No dating until College! My mom says no guys but she wouldn't be as angry if I dated a girl since girls can't get me pregnant. I tried dating at 16 but it got difficult, (not the relationship, but schoolwork, friends and ex boyfriend felt I made no time but I was usually in trouble for stupid stuff like coming home late or failing a test) So my mom says MAYBE 17 but Dad says no real dating until after college but if I must, grow up, mature & wait until college.
My mom's attitude (and my attitude) is that my career is more important and that if I want to be in a relationship, it will happen eventually. I'm not sure exactly how my dad would react if I brought someone home, but he wants grandchildren someday (lol no cause I don't want to do that to my body and I hate kids), but I get the sense he wants me to find someone already. I'm 24 and I've only gone out with 1 guy for less than a month and we didn't do much together (just some kissing and what have you).
My parents want me to practice safe sex if I'm intimately involved with anyone, but I don't think they have any sort of strong preference about whether I date casually or exclusively, and I know they don't care about the gender or orientation of people I date. However, since I just got out of a really committed, long-term relationship, my mother has specifically said that she doesn't want me to come home from college for the summer and introduce her to my fiancé(e) or anything, so I gather that she would like me to not get super wrapped-up in another committed relationship right away.
My parents have said I'm too young (I'm 14) to be interested, but I don't think they'd forbid me from dating. I've never dated and only talked about guys I think are attractive, so they haven't had anything to really complain about yet. I'm definitely not allowed to have sex though.
My guardians think that any guy I date is bad. And that if they're going to approve of him, he has to be picked out by them or my cousin. But I don't listen. It's my life.
My mum said as long as its not too serious its ok to date more than one guy at once as thats what she did with my dad, must work they're still together 35 years on.
My sis (guardian) just plain doesn't want me dating right now because it's my senior year and I should be focusing on school. Snuff to that tho, because I plan on just saying I'm 'hanging out' when I'm really going on a date with some one.
My parents are really scared of me 'growing up'. I had a childhood accident that almost took my life, so they are really protective of me. They both have said multiple times "You can't date untill after you're married!" I guess they are really scared of me dating:o
just put a condom on it, i dont whant a grandchild yet.
My parents don't want me to have sex before marriage and when they found out that I lost my virginity at 17, my mom cried. They are both super conservative Christian people so I guess my more liberal leanings don't interest them. If they found out that I've had sex with more than one person on a regular basis, they would probably die.
They don't "support my preferences" but, actually, encourage relationships I don't wish to have. My mother insisted that I should have a boyfriend when I was 14 and start having sex when I was 16.
they hate that i have a boyfriend.
my mom did get a little tipsy one time and told me that i should be "adored" by whoever im dating. hahaha.
"I'm going out to the garrage to get the pickle jar and the nut cracker. I'll be right back." -Dad on dating
Hahaha, I'm sorry. But that is funny. I wish my dad would be like that. My uncle said that he would just get the nail gun. D: Poor boys.
I'm almost 19, have a bf of almost a year. My parents were never okay with me dating any guy. And I haven't told themm about my boyfriend. People say that it's my business and that if I think I'm responsible enough then tell them when the time is right. But I also don't want to tell them one day that "Hey I've had this bf for anout 2 years now"
Really don't know what to do
I started dating at 19. I first had sex at 24, when I was engaged. My parents didn't learn until after the engagement was over that we'd been sleeping together, and they were NOT happy. Conservative Christians. I'm not financially dependent on them, nor do I live with them, so they don't really get to tell me what to do anymore. If I don't want them to know something, all I have to do for the most part is not mention it, and they don't know.
My parents have always said I couldn't date until I was 18, now I'm 18 and am dating and they don't really like it. They know my boyfriend, we've been friends for a few years too. It's also not like I'm bringing some moron or "gangster" or something, he's a nice guy and would never hurt me (95% cuz he loves me and 5% cuz he fears for his safety should he do so XD). My mom has more or less accepted it (she's still got the lovingly paranoid thing going, wouldn't have it any other way) but both parents can be totally annoying too. They blame a lot of the stuff I do (or don't do) on my relationship with him, and my stepdad still mostly refuses to acknowledge that I have a boyfriend. Any adult who cares about me isn't feeling it either. I keep getting all this advice (that I've heard before when I was younger and plan on following anyway), they've annoyed both my boyfriend and myself with all their warnings and crap and again a lot of stuff gets blamed on him. I wish my parents (and other caring adults) would just calm down and trust me to keep listening to them
Well I'm 23 now so my parents aren't about to dictate how I get involved with other people. When I was in my teens, they probably wouldn't have approved of dating though. Honestly, they still don't, but now we're at a point where they just expect me to become self-sufficient and we'll all live and let live.
What's the point of wearing your favorite rocketship underpants if no one asks to see 'em? -Calvin & Hobbes
My father tends to think I shouldn't be dating OR in a serious relationship, since I'm a lesbian... He really doesn't like that.
This is a neat topic and it's interesting to see the results. I wonder what role age plays in this: surely, it changes with time/experience. Now in my my mid-twenties, my parents aren't involved when it comes to who I'm dating or have a relationship with unless I choose to tell them. However, they're also very supportive of whatever I choose, both in terms of whom I date but also for life decisions in general. Unsurprisingly, it's changed over the years because it's different when you're a minor and living under their roof versus when you're an independent adult with both the privileges and responsibilities that it brings.
I'd love to hear more details about people's votes here:
- Why do your parents/guardians feel this way, and do you agree with them?
- Can you talk to your parents about dating/relationships, and are they open to compromise?
- How has their attitude changed over time, if applicable?
My parents r actually mad at me for not DATING!!! It wacko, there always ask if I got a bf yet. At first I though they were playin, but then they start recircut crazy!!!
My parents are really skittish about dating, and they're pretty racist about it, frankly. They're from India, which is very conservative in matters of dating & marriage, and they had an arranged marriage. They're thinking about arranging my own sister's marriage right now, and they expect to arrange my marriage sometime in the future. I am in no way, shape, or form even ready to contemplate marriage. (For reference, my sister is 22 and about to graduate college - I'm 18 and about to start college. My mom got married when she was 23.) And even if I were to start dating seriously, he would have to be someone who is Indian and Hindu. Anyone outside that would be a huge no-no in my family. It sucks: we're not in the old country anymore, so they have no reason to be anal about dating. I was born and raised in the U.S., and that wasn't a choice that I made. They knew fully well that the U.S. would be different, so I have no idea why they're trying to create a little India. Lucky for all the people who get the freedom they need.
My parents are also planning on arranging my marriage (they have the matchmaker and everything) they arranged marriages for all my elder brothers, I have 7, with good little Indian girls from back home, now I'm 20, I'm in college and one day I come home and my mom is like go put on a sari some friends are visiting. You can imagine how infuriated I was when I had to go through a whole charade and my mother was answering questions for me like I've lost my ability to speak: "Where are you going to work when you finish college" "Oh she is not going to work when she finishes college she's going to be at home with her husband and her children haan". Dating has always been a big no no in my household and for the most part I went along with that ('cuz I'm a good little Indian girl like that lol) but in college I have met a guy I sincerely like (he's Nigerian and my parents are going to kill me no doubt) and I know that bringing him home is going to be hell, but I don't care, I've done everything their way, now I'm gonna live my life.
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