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arousal

Will hell freeze over before I reach orgasm?

Anonymous asks:

Hello, I have browsed your web page and didn't exactly find what I was looking for so I am wondering if you could answer my question. Yes, it is orgasm related. You see I have been sexually active for a long time. I am 17 and I have been with my boyfriend for two and a half years. He was a virgin when he met me but I wasn't.

The problem with me is: I have never had an orgasm. I know what you are going to say. "Not all women have an orgasm during intercourse." I get that, but I never had an orgasm during masturbation, or foreplay. Nothing. And now I am kind of pressuring myself to go. Well, not exactly pressuring myself, but in my mind I go: "Yes, right there, omg I am gonna come." When in truth, I am nowhere close. My brain might have just been sexually turned on to the max at that point, but I just don't go.

How do I make my erection last longer for intercourse?

funkykingston asks:

Hi guys: I'm a 15 year old male, not in a relationship, and really doubt I'll be having intercourse any time soon. However, given that I have the time, commitment and attitude for it I thought it might be a good idea to train myself to last longer for intercourse, so that when the time does come I feel, y'no, good about myself.

I've been masturbating with varying regularity for a bit less than a year now, so I know myself and my sexual responses. I'd also like to make it clear that I don't: a)feel unconfident and generally scared of intercourse from fear of inadequacy, b)have unrealistic ideas about what is 'normal' from pornography, or c)think that intercourse is the only 'real' sex, and that how long you can last is a measure of how good or 'manly' you are.

This said, I also know that improved ejaculatory control would be useful in the future to improve the amount of pleasure me and my future partners get out of intercourse, and starting now would likely be more effective. I try to masturbate with a relaxed attitude, and not in environments where I'm somehow pushed for time or otherwise stressed. I've read about a lot of techniques online, but given that 'premature ejaculation' is a problem so many people have a lot of anxiety about and there's obviously a huge amount of money to be made in convincing people that you have some miracle cure for their problem, I thought I'd ask you guys at Scarleteen about what sort of things actually work in the real world and what's just fantasy.

Why do men lose erections after they ejaculate?

confused?? asks:

Why do men lose erections after they ejaculate?

Do Drugs and Booze Make You Better in Bed?

A recent study was released which shows that European teens are using alcohol and recreational drugs with the intentional aim of improving their sex lives.

Read more...

Is Arguing Really A Turn On?

Anonymous asks:

I've never been a conflictual person, but I discovered my temper when I met this guy. We tried to have a casual relationship, but we are too alike or too different cause we argue/discuss/debate constantly; but we haven't been able to stop having sex. Its like arguing with each other is a turn on. Is this normal?

Is it "gross" to get wet?

mckac asks:

I get really really wet! It's really gross. My boyfriend wants to go down on me and finger me, but I don't want him to think I'm gross. Is it normal to be so wet? Will he think it's ok?

Can a gynecologist tell if a girl has an orgasm?

silentwater asks:

Can a gynecologist tell if a girl has an orgasm?

On why rape isn't her fault, no matter how you want to spin it, buster.

James asks:

Hi Heather, I just found a question from 'samy-baby' concerning rape when performing a google search for something unrelated as it caught my eye. I'm afraid you appeared all too eager to label the bloke as unsafe and 'stay well away from him', given that the girl openly admitted within the first words of her sentence that she gets her boyfriend stupid-horny then says "no sex", that's just cruel, and I doubt many men would tolerate it. I've made it abundantly clear with my girlfriend that if she makes the effort to turn me into a horn-monster, she should finish through or I'm usually very pissed off; not to say that I'd go ahead and have sex with her anyway. All I'm saying is you failed to advise this girl that if she doesn't want to have sex, then she shouldn't get her boyfriend horny.

He couldn't get it up: is it because of me?

first timer asks:

I'm 17,and I have been dating this guy for like a year. We just started having sex, and the other day we were going to but he wanted me to give him head before so he would last longer...then he could not get it back up. He tried hard to but it just wouldn't. Was it me? Can I just not do it for him or something?

He's 15, and we've tried everything, so why can't he get it up and get off?

Cheybaby asks:

My boy friend is 15, has never had an erection and every time we want to have sex we can't. He thought it might be a medical problem but he asked the doctor and said no medical problem here. We have tried everything. The first thing we tried was dry humping and nothing happened and then I tried grinding him they say that can be very arousing but it didn't work. I let him look at porn and nothing happened. More suggestions?

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