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Jealousy, the Boyfriend and the New Guy
Relationships can come with complications. Discussion about when it really is the "right time" to leave a relationship.
Should I get out now?Your First Time
What was your first time like? Our users share the story of the first time they had a significant sexual encounter.
Your First TimeJoking around or something more?
When does friendly joking cross the line to flirting? How can you have a friendship with someone while asserting that you do not want to date them? And how does age complicate all of it?
Is it wrong to entertain a much older man?How to tell a reluctant parent about an engagement
Did you recently get engaged? Are you having difficulty telling your parents about it? Read one of our user's dilemma about telling her mother some exciting news.
Telling Mom about my engagement!How do you deal with a partner who disses your body?
When a boyfriend/girlfriend says something seriously negative about your sexual anatomy, how do you deal with it? Here's what some users have to say.
When partners do hate your bodyFinding a healthy relationship after an abusive one
After being abused, it can sometimes be difficult to imagine that healthy relationships exist, or what they would even feel like. In this thread, users talk about what a healthy relationship does look and feel like, and share their own experiences with healthy relationships.
What does a healthy relationship look and feel like?Who's the man?
Our volunteer Joey muses over gender norms and heteronormative structures in non-heterosexual relationships. Read her and our other users thoughts on the subject and feel free to add your own thoughts or experiences.
So She Must Be The Man In The Relationship ..."Real" People, Real Gender Stereotypes
One of our users shares an experience with a date that was stuck to strict gender roles. Read as our users discuss this experience along with their own and consider what it means to be a "real" person.
a "real" manExcuses used to explain or justify abusive relationships.
"So often, it's clear that until someone gets out of an abusive relationship, they don't recognize how often they make excuses for a partner's abuse, self-blame or rationalize their abuse away with a million different excuses and fables." Here, Scarleteen message board users share the excuses they made (to themselves and others) for a partner's abusive behaviour, reasons and explanations that made much less sense (if any sense at all) once they were free of the abusive relationship. These excuses range from taking responsibility on self, blaming characteristics and circumstances the abusive partner had no control over, to using practical reasons for remaining in an unhealthy partnership.
The Excuses You Made For ThemAvoiding abusive or unhealthy relationships: Identifying Hard Limits and Relationship Deal-Breakers
So, you got out of an abusive relationship (rock on, you!).
Now that you have, or since you have, you obviously want to do all you can to never get trapped in one again.
Obviously, we can only see so much coming: none of us is psychic, and as many of us know all too well, abusive people can be slippery and manipulative and awfully hard to see coming.
But one thing we can do is to form some hard lines, some dealbreakers, some things someone might do that can tip us off to them not being healthy or healthy for us, things where we just go "Oh, nuh UH," and vow to turn away and get gone ASAP, rather than getting pulled in.
We might be talking about someone saying really sexist stuff, someone demonstrating in some way they can't manage their anger, someone who is very jealous or possessive, someone who says things that suggest they want to control how we dress, who we hang out with, how we spend our time.
Do you have any of these now? What are they?
The Nuh-uhs- « first
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