Search found 38 matches

by Marisha
Sun May 02, 2021 2:44 pm
Forum: Relationships
Topic: my guilt is eating me up alive
Replies: 25
Views: 291

Re: my guilt is eating me up alive

all i know is that i wanted to tease him So, it sounds like you weren't trying to hurt him ... i did tell him about how guilty i felt and he did say that it was fine and that it really doesn’t bother him ...and he didn't seem to feel or express any hurt. Here at Scarleteen, we define sexual assault...
by Marisha
Sun May 02, 2021 1:24 pm
Forum: Relationships
Topic: my guilt is eating me up alive
Replies: 25
Views: 291

Re: my guilt is eating me up alive

Hi haikyufan123, I respect the fact that you're thinking about your boyfriend's comfort during sex. Tending to a person's needs and respecting their boundaries is just as important to sex as pleasure. I'm reading the words you've written - i think i accidentally kept going i stopped when he pulled a...
by Marisha
Wed Apr 14, 2021 4:20 pm
Forum: Abuse & Assault
Topic: Emotional Stessors Related with My Abusive Ex
Replies: 12
Views: 870

Re: Emotional Stessors Related with My Abusive Ex

Hi Jess99, Thank you so much for reaching out. I myself have struggled with sexual trauma, and just saying it out loud can itself be a huge hurdle. Congratulations on making it so far into your healing process, and good on you for prioritizing your mental (and overall) health. I have less than a han...
by Marisha
Mon Apr 12, 2021 4:04 pm
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Another Ex and a lot of mixed emotions
Replies: 26
Views: 631

Re: Another Ex and a lot of mixed emotions

I felt there was no point in having set standards or a "dating plan" What was the plan/"formulaic way"? I don't really know exactly what I can say I like because I feel like I'll never find it or it's unrealistic What is that "unrealistic" want? I should say, it's comp...
by Marisha
Mon Apr 12, 2021 2:48 pm
Forum: Bodies
Topic: How to make my breasts bigger? Please help!
Replies: 11
Views: 738

Re: How to make my breasts bigger? Please help!

Hi jenny01, Surgery can be really scary, not to mention have an inconvenient healing time :cry: I hope you have support during this time. I have to affirm what Heather said before. Being a young woman can be difficult in a culture that constantly tells us that we should look "beautiful," a...
by Marisha
Sun Apr 11, 2021 5:27 pm
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Another Ex and a lot of mixed emotions
Replies: 26
Views: 631

Re: Another Ex and a lot of mixed emotions

Hi BuddyBoi, I'm sorry to hear that you've had to go through all this, on top of the pandemic!! Quarantine has kept many of us away from our regular coping mechanisms, I'm sure. I hope that you've been able to connect with friends virtually, or been able to incorporate them into your bubble for the ...
by Marisha
Sun Apr 11, 2021 2:19 pm
Forum: Sexual Health
Topic: Higher sex drive causes?
Replies: 8
Views: 295

Re: Higher sex drive causes?

Hi Hel! As Mo wonderfully puts it in our advice column , "Some people are more comfortable initiating sex than others, and some folks enjoy the feeling of being asked more than they enjoy doing the asking; both of these things are okay. But when there's an imbalance of one person always initiat...
by Marisha
Sun Apr 11, 2021 1:56 pm
Forum: Sexual Identity
Topic: How to stop having so many thoughts about sex?
Replies: 3
Views: 241

Re: How to stop having so many thoughts about sex?

Hi Skylar, Would you say these thoughts are intrusive - totally involuntary - or is there something in your life/surroundings that brings them on? There are definitely ways to put a damper on these types of unwanted thoughts either way, but it's hard to put a stop to them completely, especially if t...
by Marisha
Sun Apr 11, 2021 1:26 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Confused about sexuality and masturbation
Replies: 4
Views: 439

Re: Confused about sexuality and masturbation

Hi Nia Ray, My reflex would be to answer your question with: "I don't know, you tell me." I think what I've noticed about users who ask questions about their sexuality is that they attempt to apply their behavior to a set definition. Unfortunately, however, we can't diagnose you with lesbi...
by Marisha
Sat Apr 03, 2021 5:23 pm
Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
Topic: Trying to getting to know my vulva after ignoring it for years
Replies: 7
Views: 551

Re: Trying to getting to know my vulva after ignoring it for years

Hi Elias,

No need to feel embarrassed :) I believe you mean the speculum. Good luck to you!!
by Marisha
Mon Mar 29, 2021 3:21 pm
Forum: Et Cetera
Topic: Grew Out of it, but Trying to Process
Replies: 7
Views: 696

Re: Grew Out of it, but Trying to Process

She also says that I shouldn't try to dwell on it too long since it was in the past. I do agree with her, but at the same time, it is a relatively new thing to process. Whenever I think about trying to 'get over' the things that happened to me in the past, I think 'dwelling' on the issue - thinking...
by Marisha
Mon Mar 29, 2021 3:14 pm
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Aromantic but not by choice?
Replies: 5
Views: 327

Re: Aromantic but not by choice?

You're very welcome! :D
by Marisha
Sun Mar 28, 2021 4:28 pm
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Aromantic but not by choice?
Replies: 5
Views: 327

Re: Aromantic but not by choice?

