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In which we're reminded, again, that abstinence pledges don't work.

From PEDIATRICS Vol. 123 No. 1 January 2009, pp. e110-e120 (doi:10.1542/peds.2008-0407): Patient Teenagers? A Comparison of the Sexual Behavior of Virginity Pledgers and Matched Nonpledgers, Janet Elise Rosenbaum, PhD, AM; Health Policy PhD Program, Harvard University, Cambridge, Massachusetts; Department of Population, Family, and Reproductive Health, Johns Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health, Johns Hopkins University, Baltimore, Maryland.

The subjects for this study were National Longitudinal Study of Adolescent Health respondents, a nationally representative sample of middle and high school students who, when surveyed in 1995, had never had sex or taken a virginity pledge and who were >15 years of age (n = 3440). Adolescents who reported taking a virginity pledge on the 1996 survey (n = 289) were matched with nonpledgers (n = 645) by using exact and nearest-neighbor matching within propensity score calipers on factors including prepledge religiosity and attitudes toward sex a

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How can I help my girlfriend see how beautiful she really is?

Jacob asks:

My girlfriend is uncomfortable being naked around me. She is beautiful and I love the way she looks. If she could see what I see, she would be more comfortable. What can I do to make her feel better?

Why can't I let go of his past?

Audrey asks:

I am 21 years old and have been with my boyfriend for eight months. This is the first relationship I have ever been in; we had sex only a couple of days after we met and I have been with him since. Obviously I trust him and love him and we have a very healthy relationship, but I have known for a while now that prior to meeting me, he slept with 15 other girls. I have a history of depression and ever since he has told me I have started to feel really horrible about it all - I never thought it was something that would ever bother me, as I have friends both male and female who are promiscuous, but I feel so much differently about it now that he has told me. I feel that it upsets me a lot and I don't know why and I can't understand it. I have tried to talk to him about it a lot but he won't open up to me and I don't know what else I can do.

inSPOT

A fantastic online tool to anonymously notify previous and/or current sexual partners if you are diagnosed with an sexually transmitted infection, so they they can get treatment for themselves and notify their partners, too.

I'm not sure if I want the pill or not!

Confuseddd asks:

I'm really torn on what to do. I'm a 17 year old, sexually active girl and I've been thinking about getting on the pill. My boyfriend and I use condoms every single time, but he wanted me to get on the pill because he says it feels better without one and also because pregnancy is something we both don't want. It took me forever to get up the courage to make an appointment at Planned Parenthood, and when I finally did, I canceled 5 hours before my appointment. I just couldn't go through with it. I think I want to get on the pill but I'm scared my mom will find out since I have to take it everyday, and I also don't want all of the side effects like mood change and weight gain. My boyfriend now says that I can do whatever I want, and that after getting used to condoms, he thinks that they feel the same as not using one. That's great and all that he's putting the decision completely in my hands but it also doesn't help because I have no idea what I should do. Is it okay for me to just use condoms? Is that safe enough, if we use them properly? Will the pill be too much of a hassle if I have to hide it, and does it really cause you to gain weight and get all sensitive? I don't know what to do at all. I want to be responsible with this but I just want to make sure I'm not choosing the wrong thing by sticking with only condoms.

Of love and skin

Anonymous asks:

I was born with a skin sickness called Neurodermatitis. I'm now 14 and so is my boyfriend, but I took a chance and told him why I have so many scars because he asked. Because of the sickness, I have the ugliest legs. I have purple spots, white spots, just scars upon scars upon scars. And there ALL OVER MY BODY. My boyfriend loves me very, very much and I do the same, but I'm worried about what he thinks about my body. I've never shown him what my skin looks like except my lower arms and upper chest (v-neck shirts, not topless). Will my body scare him to stop loving me?

Sex, period.

Anonymous asks:

Can you have sex when you have your period? If so, how?

I want to wait, but he's pushing (literally) and I'm not sure what's going on!

Anonymous asks:

My boyfriend is respectful of my wishes not to engage in pre-marital sex, but lately, he has been teasing me with his penis and sometimes applying pressure "down there." Then I always make sure he doesn't push any further, but a few times he has pushed a little bit into my labia. But lately, I have been wondering I have lost my virginity...have I?

I have HPV, and I don't want him to know.

Gaby asks:

I got HPV from my last sexual partner. I was wondering if I went to donate blood would I still be able to? My new partner doesn't know I have this and I don't want him to find out. By donating blood and getting the results back will they be able to tell I have it?

I feel awful about my previous sex life, but am worried if it's really okay for me to change.

Anonymous asks:

I'm very embarrassed to say that over the last year I have been very promiscuous, as in to having sex with 15 different partners. I have gotten over that phase, and I have sworn to stay celibate for at least six months. My question is whether or not it is possible for me to be tight again? Also, if it would be right for me to make a future boyfriend wait a while, before having sex with him? I mean, I gave it up to someone I just met, why would I make my 'boyfriend' wait? Please help, I feel so horrible with myself. I think that staying celibate will help me regain respect with myself, but, of course, I can never forget it.

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