Search found 23 matches

by CatHaru26
Fri Oct 23, 2020 2:03 pm
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Sex Hurts Really REALLY bad??
Replies: 13
Views: 702

Re: Sex Hurts Really REALLY bad??

Just wanted to give a little update for anyone who comes across this thread since its been about a month. I took the advice of having “lets see where this goes” sessions. Every time my boyfriend would ask if we’d have vaginal sex, I’d say “I dunno! Let’s see where this goes.” And about a week ago, w...
by CatHaru26
Tue Sep 22, 2020 3:35 pm
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Sex Hurts Really REALLY bad??
Replies: 13
Views: 702

Re: Sex Hurts Really REALLY bad??

I like the idea of that, it sounds a lot less pressuring than decided beforehand that the end goal is sex. I think when we hang out next I could definitely talk to him about that and give it a go.It definitely might take a few sessions of not trying to have sex until I feel totally pressure-free, bu...
by CatHaru26
Tue Sep 22, 2020 2:26 pm
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Sex Hurts Really REALLY bad??
Replies: 13
Views: 702

Re: Sex Hurts Really REALLY bad??

Hi Amanda, I really like the idea of trying to have him just go around the outside of me without actually penetrating. After our last session of trying didn't work, I did get on top of him and grind on him without wearing underwear and it did feel at least a little less scary now that I think about ...
by CatHaru26
Tue Sep 22, 2020 11:21 am
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Sex Hurts Really REALLY bad??
Replies: 13
Views: 702

Re: Sex Hurts Really REALLY bad??

I’m not totally sure! Sometimes I close my eyes right before he goes in, breathe and release all tension in my body but the second I feel his penis touch me down there I am instantly tense again. I guess maybe I could ask him to say/do calming things to help me out as he tries, if its not too much f...
by CatHaru26
Mon Sep 21, 2020 3:31 pm
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Sex Hurts Really REALLY bad??
Replies: 13
Views: 702

Re: Sex Hurts Really REALLY bad??

Yes that is exactly what I'm experiencing!! My anxiety is currently okay, but definitely last week I had a really bad patch of anxiety. I talked to my therapist about it and we've been working through it. I had some stressful life things going on as well. This whole situation also heightens both my ...
by CatHaru26
Mon Sep 21, 2020 9:57 am
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Sex Hurts Really REALLY bad??
Replies: 13
Views: 702

Re: Sex Hurts Really REALLY bad??

Hi Sam! Heres the thing. I did have a lot of anxieties, but I feel as though I did my best to move past them using your advice.We communicate really well now because of that so thank you. I was worried about pregnancy risk, we got birth control and condoms. I was worried about him only wanting me fo...
by CatHaru26
Sun Sep 20, 2020 9:34 pm
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Sex Hurts Really REALLY bad??
Replies: 13
Views: 702

Sex Hurts Really REALLY bad??

Hi!! I feel like I'm starting to become a regular on these message boards but if I'm being honest, I guess I just have a lot of issues regarding sex lmao. I was here in the past discussing an issue getting aroused/feeling pleasure. I ended up just taking a break from trying to be sexual with my boyf...
by CatHaru26
Sun Sep 13, 2020 7:36 pm
Forum: Sexual Health
Topic: Safe DIY Lubricants
Replies: 3
Views: 462

Re: Safe DIY Lubricants

When it comes to buying an actual lube, I wouldn’t even know where to start. I’d order it offline but I live with my parents and they just love to open packages without checking who they’re addressed to. I also don’t know which one to get. I tried doing some research and I figured I’d probably like ...
by CatHaru26
Sun Sep 13, 2020 2:52 pm
Forum: Sexual Health
Topic: Safe DIY Lubricants
Replies: 3
Views: 462

Safe DIY Lubricants

Hi! So I’ll keep this short. My boyfriend and I both have really bad anxiety about buying sexual products at the store (like, the only reason we have condoms is because they were given to him by his dad). But the first time we tried to have sex (using a lubricated condom, which we thought would be e...
by CatHaru26
Fri Jul 17, 2020 5:41 pm
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Can’t Feel Sexual Pleasure
Replies: 26
Views: 1604

Re: Can’t Feel Sexual Pleasure

Thank you!! That makes me feel much better. So we hung out yesterday and I was feeling slightly aroused (not fully, but i’ll work with it). When he tried to please me, I asked him to tell me to relax and he basically got the hint of what I wanted. It made it much easier for me to relax and although ...
by CatHaru26
Wed Jul 15, 2020 9:06 am
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Can’t Feel Sexual Pleasure
Replies: 26
Views: 1604

Re: Can’t Feel Sexual Pleasure

I think I could definitely give asking him for that a shot. It might be easier having someone else calm me down rather than trying to calm down myself at the same time if that makes sense.
by CatHaru26
Tue Jul 14, 2020 8:24 am
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Can’t Feel Sexual Pleasure
Replies: 26
Views: 1604

