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This site is amazing. I've followed many of the articles here and they've helped me alot throughout my questioning days.
But now, I've heard a lot about womens hymens being the maker and/or breaker of their virginity but in my case it wasn't. I lost my virginity to my boyfriend of 2 years a few days ago, and I didn't bleed like my friends told me I would. I had the tiniest spot of blood on my panties when I got home that night. My boyfriend is trying to question if I was a virgin or not to begin with, my friends are trying to say I must have had sex before. Now my boyfriend is starting to feel bad because he doesn't feel like he was "big" enough to break my virginity. I don't feel like losing my boyfriend because I might have a stretchier hymen that didn't need to be "popped".
How could I make them all realize this without sounding like a know-it-all pervert ??
Last summer ('06) I was pressured to sex by my former best friend. I kinda blocked it out and it's come back with full force now. I had a flash back when having sex with my boyfriend about a week ago and that was horrible! Any idea how I can cope with that?
And how do I cope with the feelings of guilt and shame. I really feel like the whole thing was partially my fault.. What happened was that we hadn't seen each other for a year cos he'd moved and when I came to visit we made out. He wanted to go further and I didn't. When I refused to go down on him he spiked me drink and made me do it when I was drunk. Unprotected. (Had STI screening since then, which was all clear...) I just feel like I could've somehow done something. Like keep an eye on my drink or say no more forcefully or just plain fight him off. I don't really know how to deal with this... I hope you can help..
Also, I was talking to a male friend the other day and he thought that men should have an option to legally not be fathers in case of a pregnancy. Like not be obliged to pay for child care and not be a part of the kids life whatsoever. I thought that this was ridiculous, but couldn't come up with any sound reasons why I though so.. It was just a general feeling. If this discussion comes up again what can I say?
I saw a porn movie the other day where this guy was doing his girlfriend while she was sleeping. Is that really possible?
For the past few months my period hasn't been normal. I'll go weeks or sometimes a whole month without it. I am currently in a relatively new relationship (about 2 months now) and we've had sex a few times, but he pulls out right before. I know about the risk of pre-ejaculate and such, but how possible is it to get pregnant from it? Also, I want to start using condoms and while I feel comfortable with him, since we've never brought it up I am bit apprehensive about mentioning it. How can I tell him that if we're going to have sex we need to use condoms? I know it sounds simple and it should be, I'm probably just stressing out about bringing it up over nothing. The thing is that we're both pretty religious people and while I'm more than happy with our sex life, I didn't expect it wouldn't happen so soon. So, the dilemma is do I mention the condoms? Or should we quit having sex because of the way deep down we know we should live and behave. I'm not in anyway saying I don't "want" to have sex.. but I don't know if having sex is the best thing for us now. And if it isn't, how do I go about telling him when we've had sex a few times? (I know this is definitely a personal problem for me, but if you were in my position.. what do you think you'd do?)
Another quick one, in my last relationship that lasted 4 years, my boyfriend who was 27 and I would have sex, either vaginally or orally, and he could only become aroused and ejaculate once. With the person I am with now (who is 31) he'll get aroused and ejaculate and an hour later he's ready to go again. Is it just different in every person? Thanks so much for your time.
My boyfriend and I have been dating well over a year and we have talked about getting married. He said that on the honeymoon he is not going to wear a condom. I, however, want him to because I don't want to get pregnant right away. I know that you won't get pregnant right away every time, but I don't want to take the chance. I have told him this, yet he still insists on not wearing one. Basically I'm asking how can I change his mind or get him to see it from my point of view?
Hey there. I'm a 20-year-old male and I've been in a long term relationship with my girlfriend for about 3 years and 6 months and well ... we still haven't had sex. As weird as it seem it had never been a problem for me. We are both virgins and well, I just love her enough to wait. We've been together since I was 17 and back then well, sex wasn't that big of an issue.
But now that I'm 20, with college and going out and stuff, it's really starting to hurt my masculinity. I feel stupid really because I feel like by know it shouldn't be a big deal and it bothers me that it only gets to me when we are around other people, or when I'm watching sex advice shows on TV, or even just regular shows were sex life is a big deal.
I just would like to know two things:
- How can I deal with this thing? I mean is there like .. . some mental yoga or whatever method I can use to just go back to not caring that much about not having a sexual active life (which I've wanted since I'm like 15)
- How can I explain what I feel to my girlfriend? She doesn't really understand what I go through.
I'll be waiting for your answer. THANKS!
I read through the checklist today and much of the "Material" items I do not have. Well, primarily the money. But since I live in a country where STD-testing is free 'till you turn 23 and very cheap after that and where abortion, pre-natal care and pretty much any health care you need is widely available and very cheap too, do I really need the money?
Another thing, do you have to use lube? Me and my boyfriend go without condoms (been monogamous since November last year..) and it feels amazing without lube...
A friend of mine is severely frightened that she might be pregnant, and I thought I would do a little research to help her out.
She recently had unprotected sex, but stopped halfway through, and neither party came. She knows that the risk there is pre-cum, and says that is why she is so frightened. Her menstruation cycle is not regular, sometimes she is 25 and sometimes 29, sometimes any number in between, but as she is getting closer to the day when she should start, she is freaking out. She thinks she is imagining the cramps, because they are not as strong as they used to be or not as long-lasting.
If she is pregnant, she wants to have an abortion. Her fiance is in the military and being deployed, and she wants to finish school. She is also very broke; where can I find information for her on free abortion clinics, or how to get help paying for an abortion? Her parents are very Catholic, and just recently disowned her because they couldn't all get along, so she has no emotional or financial support there. Any advice?