im so tired of everything. ive had this stupid group project where me and a couple others have been working soo much, and other people have hardly done ANYTHING for it, but we get the same grade...in band i never practice,and the teacher made me sign up for UIL, and i dont know my music..its on friday!!! i was sick and couldnt practice with my group either. i didnt even WANT to do it. i have tons of makeup work and i havent finished it yet, and i left some at my friends house after working on the project. i broke my clock. i feel like im so...materialistic. im sick of having this phone and computer and clothes and cds. i hate who i am. i feel ready to trade with some poor kid in a third world country who doesnt do projects or worry about wars.. someone who doesnt know things that i know. my grades are slipping in band especially. im smart i know so i make it through with good grades, but im tired of this.i just dont know. today after working on project i came home and just cried and i want to quit. i want to go somewhere far far away where i dont have to worry anymore. i dont want to be me anymore because i hate myself. i do stupid stuff. have ocd and can never make any decisions. im slacking off in band. i snap at my parents when they didnt do anything. i just...theres always something you know? homework or projects, birthday present needs to be bought,everything. i just want to stop. i want it over. its to hard and i hate myself for thinking that because i have it so easy! we have enough money that we are comfortable, not rolling in cash but good, i have parents and friends, i have some sense, no big trauma in my life, and i dont know whats wrong with me anymore. i did do a search before posting, but nothing really matched how i feel.
Posts: 131 | Registered: Apr 2002
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Ummm. Kids in third world countries are often FIGHTING wars, lass. From about age 12 onward in some places. Many wouldn't worry about grades because they'd be too busy worrying about helping to keep some meager food on their families table and they can't afford the supplies to go to school at all. I assure you, it wouldn't be the great trade you think it is.
What sounds to be wrong with you is that youare capital-S Stressed Out.
Why don't you sit down and breathe. Then make a list of all you have on your plate right now and figure out what you can tackle and what you just can't. Do what you CAN do first.
And perhaps find something to let off some of that steam with. Exercise, meditation, primal screaming in the backyard, whatever works for you.
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