Re: Can’t Feel Sexual Pleasure

Yeah I agree!! She told me I was still young and that she would be concerned if I was over 25 and it was affecting my marriage or something. I kind of just assumed she knew what she was talking about since she was the doctor. Also thats definitely hard to say, since its hard for me to even tell what...
by CatHaru26
Mon Jul 13, 2020 6:20 pm
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Can’t Feel Sexual Pleasure
Replies: 26
Views: 1604

Re: Can’t Feel Sexual Pleasure

I decided it was easier for me to sit there and write my answers out so I could look at them. If you’d want to maybe skim them that’d be great, but I understand its quite a lot haha. If you see anything that might stick out it’d be great to know! • How is your general health right now? How is your s...
by CatHaru26
Sun Jul 12, 2020 8:48 pm
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Can’t Feel Sexual Pleasure
Replies: 26
Views: 1604

Re: Can’t Feel Sexual Pleasure

I also wanted to ask if you guys might know anything that might help me get aroused more often. I know that can vary from person to person so I understand if theres not a clear cut answer. We of course do lots of foreplay and have tried many different things. Even when I’m solo, the things that used...
by CatHaru26
Sun Jul 12, 2020 7:22 pm
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Can’t Feel Sexual Pleasure
Replies: 26
Views: 1604

Re: Can’t Feel Sexual Pleasure

Well usually we have TV on in the background but thats about it. We also stop to have small conversations every so often. I never try to do things when I don’t want to—and if I did I wouldn’t expect to be enjoyable obviously. Its just the matter of it not feeling good when I want it to.
by CatHaru26
Sat Jul 11, 2020 5:57 pm
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Can’t Feel Sexual Pleasure
Replies: 26
Views: 1604

Re: Can’t Feel Sexual Pleasure

I think theres a few things that alarm me when his face is that close to my area. Number one is because obviously growing up, that area is taught to be a private area for only me to look at, so the thought of someone else being there just gives me like a general anxious feeling. Number two is that w...
by CatHaru26
Fri Jul 10, 2020 5:31 pm
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Can’t Feel Sexual Pleasure
Replies: 26
Views: 1604

Re: Can’t Feel Sexual Pleasure

I think somewhere in the middle. If its just his hands down there I think I’ve gotten more comfortable with it. I definitely still get tense if he inserts a finger but thats also getting better with time. But with oral, for example, the idea of his face being down there still gives me way too much a...
by CatHaru26
Fri Jul 10, 2020 4:32 pm
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Can’t Feel Sexual Pleasure
Replies: 26
Views: 1604

Re: Can’t Feel Sexual Pleasure

Ahh thats great to hear and makes me feel a lot better about speaking to her about it. I always thought that I’d have to go to a specialized sex therapist but in my current situation I couldn’t do that without my parents finding out. Also yes, there are tons of nonsexual intimacy in which I feel alm...
by CatHaru26
Fri Jul 10, 2020 1:37 pm
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Can’t Feel Sexual Pleasure
Replies: 26
Views: 1604

Re: Can’t Feel Sexual Pleasure

I started going to therapy recently but we’re still in the beginning stages of it. Is it weird if I was to tell her about this issue?? I feel as though its out of her area.

Also thank you! I will read this as well
by CatHaru26
Fri Jul 10, 2020 11:07 am
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Can’t Feel Sexual Pleasure
Replies: 26
Views: 1604

Re: Can’t Feel Sexual Pleasure

Ooh that sounds great! I’ll definitely read that article. And spending less than $30 doesn’t sound too bad either! Thank you :) And yes I definitely do have issues quieting down my anxiety. Not so much with me as with him. I’m comfortable with him and all but of course me being me I’ll always find n...
by CatHaru26
Fri Jul 10, 2020 10:09 am
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Can’t Feel Sexual Pleasure
Replies: 26
Views: 1604

Re: Can’t Feel Sexual Pleasure

So you’re saying I should only do sexual things when I’m feeling aroused ? Sorry, I just wanted to make sure I read that correctly haha. And no I haven’t tried any kind of sex toy actually. I never thought they’d work for me since I couldn’t get off anyway and I didn’t wanna waste the money. I’m not...
by CatHaru26
Fri Jul 10, 2020 8:48 am
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Can’t Feel Sexual Pleasure
Replies: 26
Views: 1604

Re: Can’t Feel Sexual Pleasure

Oh no worries about the pandemic! We both have parents that are essential works and so the both of us are taking this pandemic VERY seriously to avoid spreading anything. We only see each other really and we’ve found a schedule that is safe and works for us! :) But yes I do easily feel pleasure when...
by CatHaru26
Fri Jul 10, 2020 8:15 am
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Can’t Feel Sexual Pleasure
Replies: 26
Views: 1604

Can’t Feel Sexual Pleasure

Hi! I’m 18 years old and have been dating a boy for a few months now (my first actually). We decided to bring sexual things into out relationship because honestly it just felt right. We talked multiple times about what it would be like and I was like “Yes!! I want that so bad.” Because well, I do! T...

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