Skip to main content
I feel a little weird asking this here because I'm 26 but I was waiting til marriage before sex so this is new to me, and everyone my age seems to have been having sex for years and I'm embarrased to talk about this stuff. This site has been a great resource for me so far - it has saved me so much embarassment of not knowing what's going on (especially embarrasing at my 'old' age!)
So I just got married about a month ago and have started having sex with my husband but it has been disappointingly unenjoyable. My expectations weren't super high because I know it takes awhile to get used to things. But before we were married we did other activities that I really enjoyed and I'd get turned on a lot. Now, however, those same things don't even turn me on anymore. From reading articles here I've realized that sex isn't going to be pleasant if I'm not turned on and it's not about me being 'too tight' or anything. My husband is making a lot of effort to be patient with me and to engage in a lot of foreplay, but it's not doing anything for me. I used to get really aroused by him stroking my nipples/clit areas, and he still is trying that beforehand. But I keep finding that I am not enjoying him touching me at all, and I just want him to stop. He tried oral sex too and I just did not like it, it felt so weird. I feel so horrible because he was so great about waiting til we were married (he has had sex before with his previous girlfriends) and I really want to share this with him now, and he is trying so hard but it's not doing anything. And I'm also really sad that I don't feel turned on because it felt so good and I don't want to have lost that! We are both frustrated, and I feel especially bad because he's had experience and I haven't, and he said he's never had issues like this with any other girls. Any advice as to how I can get more turned on, so that we can actually have sex? We've realized that we shouldn't attempt intercourse when I'm not getting into things, so I also tried pleasuring him in other ways but I'm finding that difficult too... it takes awhile and honestly my mouth/jaw get tired, and I'm worried about how to finish things (the spit/swallow debate). Right now I'm feeling like a terrible wife for not being able to pleasure my husband and also really missing the sexual pleasure I used to get. I don't regret waiting at all... but I'm impatient for things to improve and any advice would be hugely appreciated. Even just letting me know what's a normal amount of time that it takes for this to start being fun instead of stressful. Thanks!
Hi, I was recently treated for some sort of bacterial infection in the vagina with metronidazole pills that I took twice a day for a week. Toward the last couple of days of treatment, my discharge came out in long, oozing strings pretty much every time I sat down to go to the bathroom. It was pretty gross! I figured it had something to do with everything being cleared out, but it still lasted for a day or two after I stopped treatment. Now, I've been off of the antibiotics for nearly a week, and I'm still noticing a little bit more discharge than I would probably want. Is there kind of an adjustment period here? Did the medication not fully treat the problem...or did it cause ANOTHER one?
I have been with my boyfriend for about three months and I am not sure if I'm ready to have sex. How do you really know if you're ready? We have talked about sex before and he wants to do it but I'm just not sure if I want to or not. We have done other things and have also talked about those and if it felt good for us. It was just a little bit awkward talking about it with him at first, then I got more comfortable. He's not pressuring me into doing it, I just want to make sure I'm absolutely ready because I don't want to regret it.
There is another question I would like to ask. If you have been masturbating for quite some time (by rubbing my clit), and I mean a long time, will I only be able to get pleasure from rubbing or will having sex feel good too? I have read somewhere that you can get used to one thing and only be able to feel pleasure from it. My boyfriend has fingered me, it hurt a little at first but then it didn't. It's not that I hated it, but I also didn't get pleasure from it. I'm scared that I won't be able to get pleasure from anything else other than rubbing. Please help.
My girlfriend wants to have anal sex. Is it wrong that I don't want to, or should I do it because she said she will just go and do it herself?
I am a virgin, and I really want to lose it myself before I actually have sex because it is embarassing that I still have my virginity and i'm 18. But everytime that I masterbate or try to "pop my cherry" about like 3 inches into my vagina there is like a "sheet" of skin that is hard to push through, I am not sure if it is something you are supposed to push through, or it's my "cherry", I just don't want to hurt myself breaking something I am not supposed to.
I have been on birth control (ortho-cyclen) for the last 4/5 months. It has worked wonders in helping regulate my period, which is the main and practically sole reason I am on it. Now, my parents do not know I am on it because I chose to go to Planned Parenthood to get it. Now my mother wants me to go to a gyno and be put on birth control because she thinks I still have irregular periods. Works out great for me... I dont have to pay for it anymore, and she will then know I am on birth control. My problem is, is that I can not get an appointment until after I am already out of my birth control... which means I will have to come off of it and possibly be put right back on it 2 weeks later. Is that safe?
I've read your article on vaginal secretion several times but I'm still confused. All of my symptoms of my discharge point to normal except the smell. I have to constantly spray perfume (not down there) on myself because I'm afraid that everyone around me has to deal with this very strong smell, almost like urine. I'm not sure what to do. I try to keep clean in the shower and I'm a virgin so I don't think I have an STD but it's getting to the point where it is really becoming a pain and I'm so self-concious whenever I'm around people. Occasionally it will also feel like my vagina is just dripping wet. I look and there is some discharge but not enough to warrant feeling like I just had an accident. I can be walking around and then all of a sudden it just hits me. It's terrible.
Do I have some sort of infection that I need a prescription for or do I just have really bad vaginal secretions?
My girlfriend is having a rough time emotionally and that is leading to physical pain such as stomach and headaches. She wants to go to a doctor, preferably a gynecologist (in case birth control may regulate her hormones better) but her parents won't like that idea. If she goes will her parents find out through the doctor or insurance report? She's a legal adult so she should be able to take care of this stuff as her right but she still lives with her parents. Any help would be greatly appreciated.