Search found 59 matches

by Sofi
Tue Apr 13, 2021 9:04 am
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Another Ex and a lot of mixed emotions
Replies: 11
Views: 157

Re: Another Ex and a lot of mixed emotions

There are a few articles or advice columns that have helpful info; none are specifically only about romantic loneliness, but they touch on that subject. This one was written by Mo: Are relationships really as complicated as people make them out to be? This one is about being a lesbian and lonely, bu...
by Sofi
Fri Apr 09, 2021 11:55 am
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Another Ex and a lot of mixed emotions
Replies: 11
Views: 157

Re: Another Ex and a lot of mixed emotions

This definitely makes sense. It's normal for people to want to be single yet feel lonely, and miss things such as physical intimacy, both romantic and sexual. You know it's good not to suppress them, but it's also not good to act on them. Coping mechanisms (healthy ones) are important to keep under ...
by Sofi
Fri Apr 09, 2021 10:31 am
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Another Ex and a lot of mixed emotions
Replies: 11
Views: 157

Re: Another Ex and a lot of mixed emotions

Hi BuddyBoi21! I'm sorry to hear about the breakup, I know it had been something floating in the back of your mind for a bit but it was hard to make that final decision. My opinion is always that if a relationship doesn't feel all the way 'right', and you're having lots of doubts about it, it's not ...
by Sofi
Tue Apr 06, 2021 12:29 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Confused about sexuality and masturbation
Replies: 4
Views: 222

Re: Confused about sexuality and masturbation

Hi there, welcome to the boards! The good thing about labels regarding sexuality is that only WE can determine which ones to use. It sounds like you could certainly identify as queer or bi/pansexual, but if you feel like that doesn't apply, it's entirely up to you what to use instead. I personally f...
by Sofi
Mon Apr 05, 2021 3:33 pm
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Supporting loved ones while maintaining emotional boundaries
Replies: 2
Views: 75

Re: Supporting loved ones while maintaining emotional boundaries

Something I started implementing a few years ago, and have practiced more during the pandemic, is letting my loved ones know that if I don't have the emotional capacity to support them at a specific time, I will simply say so, with the promise to come back to them when I do. So when they come to me ...
by Sofi
Wed Mar 31, 2021 9:06 am
Forum: Et Cetera
Topic: Grew Out of it, but Trying to Process
Replies: 7
Views: 326

Re: Grew Out of it, but Trying to Process

I'm so sorry you dealt with all of that, especially at such a young age when being picked on matters a lot. You shouldn't feel gullible for not knowing your best friend was lying to you, that could happen to anyone and it isn't your fault! Also as a side note, arachnophobia is serious and people of ...
by Sofi
Sat Mar 27, 2021 8:42 am
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Aromantic but not by choice?
Replies: 5
Views: 169

Re: Aromantic but not by choice?

Hi there, I want to begin with a gentle reminder that labels for our sexuality exist to make things easier for us and provide space and community. They should feel like they fit, and provide comfort. If you don't feel that connection to a label (aromantic in this case), you don't have to use it and ...
by Sofi
Sat Mar 27, 2021 8:02 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: How can I break up with someone I care about?
Replies: 3
Views: 374

Re: How can I break up with someone I care about?

You're welcome! :D
by Sofi
Thu Mar 25, 2021 4:18 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: How can I break up with someone I care about?
Replies: 3
Views: 374

Re: How can I break up with someone I care about?

Hi there, welcome to the boards. I understand break-ups can be hard, especially with someone who is also a close friend. Remember you have to put your own well-being first, so as much as you're trying to avoid hurting her (which is good and a sign you do care!), you also need to take care of your ow...
by Sofi
Thu Mar 04, 2021 5:04 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: How to deal with feeling sexually exploited
Replies: 3
Views: 347

Re: How to deal with feeling sexually exploited

Hi Hedvig, I am so sorry to hear you went through that experience and are now feeling this way. I'm also super glad to hear your new partner is caring and respects your boundaries. You are definitely not damaged or dirty. It is, however, normal for people who have been through sexual assault or coer...
by Sofi
Wed Mar 03, 2021 10:57 am
Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
Topic: Am I too obsessed with my celebrity crush?
Replies: 17
Views: 971

Re: Am I too obsessed with my celebrity crush?

