Search found 63 matches

by Valerie J
Wed Sep 14, 2022 10:01 am
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Regret after past sexual acts
Replies: 1
Views: 2740

Re: Regret after past sexual acts

Hi greenergrass333, I read this post and one of your other more recent posts so I may be reiterating what others folks have already said. I have a couple questions. When you say you "feel regret at these actions in the past" what specific regret is coming to mind? Regrets of doing the acti...
by Valerie J
Thu Aug 25, 2022 11:21 am
Forum: Sexual Identity
Topic: Accepting my sexuality
Replies: 247
Views: 1509220

Re: Accepting my sexuality

Hi So it sounds like this conversation was pretty triggering for you which can lead to a lot of overwhelming emotion so let's pause for a moment and just take a big breath. I'm not sure binaries of right and wrong or good or bad may be helpful to you right now. So maybe let's just break down the con...
by Valerie J
Mon Aug 22, 2022 12:53 pm
Forum: Sexual Identity
Topic: Accepting my sexuality
Replies: 247
Views: 1509220

Re: Accepting my sexuality

Hi, Good to hear from you. I'm gonna bounce around paragraph wise to your response. I'm glad the idea of slowly pulling away resonated with you. Using specific examples, are there any current behaviors you feel like you could lessen that would start that process? Maybe texting less? You don't need t...
by Valerie J
Mon Aug 22, 2022 12:29 pm
Forum: Supporting Each Other
Topic: A long ramble
Replies: 38
Views: 27221

Re: A long ramble

Hi Raffles, There is no need to apologize you did not sound demanding. We appreciate that you expressed your frustration because it helps us help you better. I am really sorry to hear that the possible new housing has fallen through. That must be really disappointing and very upsetting. Is there no ...
by Valerie J
Mon Aug 22, 2022 11:58 am
Forum: Bodies
Topic: Vagina bumps
Replies: 3
Views: 3603

Re: Vagina bumps

Hi! There is still a possibility that those are ingrown hairs as it hasn't been more than a day since you last posted. If there is hair that grows near where you are talking about, like the mons, then there is possibility for ingrown hairs. I would wait a week or so and not touch them and see if the...
by Valerie J
Mon Aug 22, 2022 11:55 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Fingering
Replies: 7
Views: 1712

Re: Fingering

Okay well there's always a chance theres been a change in your menstration cycle that could lead to this bleeding. Are you having penile pentrative sex right now? Or has it just been fingering? Also, I forgot to ask a more important question, is this the first time you've used something pentratively...
by Valerie J
Mon Aug 22, 2022 11:38 am
Forum: Sexual Health
Topic: Std or not
Replies: 5
Views: 2711

Re: Std or not

Hi again. I'm really sorry to hear that you cannot share this with anyone - that sounds really isolating. It being itchy and painful indicates to me that this is something that really only a qualified healthcare provider can investigate, diagnose and treat. Would you like me to try to help find free...
by Valerie J
Mon Aug 22, 2022 11:30 am
Forum: Gender
Topic: Imposter syndrome on coming out NB
Replies: 3
Views: 2781

Re: Imposter syndrome on coming out NB

Hi! I want to start by saying congratulations on taking this step in your journey. This is huge and I hope you are giving yourself a much deserved pat on the back. I will say this, reading your post I had a very strong "oof. I feel that in my BONES." reaction. What you are feeling is unfor...
by Valerie J
Mon Aug 22, 2022 10:42 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Fingering
Replies: 7
Views: 1712

Re: Fingering

Is it still bleeding? Was it a lot of blood or more like spotting? Are you on any form of birth control? If so what? I cannot diagnose you as I am not a doctor and this is a messaging platform. If you want a specific answer I would recommend going to a gynocologist. It not being painful is a good si...
by Valerie J
Mon Aug 22, 2022 9:59 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Fingering
Replies: 7
Views: 1712

Re: Fingering

Hi! Generally, unless its coming from menstruating (is this a possibility?), blood is not expected in intercourse but it can happen. When you were doing this, was it painful? Did it feel forceful? I wanted to share this direct quote from our founder, Heather, who has spoken on a similar issue before...
by Valerie J
Mon Aug 22, 2022 9:43 am
Forum: Sexual Health
Topic: Std or not
Replies: 5
Views: 2711

Re: Std or not

Hi! I'm sorry you're experiencing discomfort! Let's just take a breath. I hear your fear and I want to let you know that if it is an STI it is not the end of the world and there is most likely medical care that can help with this issue. We are not medical professionals so I would recommend you going...
by Valerie J
Mon Aug 22, 2022 9:30 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Time period of painful clit after masturbation?
Replies: 1
Views: 7730

Re: Time period of painful clit after masturbation?

