Skip to main content
I feel like at my age (16), it is so young to have sex. If I were to be dating someone right now, so many things would scare me, that I would choose not to have sex. The chance of an STI, pregnancy, not being good enough for my partner, having my parents find out, and so many more things. I'm scared that during sex, that I wont know what to do and I'm just not comfortable with my body. Most of my friends are having sex and they say they like it, but the fact is, that I'm terrified. Everything about sex scares me. I'm worried about my body, what my partner will tell his friends, the rumors that will get around school, being inexperienced, and I'm scared it will hurt for the first time. I don't want to be seen as up tight for not wanting to have sex, and I know I don't mind having sex before marriage, but I was just wondering about moving past my fears and letting go. So, if you have any ideas, I would love to hear back from you.
I am 15 and when I was 14 I started becoming very interested in masturbating. I actually used objects and penetrated them inside my vagina. After a while i realized how stupid I was being so I stopped with the masturbating. I've been dating my boyfriend for about 4 months and we are so comfortable with each other. He makes comments as a joke about vagina tightness and how I'll bleed when I have sex at first and it will hurt. But the thing is I have basically de-virgined myself. Will the guy who I lose my virginity to notice that having sex for the first time with me will be easy to get in and everything? I really regret masturbating and everything. This may sound stupid but I'm very worried.
This is more of a psychological issue, I think, than a physical one, and possibly unsolvable, but I'll ask your opinion anyway because this site seems pretty clued up and sensibly feminist and lovely.
I have recently become disgusted with the idea of male pleasure. It's like I'm... too feminist to function. I have had sexual partners in the past, but recently, the more I learn about male character (although that is a gross generalization, I know - there is no innate male or female "character"), the less reconciled I am to pleasing men. My rational mind knows that there are plenty of men who are not misogynist pigs, who don't objectify women, who aren't secretly rapists... yet when I fantasize about sex, and men getting pleasure from sex, I feel physically repulsed. Like, how dare they use my body, they're just like trying to get pleasure from me. I know that is MASSIVELY unjust because surely women are using men too, but I literally can't help it.
Me and my boyfriend have been together for a long time, and I just found out that I have HPV. I told my boyfriend that I had it as soon as I found out and now he is acting really weird. Now, he doesn't want to give me oral because he is afraid that he may get it. I went to the doctor and asked if he could get it, and she said that as long as we are careful he shouldn't have anything to worry about. When I told him the news he did not believe me! He still will not give me oral even though it has been a couple of months. I am really frustrated!
I'm 14 years old and a virgin. When I explore myself or masturbate I find that I can fit at least 3 fingers inside myself without much discomfort. I haven't had sex and yet it feels like I'm stretched out or something. Could this mean that I really am just loose? I mean I've been fingered by my boyfriend before but never anything else.
Shouldn't my hymen be intact? My friend told me that the heavier your period flow is how wideset you are *downthere*. What could she mean by that? I'm so confused and embarrassed that I don't know better. Please help.
I'm 18 and have been sexually active with my boyfriend for about a year. We've done all sorts of things with each other, including oral sex. However, he refuses to perform oral on me. I've given him blowjobs many times. He says he enjoyed it very much, except he felt bad because he didn't want to reciprocate. He says that if I don't want to give him a blowjob, he would completely understand. But I love giving oral; I don't feel that it's unfair to me if I choose to do it. Even so, I really wish he would go down on me. When I asked him why he doesn't want to, he said he doesn't know. What could be bothering him, and what can I do to convince him that giving me head isn't as scary as it apparently seems to him?
My girlfriend and I have been dating for about 8 months. I am 18, she is 17. I've been consistently fingering her/going down on her for several months now. Yet she has never taken the initiative as to go down on me, not even so much as with her hand. The only contact she seems able to handle with my penis is in sex, which we've tried to no avail (can't get it in). The fact that we can't have sex wouldn't bother me whatsoever if she went down on me every once and a while. What bothers me most is that she doesn't seem like she wants to get me off whatsoever. She seems literally terrified of my penis, though strangely OK with sex (I suspect this is because sex is pleasurable for her, too). Meanwhile, I am completely opposed to the idea of suggesting she go down on me, because I feel like she ought to want to anyway. Long story short, she seems perfectly attuned to receiving pleasure but not to giving it. What can I do?
I'm 17yrs old, not sexually active, never had a boyfriend (and I'm more than fine with it). Ever since my friend came out as bisexual, I've had this horrible feeling that I might be too. I've thought sexually about women for a few years now, and occasionally look at female porn. I just assumed this was normal, straight-girl activity, even though I don't think about guys as, um, graphically. Since my friend came out I've found myself attracted to certain women, not just sexually but romantically, as well as guys.
I just DON'T WANT to be lesbian or bi. I have no problems with them, but I don't want it to be part of my life. I'm terrified I'll have to acknowledge it - my family's loving but straight-laced and wouldn't accept it, for one thing, and it's just not the way I planned my life to run. I don't know how to explain it without sounding bigoted, but I don't want to deviate from the social "norm". I don't know what to do. Is there any way of...checking, some how? Is the Kinsey Scale accurate? Am I just imagining it since my friend came out?
Please tell me what to think, because I don't know what to do. Thanks in advance. I'm so glad for this website.
I'm 16 and my best friend, that happens to be a guy, is 25. We've never done anything sexual, and we don't plan to. The most we do is hold hands, and its like holding hands with my older brother. I'm just scared that someone will take that in the wrong way (as if we were dating) and my friends have told me that he could go to jail if someone reports him as my boyfriend or saying that something sexual is going on between us. I don't want him to get in trouble but I also don't want to lose my video game buddy.
I know about the age of consent, but does that mean I can't even hold hands in a public place with my best friend?