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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Support Groups » depression and suicide

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Author Topic: depression and suicide
coldplayer
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i never realised how many people my age attemp serious suicide. one of my ex-boyfriends slit his wrists at the age of 11 and was in hospital for a week, he also overdosed on painkillers. i've also found out that another close mate has attemped suicide 7 times through pills and drink. i cant believe it! they both have issues, but not all of them that i've known. a few of my mates cut their arms for attention, show it off next day, 'ohh boo hoo poor me'. that gets me cross because they dont realise how s**t they would feel if they really did have problems.
i am beginning to feel really depressed recently myself. my parents split 4 years ago, and i have to see dad every sunday. he is a strong christian who forces his beliefs onto me. i cant take it, i was christian for 11 years but its all too much now. but he wont stop, its why my mum left him and now its driving me away too. theres way more, but i bottle everything up inside, and when i do talk, i just cry it all out. i dont whine for attention like some of them do, i previously cut my legs, but didnt show a soul. thats showed me that i wasnt seeking attention. i wouldnt ever slit my wrists cause i have a serious phobia of wrists, i cant even look at or touch mine. i wouldnt even think about taking my own life because its such a waste and the people i left behind would be so upset it wouldnt be fair. but i find it very difficult to pick myself back up, even if nothing really bad has happened to make me feel bad. i need to talk about stuff alot, but when i begin to touch the surface i feel selfish for making my best mate worry bacause she does, i dont mean to look as down as i do, i just cant stop it! 2 of my mates have councilling and one wants me to try it too cause i also have 'issues' but i dont want sympothy or for my mum to find out that i feel as bad as i do, even though she has noticed and worries loads. i dont wanna go on pills to help, and talking makes me feel worse and 'attention seeking' i came home from school today because i felt so depressed, but i said i felt sick, well i did, sick with sadness. i just have to deal with it i guess, but i wish it was easier. does anyone understand me? or am i 'attention seeking' to you?

Posts: 68 | From: England | Registered: Mar 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
cupcake
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Alright, this is coming from someone whose clode friend tried to slit his wrists last Thursday. This is all very fresh.

I know going to counselling seems like a big deal- but essentially, they are just someone who can listen to you, and who has a degree just in case.

I don't think you're attention-seeking, and think about it, even if you were, wouldn't that be cause to go to a counsellor anyways?

If there's one thing I've learned ou tof this, it is this: Taking care of yourself isn't selfish. It should be the number 1 priority. And if you're taking care of YOU, people aren't going to think you're selfish either.


Posts: 433 | From: Canada | Registered: Jun 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
cupcake
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(That's not saying that a counsellor isn't important. A councellor is TOTALLY important- that degree makes all the difference. YOur friends are there for you, but sometimes, things need real medical help, and we can't help with that)
Posts: 433 | From: Canada | Registered: Jun 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
coldplayer
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i seemed a bit down to my mum once and she had a go at me for feeling sorry for myself and went on about people living on medication- like it was a really bad thing. thats why i dont wanna go there, incase i do need them and she gets mad that i cant deal with my own problems myself. i wish i could tell her how bad i feel, but i cant work out what i could say anyway. i'm off school again today because i couldnt face going and my mates have emailed asking why i looked so depressed. ohhhh i feel worse everyday, should i really think about seeing my school counciller??
Posts: 68 | From: England | Registered: Mar 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
alaska
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yup, see your school counsellor, cold, or your gp or talk to any other adult who you can trust. you might even call a helpline if you think no one around you can help.

thing is, depression is a chemical thing, too. sometimes, you just can not "snap out of it" because your brain chemicals are out of synch. that's when anti-depressant medication can help. starting medication or being on medication does not make someone a looser, and doesn't mean you can't deal with yoru issues.
same goes for seeing a psychiatrist or psychologist. - i think asking for help (of whatever kind) actually shows one is strong enough to realise when you need help.
i have been seeing a psychologist for a good while, and am very thankful for what i've learned during that time (and through the built up to a big life change), and how much it has helped me.

as to how to start talking about feeling low: say "i've been feeling low lately. and it's been overwhelming. i need your help." and then go on describing what's been going on inside your head.
i remember sitting in front of my gp three years ago, trying to tell him i was depressed, and that first sentence *was* difficult, and i started crying afterwards, because it was the first time i had actually told someone how bad i was feeling.

give it a try, cold. we're here to listen, too, but do talk to someone in real life, and i'd suggest giving talking to your mom a try. most parents have pretty good sensorts for when their kids are really upset and often react totally different than you'd expect. it was true for my mom, who i always expected to get angry when i needed her help, but when i dared to tell her what was wrong, she was always supportive and helpful.
give your mom a chance, yes?

------------------
Caro
~Scarleteen Sexpert~

Spike: Well, I'm not good and I'm okay.


Posts: 4526 | From: germany | Registered: Nov 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
coldplayer
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i'll think about it, but i really don't want all the fuss. thamks for your help x
Posts: 68 | From: England | Registered: Mar 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
alaska
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cold, asking for help isn't making "fuss". - in my opinion, it's quite the contrary.
in my experience, if you don't deal with stuff as it comes up and take appropriate action, all that stuff will accumulate and the final meltdown when you've reached your limit will create more "fuss" then if you had dealt with stuff earlier.

think about it, hm?


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coldplayer
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yeah, i'm thinking about it.
Posts: 68 | From: England | Registered: Mar 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Milke
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coldplayer, I'm curious why you asked for help when you seem so resistant to our suggestions. Reaching out is only a start; you have to be able to accept the assistance people offer in order for it to get anyone anywhere.

------------------
Milke, with an L, SSBD, RATS, TMNTP

Sink, swim, go down with the ship, but use your freedom of choice!


Posts: 5122 | From: I *came* from the land of ice and snow | Registered: Aug 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
coldplayer
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i've started cutting my legs
Posts: 68 | From: England | Registered: Mar 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Milke
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Would you like assistance in getting help with that problem, or are you just announcing it in case we'd like to know?

------------------
Milke, with an L, SSBD, RATS, TMNTP, MF

I still love you, oh, I still love you
...Only slightly, only slightly less than I used to


Posts: 5122 | From: I *came* from the land of ice and snow | Registered: Aug 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Gumdrop Girl
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coldplayer, it does get frustrating for us, the people who are trying to help you, when you simply refuse to follow any of the advice we give you. It is very clear that this is something you want to talk about to get off your chest, otherwise, i don't see why you'd bother posting.

But you are doing harm to yourself by not seeking professional help in the form of therapy or counselling. We are offering you advice, coldplayer. It is up to you to take it, and bob-help-you, I hope you do 'cause just telling us you are cutting isn't going to help the situation. you need to make the choice NOT to cut and to seek profesisonal help, otherwise posting here is just pointless.

------------------
Mmm ... crispy, delicious bacon.


Posts: 12677 | From: Los Angeles, CA ... somewhere off the 10 | Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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