Hi! Irritation after masturbation is not uncommon. I don't have an exact answer to how long the pain should last. If it is still painful in the coming days it may be worth talking to a doctor about. Does it speficially hurt in your clitirous or do you have other pains (painful urination, vaginal pai...
by Valerie J
Fri Aug 19, 2022 2:12 pm
Forum: Sexual Identity
Topic: Accepting my sexuality
Replies: 247
Views: 1509220

Re: Accepting my sexuality

Hi again, Thanks for sharing all this - I can imagine that this has been extremely overwhelming. The first thing I want to address is the section you discussed talking about how you cannot see your friend being capable of being toxic or manipulative because she's an adult and because she has been th...
by Valerie J
Fri Aug 19, 2022 1:02 pm
Forum: Supporting Each Other
Topic: A long ramble
Replies: 38
Views: 27221

Re: A long ramble

Hi Raffles, I think I can speak for all of us here on the staff when I say we feel no desire to end this thread or any conversations with you. We all want to help in whatever way we can. Unfortunately, Heather isn't available to chat with you right now. But I was hoping, if you're down with it, you ...
by Valerie J
Fri Aug 19, 2022 11:53 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: withdrawal bleed part 2
Replies: 1
Views: 934

Re: withdrawal bleed part 2

Hi lycheefan, What sources are you talking about? Again, I cannot offer professional medical advice. If you have more detailed questions like this, this is a good time to reach out to a practioner. The advice I gave on the last post you made is the best proceedure when you have missed a pill. If you...
by Valerie J
Fri Aug 19, 2022 11:38 am
Forum: Sexual Identity
Topic: ace/aro, trauma or...?
Replies: 3
Views: 2807

Re: ace/aro, trauma or...?

Hello! Thanks for writing us. To start, I think it might be helpful for you to check out a few of our pieces on asexuality to see if it resonates with you. Just the Basics, Ace: An Asexuality Primer Am I asexual? Do you have a specific question or thing that you are "doubting" as you put i...
by Valerie J
Fri Aug 19, 2022 10:49 am
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Dislike of Partnered Sex?
Replies: 3
Views: 847

Re: Dislike of Partnered Sex?

Hi hi! Just wanted to pop in a resident person the ace spectrum to double affirm what that article wrote. Asexuality is a spectrum and like EVERY sexuality, it is not stagnent. Our desires and experiences can change over time and place, even person to person! When it comes to any and all labels, you...
by Valerie J
Mon Aug 15, 2022 2:59 pm
Forum: Sexual Identity
Topic: Accepting my sexuality
Replies: 247
Views: 1509220

Re: Accepting my sexuality

Hi! I just wanted to jump in to say a few things. One. I just read this entire thread and previous posts and what I can tell you from that observation is that all the moments you have labeled as "negative perspective of your friend" have been you re-telling us facts of things that occurred...
by Valerie J
Mon Aug 15, 2022 1:39 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: withdrawal bleed
Replies: 1
Views: 824

Re: withdrawal bleed

Hi there, I'm sharing an article that I know you've seen before but will highlight the parts related to your question. Combined Oral Contraceptives (The Pill) To use the combination pill properly, you need to take one pill every day, ideally around the same time of day every day. It's also important...
by Valerie J
Thu Aug 11, 2022 12:55 pm
Forum: Supporting Each Other
Topic: A long ramble
Replies: 38
Views: 27221

Re: A long ramble

Hi Raffles, It sounds like you have a lot going on. I wanted to take a moment to pause on your most recent reply. There's a lot of negative talk in absolutes, like saying you are "too messed up' to make "ANY posititve changes". Additionally, there's a bit of writing off of people bein...
by Valerie J
Thu Aug 11, 2022 11:54 am
Forum: Sexual Identity
Topic: Can I be a lesbian if I've loved a man before
Replies: 3
Views: 4412

Re: Can I be a lesbian if I've loved a man before

Hi! Just wanted to jump in and highlight how hard this situation is for you and how well you are handling it. Queer woman, or people percieved to be queer women, are constantly gaslit by society and often their close intimate circles about their own identies. It is so invalidating and can be super u...
by Valerie J
Thu Aug 11, 2022 9:49 am
Forum: Sexual Identity
Topic: who/what am I?
Replies: 7
Views: 3250

Re: who/what am I?

Hi Sam, Thanks for sharing all that. It sounds like you've got a lot of thoughts swimming around right now that can be very overwhelming. If labels are not sitting right with you right now, that's okay. Labels around sexuality or gender identity mostly serve as a reference point of understanding for...
by Valerie J
Thu Jul 21, 2022 11:00 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Fantasies about sex during summer (and friends next year)
Replies: 14
Views: 3048

Re: Fantasies about sex during summer (and friends next year)

Hi Estobawk! It sounds like a lot of emotions have been coming through lately that can be very overwhelming. Some of the things you discussed in the bottom paragraph sound similar to symptoms of depression. This might be worth bringing up with your therapist when you meet with him. I know you said y...
by Valerie J
Thu Jun 23, 2022 10:40 am
Forum: Gender
Topic: What brings you euphoria? A question for all!
Replies: 10
Views: 11843

What brings you euphoria? A question for all!

When talking about gender expression, especially in the trans commmunity, the topic of dysphoria often becomes front and centered. While dysphoria is an important topic and needed conversation, it can leave little room for conversations of euphoria. Recently, I gave a presentation with another trans...
by Valerie J
Thu Nov 18, 2021 11:59 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: I'm in a relationship, but I keep feeling unsure about it
Replies: 5
Views: 1642

Re: I'm in a relationship, but I keep feeling unsure about it

Hi! I'm so glad talking with Sam has been helpful. I wanted to pop in here and see if we can talk through some of what you're feeling. To start, this I don't think I'm a good person to fall in love with. is a pretty strong statement. I'd like to challenge that. "Good" implies that there ar...

Can't find what you're looking for? Try searching our main site.