thank you very much! i’m really nervous for the intake call as i’m unsure what they’ll ask and what it really entails, so i’m going to have my partner with me as comfort. i just worry it will become triggering or graphic, i guess.

in a sense it’s nice to know that i’m not on my own in minimizing my own experiences, i think i was worried that it would be just me. that metaphor makes a lot of sense, thank you. i have an intake call this coming week and i intend on following through with the group. my partner is really happy tha...

absolutely no problem, i appreciate the response. :] i am okay at the moment but when i experience flashbacks it tends to trigger suicidal tboughts so i will definitely bookmark that link, thank you. i don’t know how i feel. on one hand i know he’s right but on the other hand i don’t want to accept ...

i think it’s in part a feeling of ‘it wasn’t that bad, so i shouldn’t be in spaces for survivors’. even though my partner insists it Was that bad and consistently tells me it was sickening what happened to me i just feel like it wasn’t bad enough to seek help. even if i get triggered to the point of...

my current partner is encouraging me to seek sexual assault specific therapy following my previous relationship but i feel as if i don't qualify for it despite knowing very clearly that i was raped. i have like... rape impostor syndrome though. i feel as if i made it all up and that i'd be accessing...

i survived! it was… an experience, though. thank you for your help.

oh, heating pad is a good idea, thank you! i do have one at home for my regular period cramps because they are so severe, i’ll definitely utilize it! i’m not sure what would help in the moment, but i’ll definitely bring it up to the person doing the insertion. i’m texting my boyfriend about it as we...

hey, i’m getting an IUD next week and i am… nervous. to say the least. i have a couple of friends who have IUDs and they walked me through the process of getting it done ( granted i was. ahem. not entirely sober, so i didn’t retain all of the information ) and it lessened the anxiety a bit, but i’m ...

i don’t really have a point here, i just want to reflect on my previous presence on this board. i was being raped and coerced by my ex ‘boyfriend’. the stuff i was posting about? almost nothing that happened was consensual, but i felt like if i spoke about it as if it was, i’d be able to regain some...

… oops. pondered on your response long enough that my period decided it had enough of a nap. lol :”) (this happens sometimes! the stakes just seemed a bit higher considering recent sexual activity. this was a good exercise in “not cutting somebody off because i couldn’t communicate with them”, thoug...

hi! i hope this doesn’t fall under a ‘pregnancy scare’ post- i am sorry if it does! i’m just wondering if i should tell my boyfriend about a missed period? i’d like to say, first, that my concern about pregnancy is extremely low. we use a condom every time, and even above that, i have circumstances ...

thank you! i struggle a lot with detaching negative feelings about a situation from negative feelings about a person, so this is an improvement for me. whenever i see him next i think we’ll talk about the other thing more, but i just hope it’s alright. :’) i worry!

hi sam! i am relieved that it’s out there, so that’s one less thing kind of weighing on me! i just wish i had gone about it in a better way. this isn’t me accusing sofi (or anyone on the boards) of bad advice or not supporting me enough, at all, i hope it doesn’t come off that way! it was just a spl...

update: i feel like a jerk! it wasn’t intentional, but it doesn’t really matter- i went about talking to him in a kind of crappy way. i’m on my period, so already i’m aware that i’ve been a bit more emotional the past few days, and we had a situation where we were both kind of upset. i had gone to s...

thank you! i haven’t had the chance to talk to him yet, we’ve both been busier than usual. it’s definitely new, i guess, to be in a more ‘mature’ or ‘adult’ relationship, but we both work full time and don’t go to college/university, so it is kind of just how it ended up working out. which is fine! ...

hi sofi! thank you for your response! i definitely don’t feel *obligated* to say it back, nor would i want to lie to him. he didn’t seem upset in the moment, more… concerned? i don’t think he intended to say it, really. what i had been saying to him was basically “i go home and worry myself sick tha...

(not lesbian(s)) (is it still cool to make bad movie references. i made the subject that just for my bad joke. sorry scarleteam.) hello again! another week, another dollparties predicament. my boyfriend this past weekend told me he loves me. we haven’t said it before, and he said it when i was expre...

absolutely! crappy past relationships kind of leave me waiting for the moment where i learn it’s not that they like me, it’s that they want sex(which isn’t necessarily a bad thing! It has just been a pattern of realizing that’s all someone wants without being upfront about it) or they pity me, or so...

thank you so much sam! having someone who does seem to like me and has never acted ashamed about it is very new to me, but not unpleasant. :) i definitely think in my head sometimes i am still waiting for the “catch” or the part where he goes “well, you’re actually kind of embarrassing/irritating”. ...

thank you for the kind response! i’m so glad that this worked out!
it was definitely kind of scary in the moment, but knowing this is something we now know how to avoid as best as possible is reassuring!

kind of a happy update to this one that i’d like to share! a week or so after this conversation, i got my pay from work, and picked up lube. i talked to my now-boyfriend(!!!) about it, and he said he didn’t know that it was an option, or that it would help a bit with the pain. there weren’t any hurt...

hi sofi! thank you so much for such a quick response (and my apologies for such a delayed one- i’m always working or with him nowadays :)). you’re definitely right, saying it’s up to him to decide whether or not i deserve how he treats me, and i don’t want to sound like i doubt his judgement. on one...

hello again! i feel like i should apologize for having so many questions to post about all the time. so i am sorry! my goal isn’t to overwhelm or be irritating. as for this post, i guess i wanted to ask for advice on feelings of being undeserving or unworthy of a relationship? while i’m not explicit...

thank you so much! this is honestly my first relationship where i feel comfortable being sexual with someone, and it’s been an adjustment to feeling safe enough to assert boundaries and discuss things. (a good adjustment, of course. :)) i definitely didn’t expect it to go so well, nor did i expect t...

hey! i hope you don’t mind me adding something- if you do, please don’t hesitate to ask me to delete the post. i never want to cross boundaries. :) as someone who has a few tattoos, tattoo artists and the people in the studio tend to be very kind and understanding people. more than anything, they pr...