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Why can't I get off with someone else (or just my girlfriend)?

Anonymous asks:
I am 18 and can't seem to find sex pleasurable at all. I am in a lesbian relationship and my girlfriend has a bigger sex drive than me so I want to be able to have a healthy sexual relationship with her. Every time she tries to finger me or penetrate me at all it hurts so badly, She says it's normal and we have to do it a few more times until I get used to it but the pain is unbearable....