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No pleasure, no orgasm: what's wrong with me?

my.artsfinal asks:

My boyfriend and I have been dating for a good few years now, every time we have sex it feels like it's just for his pleasure. I really would like to be pleased as well, I mean the sex is nice.. don't get me wrong. But I don't think I've ever experienced an orgasm. I've taken advice from this site before, and I've tried masturbation on my own time, but it ends up taking me hours, and I just get frustrated. I've also discussed it with him, and we've experimented with so many things. The longest we've tried is three and a half hours. That's a little overwhelming and just plain annoying for the both of us. We've tried possibly every "extra" you can think of from biting, roleplaying, being sweet, being angry, to sucking, caressingly, and much more. Any type of contact down there just feels as casual as a massage, and the feeling never changes. What's my deal?

Am I ready & without rubbing my clitoris, will it even feel good if I am?

Madison D. asks:

I have been with my boyfriend for about three months and I am not sure if I'm ready to have sex. How do you really know if you're ready? We have talked about sex before and he wants to do it but I'm just not sure if I want to or not. We have done other things and have also talked about those and if it felt good for us. It was just a little bit awkward talking about it with him at first, then I got more comfortable. He's not pressuring me into doing it, I just want to make sure I'm absolutely ready because I don't want to regret it.

There is another question I would like to ask. If you have been masturbating for quite some time (by rubbing my clit), and I mean a long time, will I only be able to get pleasure from rubbing or will having sex feel good too? I have read somewhere that you can get used to one thing and only be able to feel pleasure from it. My boyfriend has fingered me, it hurt a little at first but then it didn't. It's not that I hated it, but I also didn't get pleasure from it. I'm scared that I won't be able to get pleasure from anything else other than rubbing. Please help.

End of the road for my anus?

Anonymous asks:

I have a rather embarassing question but I really need help. When having anal sex with my boyfriend, after he inserts it and all it comes to a point where it is almost like it will NOT go any further. It's like his penis is hitting a wall of some sort and it really hurts. I am very relaxed before we start so the initial penetration is not a problem at all, it's just that there is something stopping his penis from going all the way in. what is causing this and what can I do about this?

How can I stay hard for our first time?

Jay asks:

I am a 21 year old guy and I am a virgin. So is my girlfriend. We wanted to wait until we were 21.

We were planing on having sex for the first time last week. The night we tried it, I was very aroused and hard right up until it was time for me to enter her. As soon as I was ready to go in, I lost my erection. Realizing that we couldn't complete the act, we gave each other manual orgasms. (As soon as that started, I got very erect again). Every time we try to have sex I have the same problem. I am hard right before, I can get hard right after, but not when it counts. What can I do to avoid this? Should I drink a little alcohol before to loosen up? Take pills? Any advice will be helpful.

No pleasure

anonymous asks:

I have been sexually active for almost 2 years now. I get little to no pleasure out of sex, except for a few times. I can't have an orgasm either, I've tried all kinds of things and nothing seems to work. Is their something wrong with me? Any suggestions?

Bleeding after fingering?


I recently engaged in sexual activity with my ex-boyfriend, and it was the first time I got fingered. It hurt, but after a while I got used to it. I didn't bleed, but this morning when I went to the bathroom, I saw a great amount of blood. I don't know if it's from that, or if it's just my period that's here early. Does it sound normal? Please let me know because I'm freaking out.


Emma asks:

I can't have an orgasm: I have been sexually active for a year. Any suggestions?

Reciprocity, Reloaded

I’m going to suggest you look at reciprocity in sex -- the idea that one person gives something, so the other should get something of equal value back -- in a different way than you might be used to. (Excerpted and adapted from S.E.X., the Scarleteen book.)

Too big for me?

Anonymous asks:

My boyfriend and I have been trying to have sex and it just doesn't work. I'm a virgin and he isn't. I think he's too big for me. Or is it the position? Any suggestions?

Is Masturbation Okay? (Yep.)

The next time anyone tells you that only losers masturbate, or that they don't, and never would, bear this in mind: according to most studies and surveys, about 95% of adults have masturbated or continue to do so. Were many falsehoods and misconceptions about masturbation true, it would mean that 95 out of every 100 people would be blind, drooling psychopaths with hair on their palms and shrunken genitals.

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