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masturbation

How to Handle a Libido That Switched from Low to High

Gwynhafra asks:

I'm a 24-year-old woman who's never had any kind of partnered sex or been in a relationship. Until very recently, my libido was like a quiet walk in a very dull park. I had to make a serious effort to become sexually aroused, and was attracted mostly to men, but not very many men. I would masturbate maybe five or six times a month, and never orgasm. Intellectually I knew there was nothing wrong with that, but I felt freakish and insufficiently sexual.

I recently learned how to give myself an orgasm, though, and now I get incredibly turned on sometimes when I'm not even thinking about sex. I've gone from quiet walk in the park to stuck on a runaway train. It's distracting, embarrassing, and physically exhausting. When given the chance I will masturbate about fifteen times a day. On top of all that I've started noticing women as sexually attractive, and more men as attractive than I did before. This all happened within the space of three days. I know sexuality can be fluid but I kind of assumed the changes were gradual.

Why am I suddenly insatiable? I'm worried that either this will continue and I'll spend my days in perpetual need of a cold shower, or I'll go right back to being mostly desireless.

Male Bodies Vs. Female Bodies: Why Go There?

r89 asks:

I don't mean to ask a silly question, but is there anything that makes being female good in terms of sex? It seems to me men have all the biological luck - they are aroused more easily, they orgasm more frequently, they can orgasm regularly from both oral/manipulative sex and intercourse, their is more square inches of erectile tissue to play around with, etc. I often listen to my guy friends talk, and lately it has been making me feel very inferior. Is there anything going for us?

What Is Healthy Sexual Development?

Depending on your view, the answer to that question might seem really obvious or very tricky and hazy.

This is a subject that's talked about all the time, however, when it is, there's often little to no clear definition about what healthy sexual development is. Many easy assumptions get made, and ideas about what's healthy for all people are often based in or around personal agendas, ideas and personal experiences of sexuality, rather than being based in broader viewpoints, truly informed and comprehensive ideas about all that human sexuality and development involves and real awareness of possible personal or cultural bias.

We think this question is very, very tricky and that the answers aren't at all obvious or easy: sexuality is incredibly complex, especially given its incredible diversity, not just among a global population, but even within any one person's lifetime. Our cultures also are often sexually unhealthy in many ways, and so ideas about healthy sexual development, deeply i

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How can I stick to the promise I've made to myself to wait?

IthilienDude asks:

I'm a Christian, and I have decided to save myself till marriage. I'm perfectly fine with that. My boyfriend is fine with that too (we've been together a month), and respects my decision. However, like any celibate person would admit, sometimes I get these truly surreal urges for sex: I catch myself thinking that maybe even a little bit of touching while kissing would be fine, or I just think about what it would be like if we ever got married and ended up sleeping together. I have said nothing to my boyfriend, in case he misconstrues it as an invitation, but it has recently been very, very difficult to resist, especially with all these hormones making me want sex. I want to stay true to my decision to stay premaritally celibate, and I will pride myself on not being tempted, however my urges make the battle all the harder sometimes. Any suggestions?

Feeling pain or feeling nothing at all = my experience of sex.

yougivemefever asks:

I seem to not be able to feel any sort of pleasure from anything sexual. I'm 17 and have never been able to achieve an orgasm. It hurts being fingered. I've never been able to masturbate, because I could not keep focus or it started hurting. It also feels too awkward. When my boyfriend tried doing it, it hurt. He tried giving me oral sex, but that was painful. I tell him it hurts, and he tries to go as gently as he can, but it still hurts. I'm frustrated because I get no satisfaction, and my boyfriend's self esteem is damaged because he thinks it's his fault. We lost our virginities to each other a couple of months ago. It hurt a lot the first two times. After it stopped hurting, it just felt like nothing. I didn't have the heart to tell my boyfriend until recently that I don't feel anything. Now he's really upset because he feels like a pig and that he used me. He says I subconsciously don't love him, and that's why I don't feel anything.

It seems like I'm the only one with the problem of not being able to feel anything during sex AND clitoral stimulation hurts.

I'm into my friend and want to fool around with her, but will she do it?

Samuel F. asks:

I'm 15, and I have a close female friend of the same age with D-cup bra size and very good looks all-around. She hasn't shown much visible interest in sexuality, but we haven't talked very much about it at all. I've been wanting to see if she'd want to fool around. Is that really way too much for friendship or could I somehow get her to do it willingly?

Why doesn't Sex Feel Good?

clk666 asks:

im 17, and have never ben able to have an oragsm through sex. people have told me that its the guys im with but ive been with enough guys to know its not them, its definately me. i dont even like sex, i mean sure i like it, some positions feel alright, but other than that im kinda sitting there like, "okay just get it over with". i have even tried many different positions and none of them seem to help, some even hurt, ALOT. i can orgasm with my vibrator because it stimulates my clit, but anything vaginal is more just annoying. i do have a baby, and before i had her sex felt better, i was still never able to orgasm, but i was still able to feel more of it than just "in and out". is this normal? anything i can ddo to have an orgasm through sex? and is the feeling loss due to giving birth?

He likes it, I don't. What now?

turnwavesmile asks:

I don't feel anything at all when I touch myself. It just feels like nothing inside and doesn't arouse me at all. The only way I can masturbate is by rubbing the palm of my hand on my clit. When my boyfriend and I are together, he likes to finger me. But like I said before, I don't feel anything. It gets pretty awkward when he's just fingering me and it's not feeling like anything and it just drags on forever, while he has no idea. What should I do?!

Having trouble reaching orgasm? Masturbation is your friend.

buddybuds asks:

I am 17, me and my boyfriend of two years had a spree of sexual intimacy. We did everything every day, couples times a day here and there. I read a lot about how masturbation can help to bring a woman to orgasm, I don't feel the need to, but doesn't it help that my boyfriend and I basically did every day? I have lost my extreme sex drive, I feel like no matter what it wont happen for me (orgasm). I love giving him what he wants, he tries to give me the same but it never happens? Is there any way past masturbation that can help for an orgasm and bring that sex drive back to my life?

I'm 14: Is it normal to want sex?

emm asks:

Most of the time at school I will see a cute guy and want to sleep with him. Is it normal to be horny at my age (14) and do boys want to have sex with me too?

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