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expectations

He thinks it's unattractive when I touch my clitoris, but I don't enjoy sex otherwise!

Anonymous asks:

When I have sex it doesn't really feel that good. For me to have an orgasm I HAVE to play with my clitoris and my boyfriend finds it very unattractive. I don't know how to stimulate my "area" right and I think the advice would be nice. I'm 18 years old and I think that it is a bad thing that this is happening to me so young! I just don't feel the "amazing pleasure" I hear other girls talk about. How do I stimulate myself to have a healthier sex drive and feel the pleasure I hear about? Thank you for the help and support!

Does being attracted to teenagers make me a pedophile?

curty asks:

I find myself more attracted to teenagers than females my own age (23). Am I becoming a paedophile? It's just that I imagine a teenager having a sense of awe and wonder when it comes to sex that is lost with time (not necessarily with experience).

I'm amazed at my own temerity in asking and having used the "p" word above I'm sure you won't answer my question but I assure you it is genuine. Any chance you know of some resources that may help? Thanks for taking me seriously.

Why aren't you psychic?

HELP101 asks:

I'm 21 and me and my fiance have been sexually active for quite a while now. He says that sex isn't boring, BUT (and the but is never good) he wants to be able to say "Wow, she is a freak!" when we get done. I don't know what he is looking for, but I'm up to try anything. He says he won't tell me exactly what he wants me to do because then it won't be a surprise when I do it. I just don't want sex to get boring between us, so I need some advice.

Two women, two partners, and four folks frustrated with intercourse.

frustrated asks:

My boyfriend and I have been going out for one year and have been sexually active for some time. Usually we have pretty good sex. But lately I've just been getting upset because I can never orgasm through intercourse. I know that's normal for girls but when I ask him to do other things, he usually doesn't want to. I almost always orgasm when he eats me out but he hardly ever does that and if he does it's never long enough. He wants to just move into having sex. I'm starting to feel like it's a chore for me and sex is just a way to get him off and then we're done. But I want to feel pleasure too. I already love him and love being with him sexually but is there a way we can try to make me orgasm through vaginal intercourse? Or is there a way I can make it more comfortable for him to eat me out?

Will I be the only virgin in my circle of friends and family forever?

Anonymous asks:

I am a 19 year old female. And a virgin. The thing is I feel ready to experience sexual intercourse. Not only that, I feel it is a "stepping stone" that will allow me to "grow-up". All of my friends at this point have lost their virginity, including my 16 year old cousin! I feel left behind almost as if they've grown in some grand way that I have yet to experience. It's like everyone else getting their license and you're still riding your bike to school. I have another dilemma that rebukes this problem as well - I'm waiting for the "right guy" to `come along. But the trouble with that is, I don't know who "Mr.Right" is! Sure I've dated and such but they never seem right for me. Will I be the only virgin in my circle of friends and family forever?

I've been faking, but I just don't want to tell him.

Anonymous asks:

I'm seventeen years old and have been sexually active with my boyfriend for the year that we have been together. I have faked orgasm almost every time we have had intercourse. I have read your site and read the dialogue you have provided on how to come clean about this form of dishonesty. However, I feel that at this point I am not sure the best thing to do is come clean. I would like your thoughts on what sort of dialogue I should be having with my boyfriend concerning different things we can do so that I can achieve orgasm, without hurting his feelings. Do you think it's healthy to not tell him at all and move on towards a healthier relationship?

Can you tell me about inverted nipples?

Amanda asks:

I just stumbled onto this site and have found it really informative. But I was surprised to see that, while many people have posted their body image concerns, no one seems to have brought up inverted nipples. I have always felt self conscious about my nipples because they're inverted. Although my boyfriend loves me very much and I doubt he would care, I still have this fear inside that they don't live up to every male fantasy of boobs and what they're supposed to be, so I don't want him to see them. I would hate if he was disappointed by part of me. I am wondering if it is very common to have inverted nipples, and also if males find it unattractive. I know that there is surgery to change this, but I don't know if it is very healthy or a good idea, and I would rather let that be my last resort. I used to think maybe it would change during puberty, but I am 17 so I'm figuring that it won't be something I grow out of at this point. So, I guess what I'm asking is, can you tell me about inverted nipples?

When I'm fingering her, she seems completely unaffected: what's the deal?

Stevenmagee asks:

I have fingered my girlfriend quite a few times now. I can only get one finger up there and she never seems to react, just stands there as if nothing is going on. Am I doing something wrong?

Neither of us are reaching orgasm, but I need him to.

Frustrated asks:

I'm 17 and I have a boyfriend of 7 months, and we're both very much in love. We had sex 4 months ago and he didn't reach orgasm and I got the sense he was frustrated so we stopped trying until last weekend. We both really wanted it but the same situation happened where he didn't reach orgasm and I feel like it's my fault and that I'm just not hot enough for him. I never reach orgasm during sex but I always enjoy it and I want to have sex but the problem is I don't want to do it if he's not enjoying himself or feels frustrated and I also don't want to come off as though I want sex all the time because I'm his first girlfriend and he hadn't done anything sexual before me - not even kiss - whereas I was not a virgin upon entering the relationship, so I don't want to come off as if I'm a rushing things all the time. After all this, my question is: What can I do to make my boyfriend enjoy sex enough to orgasm? He has never finished during sex and I get the feeling he's frustrated with it and would rather I suck him off but I always want sex when we're fooling around and I love him so much I want us both to be able to pleasure each other at the same time.

How can I make my first time special?

Sarah M. asks:

Having read several of your articles concerning "first time" sex, I understand that it may not (and probably won't be?) everything I'm expecting, and that you're "first time" isn't as big a deal as society makes it seem. But I would really like my first time to be special. Not necessarily perfect, but an event in my life I can look back on fondly. Is there anything I can do/should know that would make it more special?

By the way, I think this site and what you do here is awesome, and I am so so grateful that this resource is available. Keep it up!

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