Search found 8830 matches

by Sam W
Mon Mar 18, 2024 12:37 pm
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Bored when masturbating
Replies: 3
Views: 54

Re: Bored when masturbating

You're welcome!
by Sam W
Mon Mar 18, 2024 8:41 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: 20 year old female, issues with masturbating and finishing for months
Replies: 7
Views: 1247

Re: 20 year old female, issues with masturbating and finishing for months

Got it. So, you're already doing one of the things I'd recommend, which is stopping masturbation when this happens since, as you said, there's not point in continuing if you're no longer enjoying yourself. If you want to extend pleasure prior to that throbbing kicking in, have you noticed if there's...
by Sam W
Mon Mar 18, 2024 7:29 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: 20 year old female, issues with masturbating and finishing for months
Replies: 7
Views: 1247

Re: 20 year old female, issues with masturbating and finishing for months

Hi PleaseHelpAsap,

To make sure I'm understanding you correctly, is it that the throbbing means a dulling of sensation? Or like it almost goes numb?
by Sam W
Mon Mar 18, 2024 7:20 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Why can’t I orgasm?
Replies: 3
Views: 123

Re: Why can’t I orgasm?

Hi Itsmemimsey, It does sound like you're likely getting "stuck" in the plateau phase of sexual response (you can read more about what that is here: Sexual Response & Orgasm: A Users Guide ),which can for sure be frustrating! During masturbation, what would you say your brain is genera...
by Sam W
Mon Mar 18, 2024 7:13 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Long cycle
Replies: 1
Views: 35

Re: Long cycle

Hi Yohanz, Period irregularity is really common, especially in the first few years of someone having it. Even just looking at the other cycle lengths, you can see that she's someone who has quite a bit of variation in the length of her menstrual cycle. So this in and of itself isn't cause for concern.
by Sam W
Mon Mar 18, 2024 7:06 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Dating, being taken advantage of and saying no
Replies: 1
Views: 50

Re: Dating, being taken advantage of and saying no

Hi Whispermae, I'm so sorry this guy was not only dishonest with you, but that you didn't feel safe during the interaction. You mention he had no idea due to you smiling and saying yes, but does your body language or movement change at all? I promise that this doesn't have to be how these interactio...
by Sam W
Mon Mar 18, 2024 6:54 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: I s**** up. I'm extremely scared
Replies: 1
Views: 47

Re: I s**** up. I'm extremely scared

Hi emmajones2, I'm sorry that this guy wasn't honest with you about his sexual history; that's a really crummy thing to do to a partner, especially if you're the one pushing to not use a condom. As much as you can, try not to beat yourself up for that choice; your partner withheld important informat...
by Sam W
Mon Mar 18, 2024 6:39 am
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Bored when masturbating
Replies: 3
Views: 54

Re: Bored when masturbating

Hi artistkitty, There are a few different things you could try. One could be to keep exploring different kinds of sexual media (for instance, maybe visual or auditory sexual media is more arousing for you than written media) and experimenting with different fantasies. I really like the advice in thi...
by Sam W
Sat Mar 16, 2024 8:16 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Is it bad that I am quite frustrated with Cisgender Gay Men?
Replies: 4
Views: 95

Re: Is it bad that I am quite frustrated with Cisgender Gay Men?

Hi Nat, Given the experiences you had, I can absolutely understand why this would leave you frustrated, and I don't think it's a bad thing to have that reaction to things that are, well, frustrating. Sadly, being part of the bigger queer community doesn't automatically mean someone will be understan...
by Sam W
Thu Mar 14, 2024 11:40 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Difficulty finishing
Replies: 5
Views: 152

Re: Difficulty finishing

Hi Lime_time, With masturbation, I think some of what you're experiencing is basically a learning curve; if this is all fairly new to you, you're still probably in the process of figuring out what your body and brain do and don't find pleasurable while masturbating. So, as you continue trying things...
by Sam W
Thu Mar 14, 2024 8:08 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: My boyfriend put it in raw for like 7 seconds but now I’m scared.
Replies: 5
Views: 141

Re: My boyfriend put it in raw for like 7 seconds but now I’m scared.

Got it. So, that's a combination pill, which means that there's a 12 hour grace period before it's even considered late, and a 24 hour grace period before it's considered missed. Taking one pill late isn't going to decrease the effectiveness of the method, so you can assume you still had protection ...
by Sam W
Thu Mar 14, 2024 7:48 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Sex positive but not?
Replies: 9
Views: 240

Re: Sex positive but not?

