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I'm 14 and Want a Baby. Is That Weird or Slutty?

kenzieayana asks:

I'm 14 years old, a very responsible one, at that. I've gotten in trouble with having sex in the past and now I'm thinking about having a baby. I understand that I'm too young but I know how to take care of one. I've been taking care of kids just about my whole life. But I'm just wondering, is it weird or slutty to know that I want a baby? I need help really bad. Btw, I don't want to hear all of the negative things.

So, About That Study...

Over the weekend, we linked to reports on the presentation of a study in our Twitter feed and on our Facebook about the effect of sex during adolescence on academics, such as college goals, grade point average, dropout, truancy and absentee rates. On Sunday and Monday, the piece got a whole lot of media and internet airplay, even though it was clear few, if any, reporting on it had yet looked at the study itself.

This morning, we were able to sit down and read the study, Sex and School: Adolescent Sexual Intercourse and Education (Bill McCarthy, Sociology, University of California Davis and Eric Grodsky, Sociology, University of Minnesota), which Bill McCarthy graciously emailed us when we requested it, and he also graciously answered a few of my questions about it directly. We're going to have a larger conversation with them soon that we'll publish here, but as that may take a while, we wanted to clear some of the smoke before it got much thicker. It's a solid study with some importa

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Spotlight on Scarleteen: New Years Resolutions

Happy New Year to you from all of us at Scarleteen!

Nearly a month into 2010, we hope your new year has been and continues to be happy, healthy, and all-around awesome. Have you set any New Year Resolutions this year? We have and would like to share them with you!

Over 1000 Scarleteen users are doing just that! Since December 19th and as of yesterday, 1001 visitors to the Scarleteen website have voted in the poll: Which of these is the best sexuality-based New Year's resolution for you? A lot of people will choose resolutions, such as exercising more, getting better grades, and quitting smoking. Those are all noteworthy goals, and big accomplishments when realized, but how about aiming to exercise safer sex all the time, acing a “quiz” of your own anatomy, and quitting bad body image and sexual shame? By setting a sexuality-related resolution, you’re focusing on an important part of you that often doesn’t get the attention (or praise!) it deserves.

THE RESULTS! We’re going

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Why Cory Loves Premature Ejaculation

This is a quickie. But it was so fantastic, and here at Scarleteen we have so many young men who are so freaked out and upset when they ejaculate sooner than they'd like, that I had to race over here and link to it ASAP.

From the piece, by the wonderful Cory Silverberg:

...the idea of premature ejaculation presupposes that there is a clear end goal, and that you’re getting there too soon. It also presupposes that extending sex is an obvious goal of sex. If you’re ejaculating before you want to, or before your partner wants to, the first thing you ought to do is ask yourself, what is it that I want to extend? Is the sex I’m having good enough to want to make it last longer? Am I coming quickly because really, there’s not much to wait around for? And do I want the goal I set for sex to be one that requires a stopwatch to evaluate?

What if all you wanted from a sexual encounter was to feel good? If ejaculating prematurely feels bad then you’ve got a good reason to learn to control ejacul

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The luck (or not) of the draw

lisasucks asks:

I'm 19 and my boyfriend is 28. We've been having sex for a year now and we have not been very careful at all. We never use condoms! It's weird though cause I have not gotten pregnant. He usually doesn't ejaculate in me LOL but still. . . . I always joke and tell him he's sterile but now I'm really thinking he is. Since I haven't gotten pregnant does this mean there is something wrong with my boyfriend or me? Or does it just mean I'm lucky?

Spotlight on Scarleteen: Favorite Articles

Happy New Year to you!

We hope your 2009 is happy, healthy, and downright fantastic. These may be hard times, but there’s still so much to be grateful for and glad about— plus, there’s no better time than now for you to take action and make a difference!

I’m sure you have a lot of positive things to look forward to –- friends, family, school, work, hobbies, and more. If you’re not feeling too hot about what’s to come, that’s a great reason to begin brainstorming ideas. You can start right here at Scarleteen: With over ten years of providing comprehensive, inclusive and original sex education to millions of young adults under its belt, you know you can turn to Scarleteen for new articles, new blog entries, new discussions, and more in 2009. (As always, your support is greatly appreciated-- you're what keeps us around!)

Something old, something new, something you

Let’s take a step back to review some of the oldies-but-goodies at the site. In this Spotlight on Scarleteen blo

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Why I Deeply Dislike Your Older Boyfriend

There doesn't seem to be a week that passes at Scarleteen where we're not helping a user who is in some kind of crisis -- and often a whopper -- with an older male partner: pressured sex or a sexual abuse, a pregnancy scare (usually due to the guy having any and every reason why other guys can use condoms, but he's the great exception to every rule), a newly-acquired STI (again with the condom refusals, sometimes paired with lies about testing and sexual history), an abusive relationship (and often combined with a pregnancy scare, pregnancy or STI), isolation from friends or family (often beca

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Why I Deeply Dislike Your Older Boyfriend

He may be older but he's not wiser, and he's not acting like a grownup. He doesn't want to grow up, which is part of why he's dating people he perceives as not grownup themselves. He also doesn't have the bad stuff that happens to you because of him happen to him to make him want to change: if he was in your shoes, he'd ditch him in a heartbeat.

I Want It NOW!

The majority of pregnancies that occur for adolescent women are unplanned. But some pregnancies in the teen years -- a general estimate is usually about one in five -- are intended or planned. One reason that sex education likely hasn't reduced those pregnancy rates as much as it might is that some teens know full well what birth control is and how and when to use it, but choose not to, sometimes because they -- maybe you -- want to become pregnant.

Information on this site is provided for educational purposes. It is not meant to and cannot substitute for advice or care provided by an in-person medical professional. The information contained herein is not meant to be used to diagnose or treat a health problem or disease, or for prescribing any medication. You should always consult your own healthcare provider if you have a health problem or medical condition.