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I have a question about anal sex. I hear from a lot of people that it's okay as long as your safe about it and consider health risks etc. But I've heard from many friends that it is shunned from society because it's just wrong to insert a penis there...that's where bowel movements are made! I've tried it once with my long time monogamous boyfriend of 2.5 years and it can be such a nice experience; just as nice as your first vaginal experience. I want to understand why it can be such a big deal...it would make me feel much better if I knew what was actually wrong with it.
I look at this way: if you've never tried sushi before, and you look at it and think that it's gross, you'll never try it. It's like that with anal sex. If you look at it and you've never tried it before, you might think it looks gross or isn't a nice experience...but you'll never know unless you've tried it. Is that in anyway close to how I think about it? I wanna know why it's such a bad thing! THANK YOU!
During my teens while cleaning my private parts I indulged in shaking and by doing that I got the sensation and slowly and steadily white fluid used to come out. Due to that I used to stammer a lot while speaking and my hair had become half. But I had stopped and started to recover but but still I used to do it once or twice a year. For last one year I had not done it and saw personality improvements in me. Now I am about to get married, will it have any effect in my conceiving. Please, it is very urgent.
Ok I have a few questions. I’m 18 and have been with my boyfriend for about a year and have not been sexually active with him or anyone else in any way (no oral, hand jobs/fingering, or sex). I have fun making out with him, but he recently told me that he doesn’t want to make out heavily anymore because it isn’t turning him on as much anymore without the “big O at the end”. Is this normal? I sort of want to do more but feel a little uncomfortable. My bf is supportive of my limits (especially he since he didn’t lose his virginity till he was 21) and isn’t trying to force me or anything but still really wants to do more. I love him and I want to do more but am nervous. He is much older and much more experienced than I am. I have talked to him about being nervous and stuff and it has helped a little but not a lot. I have another question too: I have a LOT of clear discharge when we make out and dry hump. Is this normal? I feel nervous about letting him finger me because of this. I am also nervous about giving him a hand job and oral because I don’t know what to do after he ejaculates. It all just seems very messy. I feel like I don’t know enough about how to get into and out of the sexual situation… I feel ready but just too nervous to go on… Is there something that I can do that will make this more comfortable? What can I do? Please help!
P.S. Thank you so much. This site is amazing.
I'm 18, and my girl and I have been going out for a year and we have just recently become sexually active so I have a few questions.
1. Is it okay to use spermicidal lubrication,or a spermicidal condom, because I did research and it may harm my girlfriend. I definitely don't want to do that because I truly love her.
2. We've tried anal, and once I ejaculated inside her anus, is that ok? Every time I try anal it hurts her, how do I make it feel good for her? I don't use lube, and I am very careful, and hate seeing her in pain.
3. Is it ok to use water, spit, or saliva for lube to go in her butt?
4. when I eat my girls vagina she really likes it, but I want to get maximum stimulation, how would I do that?
5. Is it ok to have anal sex or will that mess her intestines up at all in any way? I just want to make sure it's safe, okay, and won't harm the love of my life.
My girlfriend and I care about each other very much. recently we had decided to become sexually active. She has had previous partners though she was my first. She says that I satisfy her, though I have honestly told her she does not satisfy me. I told her it doesnt matter but she is very upset and I am myself bewildered. How can I not enjoy intercourse? Especially considering its a new and exciting experience?
My girlfriend came home from a party. I wasn't with her. When she got home we went to bed. Neither of us have intercourse because of our beliefs. We do "fool around." She wanted me to stimulate her as usual which involves inserting my finger in her vagina. Normally, it's relatively for lack of a better term tight. This time her opening was wide open. Open to the point the I could have inserted 2 or 3 fingers. This was not a normal thing for her in the time we've been together. Is it possible that the opening was like that because of penetration of something else, say a penis? I never said anything to her about it but I'm concerned.
And Butterflyeye asks...
Can a guy tell how many sex partners that you've had judging by the tightness or lack thereof in your vagina?
I am 28 years old and got married four months ago. Both my husband (29 years old) and I were not virgins before marriage and had both been with two other people before we started dating each other. We made the mutual decision to abstain from intercourse until marriage for religious reasons and to be "right with God" this go around. We dated for two years by the date of our wedding. During that time we would engage in foreplay, oral sex and we enjoyed that. I always wanted to fool around more than him and I made that known while we were dating, but he would always say that it was too difficult to get that worked up and have to stop. I had to agree, so I learned to become patient.
As the relationship went on and we got engaged a year and a half in, during our six month engagement we started having less and less foreplay. As our wedding day approached I became increasingly more excited about FINALLY being able to have guilt free, passionate, fun sex. I would say things like, "I can't wait!" and "how often do you think we'll have sex?" and "We will be able to have sex anywhere in the house and anytime we want" etc. I intentionally said this to express how excited I was about having sex finally. He would respond that he was looking forward to it too but that he didn't know how often we would because he couldn't make statements about part of our relationship that didn't exist yet. He would even get uncomfortable when I would talk about orgasms, something that I've only had real success with achieving with the aid of a vibrator. So the wedding night came and there was no passion, no romance, no "making love" just sex. I thought as least he would take me out of my beautiful dress, NO he just stripped and hoped into the shower, then wanted to have sex in the shower for the first time, Not my vision of my wedding night I'd waited for for two years. The honeymoon was the same. When we do have sex it lasts about 5 min. We've never had spontaneous sex or morning sex or after a fight sex.
He says now he's just not that sexual of a person and I feel betrayed and let down that he didn't express this before we promised to spend the rest of our lives together. He has trouble getting and sometimes keeping an erection and I become frustrated when he turns me down for sex. I've heard of girls not being interested in sex, but never a guy. He just is not into spontaneous, passionate, fun, sex. I'm not even sure he knows the difference. I have had great sex in the past, the kind I can't wait for, but with my husband, it's not exciting and he doesn't even get turned on my sexy lingerie. He is not interested in going to the doctor to take something for his occasional impotence. At best we have sex once a week. I was expecting that "newlywed sex" like rabbits that everyone seems to talk about, is that just a myth? Please help!
Hi. I have been going out with my girlfriend for about a year. Actually we have this commitment thing going and we really love each other. The thing is that she feels very uncomfortable talking about sex related topics or even talking about kisses. I kind of get frustrated sometimes but never let it out because I understand. What I actually want to ask is how can I make her talk about sex? How can I end this uncomfortableness in her? Please know that she fully confides in me and truly trusts in me as well. Your help will be really appreciated. Thank you.