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My boyfriend is 22 this year and he has had one sexual partner before me, I am 21 and he is the first person I've ever had a sexual relationship with. We've been having sex for almost a year and we've been together for about two years. I was wondering whether it is normal for a guy to be able to have an erection that lasts for 40 minutes (at least) to almost an hour (sometimes more) in bed? He tells me that a lot of girls want a guy who can last long in bed, but unfortunately for me (and ironically, him as well), I can never find the stamina to keep going for that long - we both do our parts and take turns with who is on top, but I reckon this is due to the whole process taking about 3 hours at least because of foreplay and the cuddling after sex. If we take a break, either of us will just lose the mood to continue. It is the same whether or not I give him a hand/blow job before we start having sex - he still maintains his erection for a very long time. I do get frustrated because of how long it can take, and although there are times when I do enjoy him being able to last so long, other times I'd rather just have a quickie. Is there anything we can do about this? Or is it just something certain guys have? I don't want to ask him about his previous sexual relationship because I'm comfortable not knowing the details.
Another question I have is whether a guy can be too used to his own hands when he masturbates, so much so that no matter how I try I can't get him to cum no matter what method I use when I'm giving him a blow/hand job (just my hands, hands and mouth, mouth only) which is what I do when he needs a release and I'm having my period. The reason I'm asking is also because when I'm tired or sore from all the vigorous sexercise, sometimes I try to finish him off with a hand/blow job but it's the same and it doesn't get him off unless he takes over and does it himself.
He doesn't complain about it, and doesn't force me to do anything that I am not comfortable with, but I do want to be able to satisfy him from beginning until the end because he never fails to satisfy me. Am I missing anything here?
I'm planning to start taking birth control, patches to be more specific. My boyfriend and I used to just use just the withdrawal method before we started using condoms and he is still very uncomfortable with condoms. He cannot be as aroused when he has it on. I know sex feels better without a condom but, I would like to know if using a condom is completely necessary when already taking another type of birth control, like the pill or the patch? What do most women regularly do?
My girlfriend and I have been dating for one and a half years and are in a long distance relationship (I visit her once a month). When we first starting dating (it wasn't long distance then) she was crazy in bed and really open about sex. But recently she has been wanting to talk less and less about sex. She doesn't say anything if I even mention something that is sexually related. I asked her why, and she said that she doesn't feel like thinking about that kind of stuff and that she feels dirty for thinking about it. She doesn't seem to have ANY sort of sexual attraction to me when just a few months ago she couldn't keep her hands off of me. I understand that she is going to college and is very stressed out, but can stress completely shut off someone's sex drive? How can I talk to her without offending her or making her think that sex is all that I am interested in.
I just lost my virginity more than a week ago. Everytime me and my BF have sex it always hurts, usually a few hours after doing it I start to bleed. I've asked my friends if thats normal but they don't know. Is that normal? I also wanted to asked why I haven't been feeling any pleasure yet? Is that bad? I would like it if you would please answer my questions I don't know where else to go and ask.
A friend of mine referred me to this website to sort out some of my complications that arise during sex. I am 17 and have been sexually active for probably the past 6 months but not once have I reached an orgasm. I have no idea what is wrong with me and I am desperate to find out because it is destroying mine and my boyfriend's sex lives. I can orgasm through clitoral stimulation but that is it and I do not know what else I can do. Please help me because I don't know what is wrong with me.
My boyfriend and I have been together about 6 months. We are very compatible in terms of interests and values (the outdoors, conservation of resources, frugal living, healthy eating, etc). I am 22 and he is 60. Both of us have had sex with only one other person in our lives--me, my ex-boyfriend and him, his ex-wife.
He wants more sex than me. Big surprise. He's a man. I understand that. I enjoy sex when we have it (1-2 times a week), but I don't want to push myself to have it when I'm not in the mood. My boyfriend is very understanding intellectually, but his body wants much more. We've been talking about this quite a bit, and the fact that he is willing to talk tells me he is a good man. I don't want any strife over this, so I was wondering if you knew of any coping strategies that might work to help us compromise.
On a deeper level, he acknowledges that he uses time with me as an escape from his worries, whereas I tend to bring my worries into the time we have (I'm a student, so I have to do homework on weekends, for example. I can't just forget about work.) He tends to be very goofy, knocking me onto the bed, tickling me, etc., and it gets tiring responding to this. He says, "I'm sorry I like you more than you like me." How am I supposed to respond to that? DUDE! He's old and I was knocked flat with desire the week I met him! I pursued him because I couldn't imagine letting him slip through my fingers.
He says he wants to live with me, and get married. I don't think that's a good idea if he uses my company to escape his troubles--we won't get through anything if he keeps using my company as an escape. Understand that he is a decent, principled man; he married the girl he got pregnant 40 years ago and stayed with her to raise the child. Consequently, he wants to be understanding of my needs and is compulsive about birth control. We simply have a conflict due to our respective sexes and sex drives. I wonder what we can do.
Neither my boyfriend or I have engaged in sexual intercourse, with each other of someone else, but we do fool around quite a bit. We both perform oral sex on each other, but he says he doesn't like performing on me once I get wet. He tries his hardest to please me with his fingers but I think a full oral sexual experience would feel so much better. Why does he dislike this and how can we improve the experience for him?
I had unprotected sex with my girlfriend 2 days after her periods was over, as she told me that 10 days after period are safe to have unprotected sex. Her last period was 27th October. Well today, 19th November, she called me and said that her period repeats in 20-25 days and she should have period now but she is not having. Can you tell me the reason? Another question, is that safe to have unprotected sex after period within 10days? Please mail me answer, also fast please.
Last summer ('06) I was pressured to sex by my former best friend. I kinda blocked it out and it's come back with full force now. I had a flash back when having sex with my boyfriend about a week ago and that was horrible! Any idea how I can cope with that?
And how do I cope with the feelings of guilt and shame. I really feel like the whole thing was partially my fault.. What happened was that we hadn't seen each other for a year cos he'd moved and when I came to visit we made out. He wanted to go further and I didn't. When I refused to go down on him he spiked me drink and made me do it when I was drunk. Unprotected. (Had STI screening since then, which was all clear...) I just feel like I could've somehow done something. Like keep an eye on my drink or say no more forcefully or just plain fight him off. I don't really know how to deal with this... I hope you can help..
Also, I was talking to a male friend the other day and he thought that men should have an option to legally not be fathers in case of a pregnancy. Like not be obliged to pay for child care and not be a part of the kids life whatsoever. I thought that this was ridiculous, but couldn't come up with any sound reasons why I though so.. It was just a general feeling. If this discussion comes up again what can I say?