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questioning

Q is for Questioning

What's it mean to be questioning, why would you or someone else identify that way, how do you deal in the process and how might you answer the question?

Attracted to women 24/7, but attracted to men in my fantasies--does that make me bisexual?

Anonymous asks:

I am a 15 year old male. I have been straight my entire life and have some romantic experience with girls. As a whole I am very attracted to girls. I absolutely worship the female body, and am turned on by them. But recently I've had some thoughts about guys as well. I have watched some male pornography and found myself turned on by attractive male models online. However I do not find any attraction to the guys I see daily ever. I know from the girls which guys are supposed to be cute. Yet I have no attraction to them. I cannot begin to imagine actually going on a date with a man. I guess I am confused because I am attracted to women 24/7, and attracted to men only in the confines of pornography or the occasional thoughts fantasies while masturbating. Am I bi-sexual? What does this mean?

Am I asexual?

thewitty1 asks:

I'm 17 years old and discovered the asexuality link on this site and I fit it really well, I feel safe to say that that website is the best thing that ever happened to me. But I'm not completely absent of sexual feeling, I just don't act on it. I sometimes feel like I really want to, but I talk myself down cause I tell myself it's not necessary and I don't act on my sexual impulses cause I don't like them and I think they're weird. I never get turned on by a person, just by a song or a scene in a book, but I never masturbate cause I don't want to and I've never really done anything with a guy. I wonder if I still feel the impulse if I'm asexual? I asked the asexual website but no one answered my email so I'm asking you. Am I a unique case? I also really like to kiss people, I think kissing is the best ever and I kiss lots of people of both genders. Am I still asexual? I really want to know, thank you.

My BFF and I hooked up at a sleepover; now she wants to have sex all the time but I want to stop

Anonymous asks:

anna says: I invited me friend for a sleepover and during the night she liked my clitoris, I didn't tell her to stop because I was worried about how she would take it but I'm not a lesbian so we ended up having sex even though I felt really weird about it. Now she wants to have sex all the time. what should I do?

I thought I was gay but now I'm questioning my orientation

Anonymous asks:

turbo18 asks:I've known I was gay for about 5 years (im now 19). Lately however something's been "wrong," I'm being attracted to certain women! I've even started looking at "straight" porn. Last night I made out with a girl for the first time, and I even asked her out and I have strong feelings for her (she knew I was gay).

I feel as I've lost my identity. I've dont know who or what I am anymore. I've been with and fallen for guys before. but now I'm questioning my own sexuality again, but for the opposite reason then most. I think I might be bisexual or straight.

My best friend just came out to me... but I was in love with him.

Andi asks:

My best friend (boy) just came out to me that he is gay (I'm a girl).

I have been in love with him for 2 years now, and I am utterly devastated by this. I am really, really heartbroken. This happened just 3 days ago and I'm still in a state of shock. I don't know what to do now. I tell myself I'm feeling sad because I thought I might lose him, because he is now this new person I never knew, because he was never the guy I thought he was. But honestly, it may be because I am losing him as in I can never be his girlfriend/wife (because he will never like girls!). How do I deal with this?

She came out...and now I'm questioning myself.

Amy asks:

My friend came out to me the other day. I've never doubted my sexuality, but in the instant that she told me this, I got this weird feeling. I actually thought to myself in that instant that I could possibly feel more than just friendly towards her. I fantasized or a moment that, if she did come on to me, I wouldn't be too unhappy about it and might actually be with her in that way.

I've become frustrated with men recently. The guy I'd been crushing on after mending a broken heart told me he was gay (which would be the third time in a row this has happened). Could this just be a reaction to that? I doubt that I'm a lesbian, as I think I'd know something like that by now. Could I be bi? Could I be straight but still experiment without being "bi"? Am I taking this teeny thought WAY too seriously?

I'm 15 and bisexual, but how do I know for sure?

Anonymous asks:

Hey, I'm 15, just turned, and bisexual. I can help but wonder if this is because of my hormones or if I really do like girls and guys. I mean, I like kissing both sexes, but I haven't had intercourse yet, and I need to find some way of determining how I feel. I'm proud to say I'm bi, but I don't want to be saying it and lying.

I thought I'd wait until marriage, but I've changed my mind.

Anonymous asks:

I am 21 years old and am a virgin. I am currently single, but I had a boyfriend in high school and part of college and we never actually had sex, but did everything leading up to it. A part of me always felt like I wasn't ready to be having sex with him even though I was attracted to him. Maybe it was because I was so young then. I always thought I would wait until marriage to have sex, but I also always thought I would be getting married quite early in my life (around 22 or 23). Now I have realized that I have no desire to get married that early, but I don't want to wait until I am in my upper 20's to experience sex. I recently met a guy who I get along with quite well. We are able to communicate very easily and I also find him attractive. He is from another country and is quite experienced sexually, and we have talked about this before and about how I am a virgin. I have been having thoughts about losing my virginity to him if something were to happen between us. Right now we are friends, and not in any sort of relationship, but that doesn't bother me. I am not wanting a boyfriend right now. My question is whether losing my virginity to him (if the opportunity arose) would be a bad idea? I feel as though I could trust him with that part of myself and I feel like I would be okay with us remaining friends afterward. I have not mentioned any of this to him, as 1) I am not sure how to go about it and 2) I don't know if he is even thinking anything like this. Any thoughts, help would be appreciated!

So, I'm thinking I'm bi?

Juanita asks:

I've identified as straight for my entire life, but recently been noticing that I may be attracted to girls as well. I'm thinking that I'm probably bi, maybe attracted 30% to girls, 70% to guys. What's so strange is that I went to an all-girls Catholic high school, and never found myself attracted to my schoolmates.

The thing is, I'm wondering if I'm attracted to girls, or just obsessing about my sexuality and therefore thinking that I'm attracted to girls because my obsessiveness makes me more aware of them. (I've had OCD symptoms before, so this is possible.) You see, I haven't had any major crushes on girls, but I think I could if I let myself see them romantically.

Then I'm wondering--if I am attracted to girls, which I probably am--is it worth coming out? I am definitely mainly attracted to guys, but I feel like I could be missing out on good relationships if I ignore this aspect of myself. But then, how would people view me? I go to a very liberal, accepting college, but what about my past roommates, for instance. We've seen each other naked, and it didn't mean anything to me, but would they think I had been attracted to them or something?

I'm thinking the easiest thing would be to change my "interested in" status on facebook. Then, if people felt like asking, they could, but I wouldn't have to tell people directly. I think my friends would be cool like that. But is it even worth the hassle? Am I making mountains out of obsessive molehills (to use a very mixed metaphor)? I do identify mainly as straight.

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