Sexual Identity

Big questions about gender identity, sexual orientation and sexual fantasy

Charlene asks:

(Firstly, let me compliment you on your wonderful site: though most people in my life are quite open and accepting, I have NEVER talked to anyone about sex or sexuality--except for the few conversations I've initiated. Information that is accurate, candid, and not colored with shame or guilt is completely refreshing.)

I'm 18, and have never had anything approaching sex--I've never even dated. I am a late-to-mature sort of person anyway, and though I have researched and read up on sexuality (like I do for, er, everything), I'm not overtly sexual or want to be at this point in my life. Plus, from the moment I learned what the word meant, I have identified as a lesbian: so the dating pool ain't big in high school.

I think I might be bisexual, but I really do not want to be.

anonymous asks:

I'm 17yrs old, not sexually active, never had a boyfriend (and I'm more than fine with it). Ever since my friend came out as bisexual, I've had this horrible feeling that I might be too. I've thought sexually about women for a few years now, and occasionally look at female porn. I just assumed this was normal, straight-girl activity, even though I don't think about guys as, um, graphically. Since my friend came out I've found myself attracted to certain women, not just sexually but romantically, as well as guys.

I just DON'T WANT to be lesbian or bi. I have no problems with them, but I don't want it to be part of my life. I'm terrified I'll have to acknowledge it - my family's loving but straight-laced and wouldn't accept it, for one thing, and it's just not the way I planned my life to run. I don't know how to explain it without sounding bigoted, but I don't want to deviate from the social "norm". I don't know what to do. Is there any way of...checking, some how? Is the Kinsey Scale accurate? Am I just imagining it since my friend came out?

Please tell me what to think, because I don't know what to do. Thanks in advance. I'm so glad for this website.

The Audre Lorde Project

The Audre Lorde Project is a Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Two Spirit and Transgender People of Color center for community organizing, focusing on the New York City area. Through mobilization, education and capacity-building, we work for community wellness and progressive social and economic justice. Committed to struggling across differences, we seek to responsibly reflect, represent and serve our various communities.

Iranian Gay & Lesbian Healthcare Providers Association

A professional organization with a mission to provide opportunities for gay/lesbian Iranian healthcare providers to network and unite, promote mental and physical health within the Iranian GLBT Community and challenge homophobia in the Iranian community.