Well im at 17 year old senior at my high school. I really dont know whats wrong with me at times. I do feel very very deeply depressed but other times im on top of the world. It comes and goes and so quickly to.
The other day in the morning i was fine, then i started to take a test at the end of 1st period and i just had serious thought of killing myself, like it came out of no where. i hated myself and didnt want anyone to talk to me, but then 3 period later i was jumping around cracking jokes. I thought i had my problem under control, but i didnt and i dont. I even started to punch glass just to feel the pain and cut myself to see the blood.
i know i seem like a really sick and twisted person but on the outside i keep my cool and try my best to make a good impression. NO one really knows about my problem, i dont tell anyone not even my mom. I dont know if there is anything wrong with me or if its all in my head. Like right now i dont wanna hurt myself but give me 20 minutes im gonna wanna jump out of a 12 story building.
I know ur all gonna say u need help go to counseling but ive gone to soo many different counselors and they all annoy the heck out of me after a few times and i have to switch and then i have to explain my story all over again and its getting old and boring and i dont wanna do it. but i do if itll help me, im prolly sounding really confusing but if someone could help me out and give me some advice or tell me what could possible be wrong with me if nething i would appreciate it!
Why is it that in the
land of the free, home
of the brave, why is it
that i still feel like a
Life is too short..Live it well and with the people you care about.. Don't ever let your work become your life... Go out there and live a little before its too late** Dr. Greene ER