Luckily, my mom let me go on the pill. She knows my boyfriend and I are sexually active, but if she suspects sex is happening in her house, she'll run in to break it up. When it comes to sex, itself, I feel pretty much supported, because she is not shaming me, but she's still trying to protect my virtue.
However, when my parents caught me looking at porn, they said it was wrong. "But you're a girl? Why are you looking at porn? Is there something wrong with you?"
Growing up I was told I wasn't allowed to date until 18 and I certainly wasn't allowed to have sex, at least until I was planning on marriage. I ended up dating for the first time when I was 17 after pleading with my parents to let me date. When we became sexually active I had tried to talk to my mom about seeing a Gynocologist. Her response was basically that I didn't need one since I wasn't having sex. We ended up using condoms but had a few slip ups and I ended up pregnant. Yes I should have been more careful and used condoms more safely. But still, if we had gone to a gyno and I'd gotten on the pill like I had wanted it would never have happened.
I've recieved enough support from my mom and sister, though I haven't told her because I know she will ask things like which one is my favorite position and things like that that my sister does tell her.The only person I have sex with is just a friend of mine, but I still know there would be no problem with that.
Other than that, I've told two counselors at my old high school [a private catholic school] and they were like: how do you feel about it? and I replied "nice" but they didn't reject me or hate me!
My situation was a little different--I did absolutely nothing sexual with anyone but myself until college. I grew up in a sex-negative household where I was told the traditional messages like "good girls wait." Probably the worst things I heard were the fact that losing my virginity would be unbearably painful and sex might always be painful (lies! at least for me), and if my parents ever found me pregnant I would be forced to carry the baby to term and give it up for adoption. However, campus health services at my college are great about providing info about birth control as well as covering the cost. My doctor has also been great and very non-judgmental about answering my questions. So, in short, while my parents were anything but honest and helpful about educating me about sex, not everyone has their hang-ups.
I just live with my Mom and I feel 100% able to ask her and discuss anything. I feel like that is because I am an unschooler and we have a close, trusting relationship.
The only adults I've felt comfortable talking to about my sexuality have been adults whose job it is to be willing to talk to young people about this sort of thing. My doctor was brilliant when I wanted information on contraceptive options; the clinic she referred me to when I needed a cervical exam was also full of brilliant people. I'm very lucky to live in a country with such good public healthcare: I can get any necessary medical consultations, contraceptives and/or STI tests for free. If I lived somewhere where I had to rely on my parents' insurance for these things, I'd be screwed - my mother strongly believes all non-marital sex to be sinful and has some very disturbing views on a woman's role in a relationship, so I've never been able to ask her for help or advice when it comes to my sexuality.
afraid I'll get kicked out if my parents know I'm sexually active, even through I have been in the same monogamous relationship for nearly 4 years. I have to go to Planned Parenthood rather than use my insurance because my dad would see on the insurance bills if I got on the pill or anything of that nature(on his insurance because I'm in college part time). I am glad I make as much as I do with my full time job, but even $180 for a 6 months of pills through them is too much, but these are the problems that I am stuck with. I'm really considering an IUD as a long term investment because there wouldn't be any empty packaging to risk being found unlike the BC pill.
I had an English teacher in high school who I'm still friends with to this day, and although I didn't have sex until two years after I graduated said high school, I always felt comfortable talking to her about my relationships and sexual decision-making. My mother is supportive of my choices, but I didn't feel comfortable talking to her about sex until I was already having it, when I was almost 20. I have no idea if my dad supports my decision to have sex, or even knows about it, because we have never discussed it.
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