depends on the brand (you'll see ones that market themselves a thinner that may also h...
by Sam W
Mon Sep 06, 2021 9:57 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Is it internalised homophobia?
Replies: 3
Views: 64

Re: Is it internalised homophobia?

Hi Helena, Ooof, it sounds like you have a lot of big feelings you're trying to sort through around this. One thing that may help is to separate your worries about being sexual with your friend from your more general feelings about your orientation. If it helps, what you're describing doesn't sound ...
by Sam W
Mon Sep 06, 2021 7:04 am
Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
Topic: Am I unlovable?
Replies: 3
Views: 162

Re: Am I unlovable?

Hi swimmingdino7, I'm so glad what Siân said was helpful! I do want to touch on what you said about friendships; it can really suck to have to say goodbye to friendships because they're no longer positive relationships for us. Do you have many opportunities in our life to meet new potential friends?...
by Sam W
Sun Sep 05, 2021 7:46 am
Forum: Sexual Health
Topic: Could sperm survive washing with water
Replies: 1
Views: 115

Re: Could sperm survive washing with water

Hi jpinkman, We will not answer ANY questions about pregnancy fear or anxiety in our direct services from users who are not pregnant or who are not or have not otherwise been directly involved with an actual pregnancy. Please do not post this kind of question. If you are seeing this text, and your t...
by Sam W
Sat Sep 04, 2021 7:57 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Masturbating as a pre-op trans woman
Replies: 26
Views: 418

Re: Masturbating as a pre-op trans woman

Hi Rubix, What you're describing sounds like a pretty standard amount of time to masturbate. Honestly, how long masturbation lasts really varies from person to person, and often for a given person throughout their life. Things like what kind of stimulation you're using, your energy level, even stuff...
by Sam W
Sat Sep 04, 2021 7:47 am
Forum: Gender
Topic: Pressure to come out?
Replies: 5
Views: 167

Re: Pressure to come out?

I can for sure see how it would feel strange! With your friend, is this someone you feel comfortable asking where he heard you're non-binary and explaining to him that you're trying to stay under the radar for now?
by Sam W
Fri Sep 03, 2021 8:45 am
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Is this normal, or even right?
Replies: 9
Views: 249

Re: Is this normal, or even right?

Hi AltAcct4Help, Before I jump into what you mentioned in this latest reply, I want to touch on something you said previously; that you think your father would be angry to know you've been abstaining from masturbation, and that he thinks you're a degenerate for not wanting to hook-up. Can you elabor...
by Sam W
Fri Sep 03, 2021 7:36 am
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: EROS
Replies: 7
Views: 230

Re: EROS

Hi Brunomag8, When you talk about recovering your desire, what does that desire look or feel like to you? Is it only sexual attraction? Is it encountering people you'd like to date? Something else entirely? And can you say a little more about why you feel like it's something you've lost? I will say ...
by Sam W
Fri Sep 03, 2021 7:24 am
Forum: Abuse & Assault
Topic: Flashbacks during examinations
Replies: 11
Views: 199

Re: Flashbacks during examinations

Hi Jess99, I'm so sorry that something that's an important step in looking after your health (and the baby's health) is also turning out to be a trigger for you. One of the roughest things about surviving assault is that your body can hold onto the memory in ways you don't expect, or hold onto them ...
by Sam W
Fri Sep 03, 2021 7:14 am
Forum: Gender
Topic: Pressure to come out?
Replies: 5
Views: 167

Re: Pressure to come out?

Hi Raffles, So, you get to come out or not as you think best, and if you're noticing the cons outweigh the pros, then it makes sense to not (I also totally get the need to pass as cis when your interviewing, especially in conservative areas). Being closeted comes with it's own kinds of suckiness, bu...
by Sam W
Fri Sep 03, 2021 7:09 am
Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
Topic: About cleaning lube out of you
Replies: 1
Views: 140

Re: About cleaning lube out of you

Hi blblblbl, You don't need to worry about actively cleaning lube out of your body, for a few reasons. One is that some lube will be absorbed into the skin (think about when you put something like lotion on your body; it doesn't all stay on the surface, our skin takes it in). And if there's excess l...

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