Then don't! Here's a feast of support and help for those who want to say no, not now, or not-like-this to sex or sexual relationships.
I first learned asexuality existed around a year ago. I decided to research it simply because it was something I had never heard about and wanted to be informed. I came across AVEN and several blogs with people telling about their own experiences with asexuality and debunking myths....
I'm Asexual and currently engaged in a romantic relationship with a woman. She really wants to have sex, I'm not really into it. We've done other things I really like, like making out and heaving petting. How do I tell her that I don't want to sleep with her without making her feel inferior, undesirable and bad about herself? I'm scared to hurt her. Should I just compromise and sleep with her?...
Asexuality saved my sex life. No, seriously -- I mean that. I will declare it from the middle of a courtroom, with one hand on Our Bodies, Ourselves. Asexuality, as much as sex-positive feminism and far more than any amount of "hon, you just need to get laid already," helped me to access a confident, positive, and excited relationship with my sexual self.
I am 22 years old and have been with my one and only boyfriend for over 2 1/2 years now. I love him very much and we get along well, but our sexual life has always had problems....
Can you be attracted to one gender sexually and the other mentally? How can that work with having a relationship?...
I'm 17 years old and discovered the asexuality link on this site and I fit it really well, I feel safe to say that that website is the best thing that ever happened to me. But I'm not completely absent of sexual feeling, I just don't act on it....
I am celibate and a virgin. I don't masturbate. I think all forms of sexual activity are ok as long as people say safe and respectful, and this includes masturbation. I was never abused....
My boyfriend and I are 22 and 21, respectively, and have been dating for two years. We recently moved into an apartment and now live together. We're committed to not having sex before marriage, but we've been doing other sexual things since we started dating. When we first got together, he was somewhat interested in oral sex (me to him, but NOT him to me) and touching and stuff....