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sex ed

Toy Queries

Tokenqueen asks:

If I get an IUD can I use a vibrator?

You Can't Test for Virginity

Tammyluvgurl asks:

Hello I'm 13 and don't plan on having sex but my mother says that when I'm 16-18 she is going to get me checked to see if I'm still a virgin because I'm religious and we believe in no sex till marriage. Even though I don't plan on having sex, does masturbation affect the test the doctors going to take? And how do they take this test? Because I don't want to masturbate and find out the doctor says I'm not a virgin. Is there even a way for the doctors to test it (because my mom could be bluffing)?

P.S. me and my moms relationship is good so she would trust me if I told her I didn't have sex plus if I did she would be understanding.

I Want To Be a Sex Educator. Er, How do I do That?

heavyboots asks:

I will be a junior in high school next year, and because I've been lucky to stumble on a lot of really great sex-positive resources, I've learned I have a pretty strong interest in sexuality--as in, studying it/doing something in it as a career. However, getting information about this field is much more difficult than, say, engineering or law. What are jobs within this field, what are areas in college/majors you'd advise, and what are some ways I can get involved now, as a minor? My areas of interest are not really in the medical field--I'm more interested in counseling, giving advice, activism, and education

Also, do you have any advice for telling people about my interest? Right now the only person who knows is my boyfriend, because it's really difficult for me to trust most other people to not equivocate wanting to study sexuality with being obsessed with having sex. Esp my parents, who are politically liberal in every way except in their parenting. They ask me what I want to do with my life really often, and it's kinda stressful to not be able to talk to them.

Glyde Condoms Supports Scarleteen!

We've got two new budding partnerships with condom distributors and resellers we're really excited about.

While ultimately, we would prefer Scarleteen be a place where there is no advertising, having a little bit, from carefully chosen companies or organizations, is one of the things that can help keep us financially supported. And in this case, we are delighted to be doing advertising with ethical companies who produce or sell things most of our readers very much need now, or will need soon: condoms and other barriers that can help prevent sexually transmitted infections and diseases and unwanted pregnancies, and help free up some worries so everyone can feel more relaxed in their sexual lives. We're proud to be working with these companies, and could not be more glad to have ways to direct our users not only to barriers, but to great barriers, made well, that protect their health and also support them in finding pleasure in their sexual lives.

Today we want to introduce you to one


May Day 2014: Scarleteen Strikes (Or, With Your Help, We Don't.)

UPDATE! We -- and you! -- did it!  WE SO TOTALLY DID IT! We met the minimum goal we needed to to avoid a strike and having to shut down any of our services.  We can't thank the 1,000+ of you enough who have helped us do this, and who have made it possible for all the young people who need and use our services to keep on using them without interruption.

Better still? A generous donor who wants Scarleteen to have more than the minimum to work with, and do what they can to get us past surviving and into thriving has offered up a $10,000 match for all donations given from April 15th to May 1st! So, anything you give now through May 1st will be matched, dollar for dollar, for up to $10,000 worth. If we can meet that whole match, that would shuttle us well out of our current crisis and into a better position financially than we have ever been.  Thanks so much to everone who has already given to support us; thanks to you in advance for your gift, too!

UPDATE THE SECOND (now with extra aweso


Happy 15th Birthday, Scarleteen!

We are 15 years old today. FIFTEEN! (In internet years, that's like being 500.)

We debuted online on December 15th, 1998 and here we are, still rolling, and wanting to keep on rolling some more, in 2013.

I can't thank our donors and supporters, all our volunteers past and present, and the tens of millions of users who have been the heart and soul of what we do, with them and for them, enough for being part of this grand experiment in sexuality education and emerging technologies. So much of Scarleteen is a community, and we have been blessed with a large, deeply diverse and incredible group over the years, one which has challenged, inspired, moved and motivated all of us, myself very much included. As the founder and executive director of Scarleteen, all of you have benefitted my own life, and been part of something I gladly consider the core of my life's work.

We intend to keep at what we do for at least another fifteen years if we can, experimenting and innovating, exploring and d


I want to give my boyfriend oral sex, but he's embarrassed and won't let me. What should I do?

Emma1913 asks:

I'm 13 and so is my boyfriend. I know we shouldn't be doing this kind of stuff at this age but just a couple weeks ago we started getting a little more "touchy" and one thing led to another and he started "eating me out".

Well I want to give him a blowjob but he's scared that I won't like "it" because he thinks it's small and he's embarrassed. What should I do? Also, is it normal to start having sexual intercourse at 16 or 17?

Giving the Gift of Excellent Sexuality Education and Support

If you're someone who takes part in end-of-year giving, we'd like to ask you to consider giving to Scarleteen.

As you may already know, Scarleteen was one of the first online resources for young people about sex and sexuality, and remains the leading, most visited online resource expressly created and maintained for young people to get extensive and excellent sex and sexuality information, education and support.

We provide opt-in, youth-driven content and direct services every year through articles that don't shortcut, but give young people the depth they ask for, advice columns done with the aim of support and education, not entertainment; a staffed SMS service and fully moderated message boards available seven days a week, 24 hours a day, where young people talk to real people with the skills to do so well, not templates, machines or some random yahoo on Yahoo; an ever-growing database of referrals to direct, in-person services and to other credible websites or organizations; in-per


Sex, Etc.

A for-teens, by-teens site dealing with birth control and pregnancy, STDs and testing, relationship matters, LGBTQ issues, and sexual politics. Sex, Etc. also publishes a teen-written magazine which accepts reader contributions.

Why Does Friendship Matter to a Sex Ed Organization?

It struck me today that folks might sometimes wonder why, with an organization focused on sexuality, sexual health, and sexual relationships, we spend quite a bit of time talking about friendship. We do it in articles and blogs, and we talk with users often in our direct services about their friendships.

What's that got to do with what we do?

A lot. Perhaps far more than you'd think.

For starters, we strongly feel that friendship is at the core of any and every excellent, happy, healthy relationship, whether we're talking about a friendship that doesn't have any romance or sex in it at all, or we're talking about romantic relationships, sexual relationships or both. We think a sound friendship also has an awful lot to do with healthy family relationships, mentorships, and pretty much any ongoing human interaction we could possibly have.

Our relationships with people will also tend to be fluid through our lives. Friends can become lovers, lovers can become friends or family. Our super


Information on this site is provided for educational purposes. It is not meant to and cannot substitute for advice or care provided by an in-person medical professional. The information contained herein is not meant to be used to diagnose or treat a health problem or disease, or for prescribing any medication. You should always consult your own healthcare provider if you have a health problem or medical condition.