sexual

Am I asexual?

thewitty1 asks:

I'm 17 years old and discovered the asexuality link on this site and I fit it really well, I feel safe to say that that website is the best thing that ever happened to me. But I'm not completely absent of sexual feeling, I just don't act on it. I sometimes feel like I really want to, but I talk myself down cause I tell myself it's not necessary and I don't act on my sexual impulses cause I don't like them and I think they're weird. I never get turned on by a person, just by a song or a scene in a book, but I never masturbate cause I don't want to and I've never really done anything with a guy. I wonder if I still feel the impulse if I'm asexual? I asked the asexual website but no one answered my email so I'm asking you. Am I a unique case? I also really like to kiss people, I think kissing is the best ever and I kiss lots of people of both genders. Am I still asexual? I really want to know, thank you.

I don't want to masturbate or have sex: what's wrong with me?

Anonymous asks:

I am celibate and a virgin. I don't masturbate. I think all forms of sexual activity are ok as long as people say safe and respectful, and this includes masturbation. I was never abused. I was brought up in a very open environment, where my parents never shied away from answering any kind of question about sex and answered very honestly and frankly, and never said anything was "sinful" or "shameful." And when they couldn't answer, both me and my siblings were pointed in the direction of good resources. There are plenty of things that "turn me on." I fantasize if I'm very horny but I wouldn't call that masturbation, and it's never that "graphic" in my head, it just "gets me off." I don't like watching others have sex either, like on tv or movies - I enjoy seeing people kiss or dance much more and think that is actually way more erotic!

MY QUESTION IS THIS: is there something wrong with me?

Can people with no sexual experience have an STD?

Laura E asks:

If both the people involved in having sex have had no previous partners of any sexual nature, is it safe to presume they don't have any STDs?

Is it racist to only feel attraction to my own race?

Anonymous asks:

A friend of mine told me I was a racist because I'm not attracted to people who aren't of the same race as me. I don't really know why this is, I'm just not attracted to them. My friends are from many different backgrounds so I don't think that I am a racist. Is it weird to only be attracted to people that are the same race as me?

(Wo)men Speak Out

An organization dedicated to eradicating rape, sexual assault and gender violence which seeks to educate both men and women, cultivating healthy relationships and gender equity.

Was my friend implying I brought my rape on myself?

Jessica asks:

I have been raped on several occasion throughout my youth. I am just now, as a 22-year-old woman dealing with these. My friend recently said to me, "Well since it happened to you once, then you are more susceptible to it happening again." It really offended me to hear this, and I wanted to know if it seems unfair to me to get upset. My whole thought process is, I already blame myself (and I know I shouldn't but what girl doesn't) why would you say something like that implying that I brought this on myself? Is that insensitive of me to feel that way?

I was molested on an airplane: was it my fault?

Amsinha asks:

When flying on a plane back to New York I ended up sitting next to a man who had the wrong idea about me. He started out by complimenting me but the moment I lay down to sleep he started kissing me and feeling my breasts and ass sexually without my consent. This happened the day after I turned 18 and he made two very obvious attempts to engage me in something I wasn't into and didn't want. When I returned to my seat after a while the guy noticed that I was pissed and began talking to me about his reasons, one of which was that he asked for consent and that I gave it to him. I don't remember his asking or my consent partly because I was in a state of half asleep and listening to my ipod on maximum volume. The two of us had four seats to ourselves which I used to push him away from me after the fact, however throughout the rest of the flight and the last few days I have had a nagging feeling in the back of my head that I somehow told him it was okay even though it felt completely wrong and one sided.

Sexually harassed at work: what should I do?

Kayla asks:

There's this guy at work who keep hitting on me. At first it seemed like innocent flirting but it's gotten downright vulgar and creepy. He's 15 years older than me. I'd like to remain friends with him, if possible but he seems to think that when I turn 18 it will be okay that he says completely inappropriate things in the workplace. I'd rather not file a complaint but I will if I try everything you tell me and it doesn't stop. A friend also suggested that I drop his girlfriend a line through email letting her know what's going on. I think that would be kind of mean and may even make him violent. He's really pushy so it scares me a bit. I'd like to know how to convey to him to knock it off without hurting his feelings or getting anyone else involved.

I need more than looks to know if I find someone attractive: what does that mean in terms of my orientation?

Holly asks:

I've noticed that I never really feel sexually attracted to anyone solely on the basis of how they look. I can find people aesthetically attractive. I'm not asexual, though-- I CAN be sexually attracted to people, it's just that I can't be particularly attracted to anyone unless I know what their personalities are like. So, my question is whether I should be considering myself bi, gay, pan, or... what. I realize that this may not be entirely the right forum for this question, but I seriously don't know anywhere else to ask.

I thought I'd wait until marriage, but I've changed my mind.

Anonymous asks:

I am 21 years old and am a virgin. I am currently single, but I had a boyfriend in high school and part of college and we never actually had sex, but did everything leading up to it. A part of me always felt like I wasn't ready to be having sex with him even though I was attracted to him. Maybe it was because I was so young then. I always thought I would wait until marriage to have sex, but I also always thought I would be getting married quite early in my life (around 22 or 23). Now I have realized that I have no desire to get married that early, but I don't want to wait until I am in my upper 20's to experience sex. I recently met a guy who I get along with quite well. We are able to communicate very easily and I also find him attractive. He is from another country and is quite experienced sexually, and we have talked about this before and about how I am a virgin. I have been having thoughts about losing my virginity to him if something were to happen between us. Right now we are friends, and not in any sort of relationship, but that doesn't bother me. I am not wanting a boyfriend right now. My question is whether losing my virginity to him (if the opportunity arose) would be a bad idea? I feel as though I could trust him with that part of myself and I feel like I would be okay with us remaining friends afterward. I have not mentioned any of this to him, as 1) I am not sure how to go about it and 2) I don't know if he is even thinking anything like this. Any thoughts, help would be appreciated!


Please notify us of any offensive or inappropriate ads

Information on this site is provided for educational purposes. It is not meant to and cannot substitute for advice or care provided by an in-person medical professional. The information contained herein is not meant to be used to diagnose or treat a health problem or disease, or for prescribing any medication. You should always consult your own healthcare provider if you have a health problem or medical condition.