Hi belled, Honestly, I don't think this is "weird" or out of line. First of all, you are clearly aware of this being a crush and not an actual relationship, and also you're respectful of boundaries. Sure, you spend a lot of time thinking about her, but you respect her when you do talk to h...
by Sofi
Wed Mar 03, 2021 9:18 am
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Parent of gay 9 year old asking for advice
Replies: 11
Views: 709

Re: Parent of gay 9 year old asking for advice

Putting in my 2 cents: movies/TV shows. She might be a bit young for some of them right now, that's up to you of course, but as she enters her pre-teens and teens it's important she has access to a wide variety of Queer cinema. When I was younger, my parents wouldn't let me watch media that had same...
by Sofi
Wed Mar 03, 2021 9:01 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Period after 15 days
Replies: 6
Views: 414

Re: Period after 15 days

Honestly, I will suggest talking to your mom about getting a new healthcare provider, particularly a new gynecologist. It isn't recommended to have your own family member be your doctor, for several reasons, and in this case it worries me that her machine isn't working so you're experiencing a delay...
by Sofi
Thu Feb 11, 2021 7:54 am
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Polyamorous
Replies: 2
Views: 295

Re: Polyamorous

You're right, it's not fair to judge poly relationships or poly people. It's definitely 'normal' to want that, and isn't wrong at all. The importance here is that this must be communicated clearly to any and all partners. If you're not crystal clear about your wants and needs, it could easily lead t...
by Sofi
Wed Feb 10, 2021 10:04 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Birth Control Fear
Replies: 9
Views: 1223

Re: Birth Control Fear

That makes sense, and it's valid for you to want to be extra careful. It's good you're using double contraceptive methods, but it also means you should ease the anxiety over your mishap in September. You are doing great and are protected, so try to worry less about what happened back then!
by Sofi
Wed Feb 10, 2021 9:52 am
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Gay Energy
Replies: 3
Views: 249

Re: Gay Energy

I'm sorry you've been feeling targeted from several sides, for both your sexual orientation and your political views. I want you to try to ignore people who say things like "you emulate gay energy" because that is not worth giving your attention and time to. You don't have to lie to people...
by Sofi
Wed Feb 10, 2021 9:45 am
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Always Come Back
Replies: 10
Views: 453

Re: Always Come Back

You're not wrong that it might end up that way, of course it might seem like that to them. However, they might also appreciate you opening up and being honest and vulnerable in a way. You can make sure you reitirate that you're not blaming them for it at all, this is simply you sharing so they know ...
by Sofi
Wed Jan 20, 2021 10:34 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: STDs
Replies: 1
Views: 861

Re: STDs

Hi there, welcome to the boards. When you engage in physical intimacy involving genitals, especially unprotected sex specifically, there is always a risk of getting STIs. The risk exists even when you're in a relationship, and even if you're not having penetrative sex. That being said, always use pr...
by Sofi
Wed Jan 20, 2021 9:39 am
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Anxiety about potential relationship manifesting into a series of nightmares
Replies: 41
Views: 2405

Re: Anxiety about potential relationship manifesting into a series of nightmares

I want to invite you to consider being vulnerable with him and either letting him see you cry during your favorite episode, or even letting your friend tell him about some goofy things you two have done. Most times if someone likes you, they will not care and even will appreciate you being open and ...
by Sofi
Mon Jan 18, 2021 10:39 am
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Anxiety about potential relationship manifesting into a series of nightmares
Replies: 41
Views: 2405

Re: Anxiety about potential relationship manifesting into a series of nightmares

I understand being sort of 'weirded out' by our fantasies or desires, or ones we didn't realize we perhaps had, coming to life. However, what you're describing is definitely not weird or crazy, so I'm glad you enjoyed it and are glad it happened. I know you still have some reservations about it, is ...
by Sofi
Mon Jan 18, 2021 10:31 am
Forum: Et Cetera
Topic: How is Everyone?
Replies: 9
Views: 2417

Re: How is Everyone?

I'm sorry it's been hard, and you're not alone in feeling overwhelmed by 2020. Glad this thread is back to life. I hope you, and everyone reading this, have a wonderful 2021 <3
by Sofi
Wed Jan 13, 2021 11:30 am
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Toxic ex still haunts me
Replies: 13
Views: 1141

Re: Toxic ex still haunts me

If you're feeling hesitant, like maybe he's struggling more than he's telling you, it might be a good idea to give it another week or so (if you feel you're able to wait more). You can also ask him - something along the lines of, "I know things are tough right now so I don't want to add any str...
by Sofi
Tue Jan 12, 2021 6:38 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Unable to orgasm
Replies: 1
Views: 357

Re: Unable to orgasm

Hi Lozza223, and welcome to the boards! I want to start off by saying there is definitely nothing wrong with you and what you're experiencing is more common than you'd think. Now, I know that won't necessarily make you feel better right away, but I think it's important for you to keep in mind. To sp...
by Sofi
Tue Jan 12, 2021 5:00 pm
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Toxic ex still haunts me
Replies: 13
Views: 1141

Re: Toxic ex still haunts me

It's definitely a good idea to talk to him about it so it's not heavy on your mind anymore and it should ease a lot of the stress. Also, as you said, it's important he understands the 'why' behind some things that may affect him so that he can support you as best as he can. I want to give you props ...
by Sofi
Wed Jan 06, 2021 4:41 pm
Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
Topic: Sex drive in a COVID winter
Replies: 2
Views: 393

Re: Sex drive in a COVID winter

These are awesome suggestions! I tried some of these with my partner as well and they definitely helped. It also just helps knowing so many of us are feeling this way and are in this together.<3

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