It was a high school party, everyone was handing me alcohol, and I just wanted to fit in.
I downed one shot, then two shots, then a beer, then two beers, until I had consumed more alcohol than words I was able to speak in my condition.
The music was loud in the back of my head, but the party had died down. There were four of us left, my best friend and two boys from our school.
After what seemed like only five minutes of dancing, my best friend and another boy from my school went into another room, and I was stranded alone in the room with a popular senior boy. But, I had reached my limit and fell crapulous-ly into the nearest bed.
I don't remember anything after that.
I woke up the next morning with a harsh hangover and a sore vagina. It couldn't have been what everything was pointing towards.
This doesn't happen to me. This couldn't have happened to me.
I eventually located the boy's number and called him to prove my suspicions wrong. But he admitted to having sex with me.
He even admitted to blocking the door with a chair.
Yet, he didn't seem to remember if he used a condom, and swore I was conscious. I spent the entirety of the next couple of days in tears. I was a virgin with morals, and in one night I was able to ruin it all.
I conceived a plan to fix all that I could.
He was eighteen, so I had him buy me "Plan B" (The Morning After Pill)... although he made me pay.
Then my master plan had one more part to it: I had to date him, abstain from sex for six months and then everything would be better.
We hung out the next weekend, he pressured me to have sex with him again, but I firmly said no. We even spent the night together and kept our sexual limit to kissing. I was thrilled! We kept this up for another week, he continued to pressure me, but I continued to refuse.
Then he suddenly stopped talking to me all together. He began to ignore me in the two classes we had together, then rumors started to spread.
Everyone was talking about our sex life, but they had it all wrong. I didn't have sex with him, he had sex with me.
He had sex with me.