myths

How do you tell when women are done having sex?

Liam
asks:
I know for a guy, sex is over once he ejaculates. But when is the sex over for a girl? Because I've always been told in sex ed that the guy is "finished" once he cums & that girls don't always ejaculate during sex. But I never really thought to ask about when a girl is "finished." So when does a guy know the sex has finished for both, if the girl doesn't always "finish off" like guys do? ...

Will I be the only virgin in my circle of friends and family forever?

Anonymous
asks:
I am a 19 year old female. And a virgin. The thing is I feel ready to experience sexual intercourse. Not only that, I feel it is a "stepping stone" that will allow me to "grow-up". All of my friends at this point have lost their virginity, including my 16 year old cousin! I feel left behind almost as if they've grown in some grand way that I have yet to experience....

How can vaginas not vary much in size, for real?

Anonymous
asks:
I was reading posts and noticed that a lot of them said how sex should be easy if the girl is turned on and relaxed. I have a smaller build and perceive it to be proportional in "all areas". I'm 19. I really enjoy sex and I have been sexually active for two years....

My best friend was raped: what can I do for her?

Suze
asks:
First off, thank you for this site. It's wonderful. Now, I'm a just-graduated senior, and my best friend went with a big group to Florida for their senior trip. She called me wasted and crying, upset and saying that this guy I'll call E wanted to have sex with her, she told him no, and he did it anyway. His side of the story was that she didn't protest. Sounds like rape, right?...

Why we don't always know

One of the more interesting (and by interesting, I mean ridiculously ignorant) responses I have seen in a few places discussing the I Was Raped project and my input was my statement on the news that the first time I was assaulted -- at the age of 11 -- I did not know what had happened to me and was without any language to even express it.

This is being met with some measure of disbelief by a few folks, or the assumption I was on drugs or had been drugged or that I was simply stupid.

Do vibrators cause a loss of sensitivity?

girl16
asks:
I have heard two different stories; one, that using a vibrator can do no harm, and two, that using a vibrator can do worlds of harm! I have heard that using one will desensitize the area and make sex with a real person totally unenjoyable and dissatisfying. Which theory is true?...

I'm not ready...but am I just overthinking it?

Barbara
asks:
I have been so grateful for this site, it has been wonderful in making me more comfortable about my relationship. Basically, it comes down to the fact that my boyfriend and I are at the point where sex would seem like the next natural step, but every time we get close, we end up having a discussion instead....

I didn't bleed, and now everyone is saying I wasn't really a virgin.

confused
asks:
This site is amazing. I've followed many of the articles here and they've helped me alot throughout my questioning days. But now, I've heard a lot about womens hymens being the maker and/or breaker of their virginity but in my case it wasn't. I lost my virginity to my boyfriend of 2 years a few days ago, and I didn't bleed like my friends told me I would....

Cherries Jubilee

Anonymous
asks:
I was fingering a girl that I have been hanging out with for a while now and she's a cool girl. She's had sex before and is not a virgin but when I was fingering her, I felt the cherry and then after we were done she said she started her period. This isn' the first time a girl has started to bleed cause of me fingering them and its not cause I have long nails, my nails are fine....