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honesty

Long distance becomes distasteful when other aspects are disturbing

aspiring phoenix asks:

Dear Scarlet(een),
I live 1500 miles away from a guy I've been seeing. Without planning it, our travels have brought us to the same cities a couple times in the past few months. Unusual for me, but fun.

We're not dating, but I guess he likes me because he seems to be trying to hold things together between us.

I like him...sometimes.

Problem is he's SERIOUSLY weird and on top of it has waaay more experience than I do. I don't know if I can handle an ongoing physical relationship with him anymore - even if I'm 1500 miles away most of the time.

Yesterday while I was visiting him he told me he was sending porn to a female friend who wanted to see the evolution of his tastes from ages 18-25. Then he said he thought of all porn as art and an uncomfortable discussion followed when I disagreed. Guess I'm down for the count on that subject since I don't watch porn usually.

How do I get my girlfriend comfortable with the idea of a threesome?

muskate23 asks:

Me and my GF have been going out for about a year and I want to get her comfortable with us bringing in another girl, but I don't know how to approach her about it. I don't know what I should say to get her comfortable. I don't want to sound as if I want another girl, I just want to try something new.

We're saving sex for marriage, but he wants to have anal sex.

May asks:

I am 22 years old and my BF is 23 years old. We are both virgins and we both want to stay virgins until marriage. We have been together for 3 years now and lately he mentioned to me that he wants to have anal sex. I want to do it but I want to ask if he should wear a condom. Also, will it hurt?

My best friend just came out to me... but I was in love with him.

Andi asks:

My best friend (boy) just came out to me that he is gay (I'm a girl).

I have been in love with him for 2 years now, and I am utterly devastated by this. I am really, really heartbroken. This happened just 3 days ago and I'm still in a state of shock. I don't know what to do now. I tell myself I'm feeling sad because I thought I might lose him, because he is now this new person I never knew, because he was never the guy I thought he was. But honestly, it may be because I am losing him as in I can never be his girlfriend/wife (because he will never like girls!). How do I deal with this?

He says he wants sex to be more about him, but what does that mean?

confused asks:

Last night my boyfriend had a few drinks and he got really honest with me...He said that he thinks when were in bed its always all about me and he thinks it should be more about him in return. I don't know what he wants me to do, mostly we have sex missionary but often with my legs in different positions. I do enjoy being on top and get on top often, but maybe that's not enough? I have given him oral and always believed I was good at it. What positions are more pleasurable for men where women do more of the work? I was also wondering if a man orgasms every time he comes?

I've been faking, but I just don't want to tell him.

Anonymous asks:

I'm seventeen years old and have been sexually active with my boyfriend for the year that we have been together. I have faked orgasm almost every time we have had intercourse. I have read your site and read the dialogue you have provided on how to come clean about this form of dishonesty. However, I feel that at this point I am not sure the best thing to do is come clean. I would like your thoughts on what sort of dialogue I should be having with my boyfriend concerning different things we can do so that I can achieve orgasm, without hurting his feelings. Do you think it's healthy to not tell him at all and move on towards a healthier relationship?

Is our spark fading because I kissed his best friend...or something else?

Anonymous asks:

I have a question regarding sex but also emotions. I've had the same boyfriend for 3 years and we have haven't had a sexual partner before each other. We love each other greatly but his best friend and me have gotten to know each other better and one night, we kissed. We didn't mean it to happen but it did and it almost happened again but I stopped it the second time around...so when I have sex with my boyfriend, it feels great during the action...but then I always feel down in the dumps right after. Is it because I'm not ready to have sex again until this situation clears my head or am I completely turned off on having sex with my boyfriend? I love him greatly but sometimes I don't feel as sexually attracted to him as I am to his best friend...please help me! Thank you.

Am I pregnant? (And, why feeling you have to lie and go without protection isn't okay.)

Anonymous asks:

I had sex a few days after my period and I made sure it was over. I lied to my boyfriend bout it so that I had time to make sure it was clean. 3 weeks later I had my period. My periods are usually irregular so I figured it's okay. But I'm still so so worried. Please help! Could I be pregnant? I haven't been feeling anything at all and I've only done it once, just that night. No sperm came out either.

Be a Blabbermouth! The Whys, Whats and Hows of Talking About Sex With a Partner

Open, honest communication with your partners is key to healthy, beneficial and satisfying sexual experiences. Need some help learning how to make it happen and keep it flowing?

I have HPV, and I don't want him to know.

Gaby asks:

I got HPV from my last sexual partner. I was wondering if I went to donate blood would I still be able to? My new partner doesn't know I have this and I don't want him to find out. By donating blood and getting the results back will they be able to tell I have it?

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