You know, if that's the case, then these might not be the group of people to talk about sex and related topics with, period. And that's okay! We all have things where we're only comfortable talking about them with a specific group of people or a specific person.
by Sam W
Thu Mar 14, 2024 7:19 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Feeling a lot of shame and sadness :(
Replies: 5
Views: 246

Re: Feeling a lot of shame and sadness :(

I think it's very insightful to have spotted that some of that fear you feel when other people show you affection or intimacy is tied to you not wanting to enact the same kind of discomfort on others that was done to you in the past. That's really common for people who have survived abusive or toxic...
by Sam W
Thu Mar 14, 2024 7:04 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: My boyfriend put it in raw for like 7 seconds but now I’m scared.
Replies: 5
Views: 141

Re: My boyfriend put it in raw for like 7 seconds but now I’m scared.

Hi Runmelon51,

Just to make sure I'm giving you the right answer, are you on the combination pill? Or are you on the mini-pill?
by Sam W
Thu Mar 14, 2024 7:02 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: I think I am omnisexual. Ways to figure out your Sexuality without being in a Relationship?
Replies: 11
Views: 383

Re: I think I am omnisexual. Ways to figure out your Sexuality without being in a Relationship?

Hi Demigirl, I'm happy to provide some starting places for those books! A few I like personally include the LumberJanes series, "Redefining Realness" (which is non-fiction but her romantic relationship is a happy one), and "Stage Dreams" by Melanie Gilman. This list from Autostra...
by Sam W
Thu Mar 14, 2024 6:43 am
Forum: Pregnancy and Parenting
Topic: Possible pregnancy?
Replies: 1
Views: 50

Re: Possible pregnancy?

Hi Trvllver, So, while it's possible to have a false negative (or a false positive) pregnancy test, taking multiple ones and having them all come back negative means you can assume that's the correct result. Too, someone who is pregnant will not get their period or their withdrawal bleed (if they're...
by Sam W
Tue Mar 12, 2024 11:19 am
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Masturbating as a trans man
Replies: 3
Views: 149

Re: Masturbating as a trans man

Blech, it can so suck to get a surprise dysphoria discovery! When we're talking about toys that are for external stimulation, those are toys that are designed to be used mainly or only on the outside of our genitals rather than being inserted into our bodies. Some trans guys report preferring those ...
by Sam W
Tue Mar 12, 2024 11:14 am
Forum: Sexual Identity
Topic: I am 23 and I haven't had any crushes yet
Replies: 3
Views: 132

Re: I am 23 and I haven't had any crushes yet

People do usually have celebrity crushes now and then, even if they haven't met someone in real life who inspires those same emotions. But at the same time, attraction is an odd beast, and for some of us it just happens less frequently than for others. It does sound like dysphoria is in the mix here...
by Sam W
Tue Mar 12, 2024 8:08 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Sex positive but not?
Replies: 9
Views: 240

Re: Sex positive but not?

I'm glad you feel comfortable enough to do that. Too, especially if you're not actively involved in a conversation, you're always allowed to get up or otherwise disengage from it (although if you're in class at the time sometimes you have to opt for ignoring them).
by Sam W
Tue Mar 12, 2024 7:36 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Sex positive but not?
Replies: 9
Views: 240

Re: Sex positive but not?

Bring generally shy can for sure add to that discomfort when people are talking about "taboo" subjects. Do you feel like you're comfortable redirecting the conversation when it gets to a point where you're not comfortable with the subject matter?
by Sam W
Tue Mar 12, 2024 7:11 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Sex positive but not?
Replies: 9
Views: 240

Re: Sex positive but not?

Hi Mika, It's pretty common for folks to be sex positive in general but still have some limits about where or with who they're comfortable talking about sex with. Do you think some of your discomfort might be due to your not wanting to think about friends in sexual situations? Or maybe that when you...
by Sam W
Tue Mar 12, 2024 6:45 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: I think I am omnisexual. Ways to figure out your Sexuality without being in a Relationship?
Replies: 11
Views: 383

Re: I think I am omnisexual. Ways to figure out your Sexuality without being in a Relationship?

I'm glad that using either fluid or omni works for you when it comes to describing your sexual orientation! Something I'll add is that, as you've noticed, how we describe our orientation is a little context dependent (including whether we think the person we're talking to will know a particular term...
by Sam W
Tue Mar 12, 2024 6:21 am
Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
Topic: How to get my mom to understand I'm not just in a 'phase'?
Replies: 2
Views: 96

Re: How to get my mom to understand I'm not just in a 'phase'?

Hi shigaraki, I'm sorry that your mom hasn't been supportive of your identity, and that she's trying to invalidate your experiences with your own gender and sexual orientation. We can certainly brainstorm some ways to try and have a useful conversation with her about all this. For starters, when she...

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