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Ready or Not? The Scarleteen Sex Readiness Checklist

Thinking about partnered sex? Do yourself a favor and look through our checklist to get a good idea about the readiness of you and your partner -- it's more complicated and demanding than many people think, and knowing what you need to get ready can help assure that your sexual experiences with a partner will be as great for both of you as possible.

A problem with "premature" ejaculation...maybe isn't premature ejaculation.

ctguy asks:

My boyfriend and I started having sex about a week ago. Our first time was also my first time having sex. The three times we've had sex so far, I've finished a lot earlier than him, and a lot earlier than I want to. Basically I'm on the brink of coming by the time things get hot and heavy near the end of foreplay. I have no problem getting him off and I've managed to hide my quickness so far by pretending to come into a condom or tissue. But it's hard to keep up the ruse, and sex would obviously be a lot more enjoyable if I had control over my own stamina. Is this something that happens to all guys their first few times, or is there something I can do to fix it?

He Doesn't Want Sex Anymore. I Do. Now What?

chubbychickpea asks:

My partner and I have been dating for over a year now and have just begun to hit some rough patches. We used to have a lot of (what I thought was) really great sex. Then one day he told me that all that sex had been only mediocre for him. I was mortified and also ashamed because it felt like maybe he had never really want to have sex with me, he was just doing it because he knew I wanted to. Recently, he says that he might be asexual, but he isn't sure. He's trans and in the middle of transitioning, so he says his body is changing. He says masturbation "works wonders" for him, and he feels no sexual desire for me whatsoever. I've researched a/sexual relationships - the options are 1) me learning to like masturbation - I do, but it's not enough for me 2) him compromising to have sex, which reeks of non-consent and grosses me out 3) an open relationship, which isn't an option for either of us. I'm sexual. I want to feel sexy and desired and to have sex and everything that goes along with it. But if he isn't, what am I supposed to do? Right now the solution feels like I should just repress my libido so I won't need to have sex any more, but I don't even know if that's possible. I'm at an age where I'm being told left and right to assert myself as a woman, as a sexual person, as a queer person - but it seems like all of that's stopping now. If I'm not a sexual woman any more, I don't even know if I can consider myself a woman. That's right, this is potentially gender identity rocking for me. Please give me any and all advice. I'd appreciate it. - Sad, Confused, Terrified.

My parents and I have different ideas about sex and relationships - how can I still be honest with them?

purplenirvana asks:

How do I tell my mom that I'm not virgin anymore? Our family is very religious and believe in waiting for marriage. Me and my mom are really close and it just kills me not to tell her! Please help!

Don't Want to Have Sex?

Then don't! Here's a feast of support and help for those who want to say no, not now, or not-like-this to sex or sexual relationships.

Is 13 the "Right" Age for Sex or Romance?

Gabbii777 asks:

I'm wondering what a good age to have a 'relationship' is? I'm 13 and I've sort of began to have stronger attractions both emotionally and physically to boys. I'm not sure if I'm ready for a relationship and I'm scared that if it doesn't work (for example, if I'm frigid or something) it will ruin our friendship. I know it's not much of a big deal but I just want some help and reassurance.

D.I.Y Sex Toys: Self-Love Edition

A nifty little how-to for making and safely using sex toys for masturbation. Also starring: possibly the cutest little sex toy illustrations of ever.

自慰有错吗?

下一次有人告訴你,只有失敗者手淫,或者說他們不這樣做,永遠不會,牢記這一點:根據大多數研究和調查,約95%的成年人都有手淫或繼續這樣做。許多謊言和手淫真正的誤解,那豈不是95每100人將是盲目的,流口水精神病患者的頭髮在他們的手掌和生殖器萎縮。

How do I behave sexually without someone thinking I'm a slut?

gorg.mel asks:

How do I text my significant other without coming off as a thot or a whore?

双重保险:同时采用两种避孕措施

你已經知道的避孕方法不為100%,有效地防止懷孕。你可能也知道,不過,有可靠的方法,如果使用得當,這是非常有效的,而且如果你正確和堅持使用避孕措施,懷孕變成了一大堆的可能性較小。但你可知道,通過加倍和使用兩種方法,幾乎你使用任意組合,可以得到強大的接近100%,大部分組合?

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