Advice

Pregnancy Scared?

Worried you or a sexual partner might be pregnant? Evaluate your risk, find out what steps you may need to take next, check in with your feelings and by all means, breathe. We're here to walk you through it.

What's Sex?

It's obviously important if you're here for information that you know what we mean when we talk about sex, so we thought we'd make it clear.

My boyfriend got so angry at me when my first time hurt. Will lube fix it?

coco23 asks:

I am 24. I am a virgin. I tried to have sex with my boyfriend. We didn't use condoms. He tried to put it inside of me. I was in pain. He went in a little. I was feeling uncomfortable. He was so angry. I told him, I wasn't ready. He was very angry. He told me to get over it. He is so frustrated. Is there way to get over the pain? Does lube work?

Why did I wind up in dating abuse?

Sauce asks:

I am from a country where dating is taboo. I was not in a relationship till my early twenties. The following may be hard to understand but I need to talk about it and know why I let this happen to me. It was my first relationship and I had little idea what to expect. Things were fine till my bf learned another man was interested in me and I might be interested in him too. That was the first time he told me he loved me and wanted to marry me. A torrent of emotional abuse followed. He started to tell me things like I was fat (I was not...I was 5'3 and 113 pounds) and not as pretty as his exes. He tried to tell me what to do with my life and how I was not that intelligent. I tried to break up but he wouldn't let me.

I'm scared to touch my own vagina: why?

birthdaycake123 asks:

Hey. I'm 14 and I've never fingered myself. I've done other things, but the thought of fingering myself just seems gross. A couple times, I've tried to, but then I get to thinking about how gross vaginas are, and I chicken out. I know this is irrational, but do you have any advice on getting over this? Thanks.

He (mostly) seems nice online: should I meet him in person?

simonewheat asks:

I'm 13 and I really need some help. I have been talking to this guy for ages on my phone and texting him. We have Skyped, and I know he might be 'one of those older people who have random children acting for them and they have voice filters' etc, but he has Facebook and I know loads of people who know him, but I just haven't met him. He is really nice and we both wanna meet each other... We decided we were gonna meet and I'm really excited. He says he wants to finger me, and he want me to give him head, that's fine because I have done it before so all's cool. Then when he asked if I wanted to have sex with him, I got creeped. Just need someone to say if I'm doing the right thing or not.

On a Boyfriend's Porn, Anger, Healing & Finding the Way to the Healthy & Whole

dragonflyy asks:

This may get a bit vivid. Be warned. I have a twisted sexual history. After being molested at age 5 and again at 14 I somehow allowed myself to get taken advantage of and used in regards to sex. It took me many years to heal and much pain to get to where I am now and I can have a healthy sexual experience with my current boyfriend. I stayed at his house when he was renting a room out of a bachelors pad and I understood and accepted that Playboy magazines were on every toilet and the toilet seats were always up. One day he came to the kitchen with a boner kissing on me and whatnot, a short while after I went up to the bathroom where he had been showering and found a Playboy open. Are you kidding me? How dare he have the audacity to come to me with a boner he got from a slut in a magazine? It was talked about and made clear I am not comfortable with that whatsoever, he should be loyal to me mind body and soul, and I should be enough for him; as it is likewise.

It's been months since then. I found some porn videos on his phone yesterday and it really repulsed me. I get dressed up for him, I go down on him, I put out frequently. We do get kinky. Now the reason this video offended me so much is I do let him [ejaculate] on my [breasts]: its a thrill for him. In this porn video there's a girl who looks like me, disturbing enough as is, and shes giving a guy a blowjob till he [ejaculates] on her [breasts], then she turns to the next guy and does it again. Screen changes and she's [having intercourse] from behind and he [ejaculates] in her, then she crawls forward and starts giving another guy head as yet another comes up to [have sex with her] from behind as well. TOO FAR. It's not your basic porn scene, and it bothers me that its a twisted repulsive obscene image of something him and I share intimately. We've just moved in together and I can't imagine ever letting him see me naked again. I feel like he twisted our passionate and beautiful sex into some perverted expression of his twisted fantasies.

I want to have sex. He doesn't. Why not? And what do I do now?

beccaboo71 asks:

I've been dating my current boyfriend for 5 months now, and I really am ready and willing to have sex. But, he's not. He wants to, and he's curious but he feels that he shouldn't? I don't know what to do, I don't understand why he's feeling this way about it. Is there something wrong with me? Something he's afraid to say? Or is he just really scared himself? Help!

All About Condoms

Want to watch and find out how to use male and female condoms best in English, Spanish, Arabic, Russian, ASL and more?

Lions and Tigers and Orgasms, Oh My! When Orgasm Seems Scary.

jelsova asks:

I'm a girl and I've been with my boyfriend for 8 months. I'm 18 and he's my first boyfriend. We've never had sex (he has had it before) but we've done other things. I have a problem though, I'm really scared to orgasm. Like we'll be doing something that feels so good and I know that if we just continued a bit longer I would get there (I feel the muscles contracting, the heart pumping, the intensity building and all that) but then I chicken out and make him stop. He's fine with it and very supportive and respects that I'm so scared, but it bothers me. Why can't I just let myself get there? It's the same deal if I um, "pleasure myself." Is there any way I can or he can help myself get over this fear of the unknown?


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