Hi KurtisC, So I'm in my thirties and all my relationships have been pretty abusive. I've not been with anyone for two years. This makes me feel pretty shit and I'm working on understanding that it doesn't mean there's anything wrong with me & I'm getting there. This really freakin' sucks!! I'm ...
by Marisha
Sun Mar 28, 2021 3:46 pm
Forum: Et Cetera
Topic: Grew Out of it, but Trying to Process
Replies: 7
Views: 696

Re: Grew Out of it, but Trying to Process

Hi Amthyst, I'm sorry to hear that you've had a family member deny that part of you. I've had that same thing happen between me and my mom, and can also relate to being able to talk through these things with my therapist. Did her saying this to you make you feel invalidated, or just bad/hurt in gene...
by Marisha
Sun Mar 28, 2021 3:26 pm
Forum: Sexual Health
Topic: Pain and Light Bleeding After Sex
Replies: 11
Views: 994

Re: Pain and Light Bleeding After Sex

Hi CatHaru26, Since you've described light bleeding and no pain during sex (unless you're already sore), I think it's safe to let it heal on its own while you and your partner take a little break and try other things. This will especially be good for you since it sounds like this is stressing you ou...
by Marisha
Sun Mar 28, 2021 3:08 pm
Forum: Gender
Topic: Do all fetuses start out with what would become a clit?
Replies: 1
Views: 436

Re: Do all fetuses start out with what would become a clit?

Hi KurtisC, Great question! So you're not exactly wrong, on both timeline and fetal development. But the external genitalia (and internal reproductive system) of a fetus is neither male nor female before the sex hormones are triggered. They resemble something in between, and certain structures that ...
by Marisha
Sun Mar 28, 2021 2:37 pm
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: How do I stop masturbating?
Replies: 5
Views: 534

Re: How do I stop masturbating?

Hi Skylar 7593, I'm really sorry to hear that you're feeling this way. I can personally relate to your struggle with feeling guilt and discomfort around masturbation, so I know what you're going through is tough. Let's see if we can talk this out, going in the order of your points: So first, I hear ...
by Marisha
Mon Mar 22, 2021 5:51 pm
Forum: Sexual Health
Topic: How do I ask...?
Replies: 13
Views: 522

Re: How do I ask...?

I hear that nervousness you're feeling, but I'm glad it's more of a good, 'first-time' nervousness rather than a bad kind of nervousness. Because you and your boyfriend sound like you're on the same page and are good communicators, I think you'll be fine. I totally agree with Mo! Because you're navi...
by Marisha
Sun Mar 21, 2021 9:42 am
Forum: Sexual Health
Topic: How do I ask...?
Replies: 13
Views: 522

Re: How do I ask...?

That's awesome that you and your boyfriend are able to take that time to process and talk things out with each other!

Glad to help, as always. Don't be afraid to come back to this thread if you want to talk through the experience.
by Marisha
Sat Mar 20, 2021 4:28 pm
Forum: Sexual Health
Topic: How do I ask...?
Replies: 13
Views: 522

Re: How do I ask...?

Hi Hel! It's good to hear that you and your boyfriend are making progress in exploring your desires together. Have the two of you had a chance to talk about those former experiences and what works for you? Is your boyfriend also thinking about ways to advance the conversation? If figuring out how to...
by Marisha
Mon Mar 15, 2021 2:21 pm
Forum: Et Cetera
Topic: Advice
Replies: 3
Views: 801

Re: Advice

Hi QU210054, Thanks for reaching out! What specific aspects are you looking for? I can absolutely recommend you some resources, including ones we have on this site, but I don't know that you'll find a site exactly like Scarleteen's for this topic because of its sensitivity. Hopefully we can find som...
by Marisha
Mon Mar 15, 2021 1:40 pm
Forum: Sexual Health
Topic: Washing hands before masturbation
Replies: 3
Views: 457

Re: Washing hands before masturbation

Glad to know my response was helpful : )))
by Marisha
Sat Mar 13, 2021 6:01 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: advice
Replies: 18
Views: 1513

Re: advice

Hi Edheraen,

Good luck! We look forward to hearing your update if you want to continue navigating this health journey with us!
by Marisha
Sat Mar 13, 2021 11:55 am
Forum: Sexual Health
Topic: Washing hands before masturbation
Replies: 3
Views: 457

Re: Washing hands before masturbation

Hi space egg! It totally makes sense to ask about this here. Let's talk about it! Washing your hands before masturbating definitely helps to prevent any unwanted substances from making contact with your genitals. I'm imagining an unfortunate scenario where a person starts getting intimate after eati...
by Marisha
Sat Mar 13, 2021 11:20 am
Forum: Et Cetera
Topic: Songs for Queer Love/Yearning
Replies: 3
Views: 655

Re: Songs for Queer Love/Yearning

I actually have a playlist with a ton of LGBTQ+ artists on it! Newbies like MNEK, Troye Sivan, Hayley Kiyoko, etc. I've also been getting into Dorian Electra, Rina Sawayama, Arca...(can you tell I like pop music?) But I also have a couple of songs in my back pocket that are meaningful to me as a que...

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